What is Hoosier
Fest?
Hoosier Fest is often a
spontaneous event where locals gather to assault and mollest fellow participants
in numerous ways. Underwear is normally removed, people are
hog-tied and assaulted with gardening tools, and currently, urine is being
incorporated into the festivities. It is often an annual event, and
usuall takes place within the vacinity of the Carnie
residence.
But why?
No one knows for sure, but it is thought that
such fests bring joy to the hoosier community, and at the same time bring sexual
pleasure to some of the participants (David
Carnie).
How can I
join?
Due to the fact that Hoosier Fest is often
spontaneous and unplanned, the only way to participate in a Hoosier Fest is to
just be in the right place at the right time. But like Mr. Bickel, you can
often join a Hoosier Fest just by following the screams and cries for
help from participants being
assaulted.
