Chicken Soup for the Soul #10
It's Never Too Late
Several years ago, while attending a communications course,
I experienced a most unusual process. The instructor asked us to
list anything in our past that we felt ashamed of, guilty about,
regretted, or incomplete about. The next week he invited
participants to read their lists aloud. This seemed like a very
private process, but there's always some brave soul in the crowd
who will volunteer. As people read their lists, mine grew longer.
After three weeks, I had 101 items on my list. The instructor
then suggested that we find ways to make amends, apologize to
people, or take some action to right any wrongdoing. I was
seriously wondering how this could ever improve my
communications, having visions of alienating just about everyone
from my life.
The next week, the man next to me raised his hand and
volunteered this story:
"While making my list, I remembered an incident from high
school. I grew up in a small town in Iowa. There was a sheriff in
town that none of us kids liked. One night, my two buddies and I
decided to play a trick on Sheriff Brown. After drinking a few
beers, we found a can of red paint, climbed the tall water tank
in the middle of town, and wrote, on the tank, in bright red
letters: Sheriff Brown is an s.o.b. The next day, the town arose
to see our glorious sign. Within two hours, Sheriff Brown had my
two pals and me in his office. My friends confessed and I lied,
denying the truth. No one ever found out.
"Nearly 20 years later, Sheriff Brown's name appears on my
list. I didn't even know if he was still alive. Last weekend, I
dialed information in my hometown back in Iowa. Sure enough,
there was a Roger Brown still listed. I dialed his number. After
a few rings, I heard: `Hello?' I said: `Sheriff Brown?' Pause.
`Yup.' `Well, this is Jimmy Calkins. And I want you to know that
I did it.' Pause. `I knew it!' he yelled back. We had a good
laugh and a lively discussion. His closing words were: `Jimmy, I
always felt badly for you because your buddies got it off their
chest, and I knew you were carrying it around all these years. I
want to thank you for calling me...for your sake.'"
Jimmy inspired me to clear up all 101 items on my list. It
took me almost two years, but became the springboard and true
inspiration for my career as a conflict mediator. No matter how
difficult the conflict, crisis or situation, I always remember
that it's never too late to clear up the past and begin resolution.
By Marilyn Manning
from Condensed Chicken Soup for the Soul
Copyright 1996 by Jack Canfield,
Mark Victor Hansen & Patty Hansen
Follow Your Dream
I have a friend named Monty Roberts who owns a horse ranch
in San Ysidro. He has let me use his house to put on fund-raising
events to raise money for youth at risk programs.
The last time I was there he introduced me by saying, "I
want to tell you why I let Jack use my house. It all goes back to
a story about a young man who was the son of an itinerant horse
trainer who would go from stable to stable, race track to race
track, farm to farm and ranch to ranch, training horses. As a
result, the boy's high school career was continually interrupted.
When he was a senior, he was asked to write a paper about what he
wanted to be and do when he grew up.
"That night he wrote a seven-page paper describing his goal
of someday owning a horse ranch. He wrote about his dream in
great detail and he even drew a diagram of a 200-acre ranch,
showing the location of all the buildings, the stables and the
track. Then he drew a detailed floor plan for a 4,000-square-foot
house that would sit on a 200-acre dream ranch.
"He put a great deal of his heart into the project and the
next day he handed it in to his teacher. Two day later he
received his paper back. On the front page was a large red F with
a note that read, `See me after class.'
"The boy with the dream went to see the teacher after class
and asked, `Why did I receive an F?'
"The teacher said, `This is an unrealistic dream for a young
boy like you. You have no money. You come from an itinerant
family. You have no resources. Owning a horse ranch requires a
lot of money. You have to buy the land. You have to pay for the
original breeding stock and later you'll have to pay large stud
fees. There's no way you could ever do it.' Then the teacher
added, `If you will rewrite this paper with a more realistic
goal, I will reconsider your grade.'
"The boy went home and thought about it long and hard. He
asked his father what he should do. His father said, `Look, son,
you have to make up your own mind on this. However, I think it is
a very important decision for you.'
"Finally, after sitting with it for a week, the boy turned
in the same paper, making no changes at all. He stated, `You can
keep the F and I'll keep my dream.'"
