Season 5, episode 10
CAST
Production:
Draco and his band of thugs search some ruins for a treasure. They find a golden lyre. As soon as they dig it up, a band of amazons appear and tell them that since the treasure is on amazon land, it belongs to them. They begin to skirmish. Xena intervenes, taking the lyre with her whip. The amazon leader and Draco exchange verbal insults, and swords are drawn. They all get ready to fight. Xena, with Gabrielle and Joxer, look on. Xena suddenly bursts into "War, good god ya'll, what is it good for?" and they sing the entire song as everyone joins in. After they finish singing, Draco wants to know who gets the lyre if there isn't going to be a fight over it. Xena says there will be a battle: of the bands to win Harpsichord's lyre.
Everyone goes into a town, and everyone sings a huge production number. There are a lot of bands in town who wan tot participate in the battle of the bands. Xena sends Gabrielle to audition the bands to see who makes the first cut. Xena's mother shows up and coos over Xena's big belly but she is concerned that there is no father. Gabrielle auditions bands. They are all really bad. Xena comes in, and then they hear the strains of a piano playing a latin disco. They go see, and Jace, Joxer's brother, is a lounge singer. He does a latin/disco/something version of "Dancing in the Moonlight". Xena and Gabrielle join in a conga line. Draco threatens Jace, apparently because Jace is gay, and Xena threatens Draco for threatening Jace. Joxer and Jace have a reunion and Joxer tells Jace to get away from him. Xena and Jace talk about how Joxer wants to be what he isn't, a warrior. The amazon leader keeps flirting with Joxer. Joxer was talking to Gabrielle, who seems disturbed because Joxer is paying attention to someone else. The amazons rehearse their dancing and singing. Draco tries to talk to Gabrielle. Draco then has a daydream where he does rap/hard rock/something version of "Always Something There to Remind Me." During the daydream he walks through flowers with Gabrielle and they are in the hot tub. Draco swears to no one in particular that if he can't have Gabrielle, no one will have her.
The amazons watch Jace, and their leader thinks he is cool. Xena and Gabrielle talk about Joxer's latest infatuation, and Gabrielle says the leader isn't the right person for Joxer, and Xena tells Gabrielle that she shouldn't interfere if she doesn't want him. During all this stuff guys keep coming up to Xena to audition for the part of husband and father because Xena's mother put up posters all over town.
Jace and Joxer talk again. Jace insults Joxer. Xena finds her mother, and then Xena and the amazons sing a version of the "Sisters are doin' it for themselves" song. Jace shows up and applauds. Xena's mother says Xena has always marched to her own drum, anyhow. But she still would like to know who the father is. There is no answer.
Draco whines about Gabrielle. Lots of people show up for the battle of the bands concert and the crowd starts getting rowdy because no one wants to go on first. Xena tells Gabrielle she'll take care of it and she disappears. Draco grabs Gabrielle, puts a sword to her throat, and asks her to marry him. He tells her she's part of his "act" now and she'll die at the end of his performance. Draco and his band open with a rock song. Gabrielle is in a cage hanging from the ceiling. Draco has a flaming guitar. Somebody gives Gabrielle a rock and she tries to break out of her cage but can't. Draco tells Gabrielle goodbye. Xena appears, and plays part of the Xena theme on the lyre. Gabrielle escapes and jumps into the mosh pit. Another band, the amazons, are playing portions of the Xena theme. Xena and Draco rap. They jump on top of people's heads and start fighting, like they did in Sins of the Past. They keep on rapping. They keep on fighting. Draco hits the floor with a guitar rendition of Xena's theme playing in the background. The amazon leader kisses Draco.
Gabrielle and Joxer talk. Gabrielle says it was strange seeing Joxer with someone else. Gabrielle says Joxer means a lot to her. Joxer tries to ask her for a date but Gabrielle says no way. The crowd chants for Xena. Jace tells Xena she won the lyre, but Xena tells the crowd she is leaving the lyre in this musical town. The Xena and everyone sings "People want to be free, peace in the valley" (I'm not sure of the name of that particular song). Jace and Joxer join her. Gabrielle joins in and sings a verse, too. Gabrielle and Xena stand beside each other. The show ends on this song as a big production number.
THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR
My Disclaimer: Things were taken from whoosh, sentances, paragraphs, etc.
