I love the way that I can be so lazy. Let me take you back to a day before me and my friend, lets call her... Melvin, got a job. We were sitting around chillin' and she decides she should call our place of future employment for job interview. And the great part was I actually said, "Naw, don't call, I don't Really want a job." I actually said "Naw". Melvin mumbled something about being a lazy hippie.....
That was just a little segment of my life to enlighten you as to just how lazy I am.
Now I'll run you thru the course of an average day of my life that I don't go to work. I just want to prove that someone else in the world had a great idea and created something just to enhance how lazy I can truly be. Its the American dream.
I wake up and I hit the snooze button a couple of times. But the great part is my alarm clock has two setting so I can set the alarm to go for 2 different times. It just amazes me how someone thought....gee I wish I could set my alarm clock and if I sleep through myself hitting the snooze button too many times, my other alarm will go off..... After I roll out of bed at the crack of noon I turn my fan off. Some mornings I actually find myself wishing I had a remote control from my fan. So that I could just be that much lazier and not even have to move half a foot to turn off my fan. Then I'll open my windows. Once again I almost frighten myself, for I find myself wishing for automatic windows... in my bedroom. Like cars have them, so my room should too, right? I grab my remote for my tv, turn it on, turn on my vcr and turn on my sound system. I listen to the first 2 seconds of 5 CDS before I get up to change them because I don't want to listen to the ones I have in. I think its great that someone actually thought, first that, gee rewinding is such a bitch, wish I could listen to my music without having to do anything manually. So in marches CDS. But then someone thought, 1 CD in is not enough, I want to be able to sit here for the next 5 hours and not have to move. So along comes the 5-disc CD player, of course with remote control. I walk to the bathroom. I working on an invention so I don't even have to walk to the bathroom. I'm thinking a vacuum tube and a really long hose...... But anyway, I'd like to see someone upgrade the toilet. It already automatically flushes..... So I'm in the shower, with my look-at-me-I'm-lazy-shampoo-and-conditioner-in-one. I wonder who thought that up. Gee It takes so much extra time for me to condition, I wish both could be in one! I go to brush my teeth. Automatic toothbrush (gotta love being lazy). Maybe thats not even lazy, its just sad, can't even take the time to move a toothbrush around my mouth for like a minute. Automatic sink....... I use to blow-dry my hair, but it takes to much effort. So either I could use one of those cap things that beauty saloons have or just let it go. I go to get something to eat. Not 1 but 2 doors on the refrigerator. I drink some water that comes out of the freezer side door. I think our house needs a laundry shoot, and perhaps an elevator......
So in closing....... I love 1999, so many great inventions, with remote controls to improve my pursuit of the American dream... Do as little as possible and get the most out of it.
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