Monty then turned to the assembled group and said, "I tell
you this story because you are sitting in my 4,000-square-foot
house in the middle of my 200-acre horse ranch. I still have that
school paper framed over the fireplace." He added, "The best part
of the story is that two summers ago that same schoolteacher
brought 30 kids to camp out on my ranch for a week." When the
teacher was leaving, he said, `Look, Monty, I can tell you this
now. When I was your teacher, I was something of a dream stealer.
During those years I stole a lot of kids' dreams. Fortunately you
had enough gumption not to give up on yours.'"
Don't let anyone steal your dreams. Follow your heart, no
matter what.
By Jack Canfield
from Chicken Soup for the Soul
Copyright 1993 by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen
Who You Are Makes a Difference
One night a man came home to his 14-year-old son and sat him
down. He said, "The most incredible thing happened to me today. I
was in my office and one of the junior executives came in and he
told me that he admired me and gave me a blue ribbon for being a
creative genius. Imagine. He thinks I am a creative genius. Then
he put this blue ribbon that says `Who I am makes a difference'
on my jacket above my heart. Then he gave me an extra ribbon and
asked me to find somebody else to honor. As I was driving home
tonight, I started thinking about whom I would honor with this
ribbon and I thought about you. I want to honor you.
"My days are really hectic, and when I come home, I don't
pay a lot of attention to you. Sometimes I scream at you for not
getting enough good grades in school and for your bedroom being a
mess, but somehow tonight, I just wanted to sit here and, well,
just let you know that you do make a difference to me. Besides
your mother, you are the most important person in my life. You're
a great kid and I love you!"
The startled boy started to sob and sob, and he couldn't
stop crying. His whole body shook, and he looked up at his father
and said, through his broken tears, "I was planning on committing
suicide tomorrow, Dad, because I didn't think you loved me. Now I
don't need to do that."
By Helice Bridges
from Condensed Chicken Soup for the Soul
Copyright 1996 by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen &
Patty Hansen
One for the Team
This story was told by an old priest one Sunday. It is a
true story of when he served in the military.
One day their drill sergeant came out and threw a hand
grenade into a group of young soldiers. The men all ran away and
took cover away from the grenade. Then the drill sergeant told
them that the grenade was not set to explode and he just did it
to see their reaction. The next day a newly recruited soldier
joined the group. The drill sergeant told the other soldiers not
to tell the new soldier what was going to happen. As the drill
sergeant came out and threw the grenade into the crowd of
soldiers, the new soldier, not knowing it wasn't going to
explode, threw himself on top of the grenade to prevent it from
killing the other men. He was willing to die for his fellow
soldiers.
That year the young man was awarded the only medal for
courage and bravery that had not been won during battle.
By Kim Noone
from A Cup of Chicken Soup for the Soul
Copyright 1996 by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen
& Barry Spilchuk
Shoes
As Gandhi stepped aboard a train one day, one of his shoes
slipped off and landed on the track. He was unable to retrieve it
as the train was moving. To the amazement of his companions,
Gandhi calmly took off his other shoe and threw it back along the
track to land close to the first. Asked by a fellow passenger why
he did so, Gandhi smiled. "The poor man who finds the shoes lying
on the track," he replied, "will now have a pair he can use."
By Source Unknown
First quoted in The Little Brown Book of Anecdotes
from Condensed Chicken Soup for the Soul
Copyright 1996 by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor
Hansen & Patty Hansen
Please Listen
When I ask you to listen to me
and you start giving me advice,
you have not done what I asked.
When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why
I shouldn't feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something
to solve my problem,
you have failed me,
strange as that may seem.
Listen! All I ask is that you listen.
Don't talk or do - just hear me.
Advice is cheap; 20 cents will get
you both Dear Abby and Billy Graham
in the same newspaper.
And I can do for myself; I am not helpless.
Maybe discouraged and faltering,
but not helpless.
When you do something for me that I can
and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and
inadequacy.
But when you accept as a simple fact
that I feel what I feel,
no matter how irrational,
then I can stop trying to convince
you and get about this business
of understanding what's behind
this irrational feeling.
And when that's clear, the answers are
obvious and I don't need advice.
Irrational feelings make sense when
we understand what's behind them.
Perhaps that's why prayer works, sometimes,
for some people - because God is mute,
and he doesn't give advice or try
to fix things.
God just listens and lets you work
it out for yourself.
So please listen, and just hear me.
And if you want to talk, wait a minute
for your turn - and I will listen to you.
by Author Unknown
from Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul
Copyright 1997 by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor
Hansen, and Kimberly Kirberger
