Face.the.music...
"Face the music..."
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The car horn was loud, and I dreaded the moment walking out to that car. I ran down the stairs, took a deep breath, and opened the door. Taylor was sitting in the jeep, yelling at Jake to get into the back seat so I could sit next to him. He looked at me and waved. He was so cute; I was so lucky to have him. If he only knew, he would hate me though. I saw Mike in the back. I jumped into the car, smiling, and saying hi.
Mike smiled, "What's up?" I couldn't believe it, what was he doing? Did he not know what he did to me? Of course he knew, we both did it. I gave him a look, but didn't want to lead anything on, and threw on a little fake smile. The drive to the lake was a bunch of music, and pointless guy talk. We pulled in, and appeared to be the last ones there. Zac was already flying off the homemade rope swing, and yelling as he dropped into the water. Isaac was sitting on the doc, talking to "the new girl." I was pretty sure it was the same girl from the party. I was beginning to be happy I came, I saw Mrs. Hanson smile at me, and I waved. I started to walk over, before Taylor grabbed my arm. I looked his way, and he gave me an evil grin. I hated that grin, I knew something was about to happen.
"Taylor... what... don't give me that look, oh no you don't..." I started in protest, but he had already grabbed me and was steadily pulling me towards the dock. I knew what was coming. "Taylor, if you do-" Too late, he threw me into the water, but not before I grabbed him in with me. We were both laughing, and he pulled me into a small kiss. I panicked, and not really knowing why. Just his arms near brought back other thoughts, I couldn't take it. I pulled away, and got out. He kinda sank in, but perked up quickly, he didn't want anyone to notice what had just happened between us any more than I did. Mike and Jake jumped in, and all the guys swam around, flipping off the raft, trying to out do each other.
I sat contently in the sun, staying away from everyone, getting some quiet. I didn't let thoughts sink too far in, I knew where my mind would end up. That night.
I walked over to Mrs. Hanson, to talk to her, and see how everything was doing. "Hi," I smiled, and helped her prepare some food for everyone. Mr. Hanson was over at the grill, cooking up some hot dogs and hamburgers.
"Hi Hun. How's everything? You haven't been around the house the past couple of days. Taylor said you weren't feelin well. You ok now?" She asked, sounding so much like the mother she was.
"Yea, I'm good. I must've just eaten something bad. But, it's all gone now. Its such a beautiful day..." I trailed off.
"Yes, it's nice. Supper should be ready in a few minutes, why don't you get the boys out of the water. Have you met Nicole yet? Isaac seems to have somethin for her. You guys would get along great, she's about the same age as you."
"Ok, sounds great. I'll go get them."
I walked over to the shore, and yelled out to the raft. "C'mon guys, its time to eat. Out of the water..." They all began jumping off, and racing towards the shore. Taylor was out of the water first, I handed him his towel. He grabbed it, but kept on walking. I must have been kinda hurt with what I did earlier. I shrugged, what was I suppose to do. Tell him everything. He would hate me. I could see it. Taylor, something really did happen at that party. Please don't hate me, I'm so sorry. Its all my fault, I must have given him the wrong idea. I must have caused this. That's when Taylor would walk away, and never talk to me again. Mike was right, it was my fault. I must have led him on, but I said no. I told Mike no, and he did it anyway. He was going to be in trouble. He was wrong, not me... I hope.
I grabbed some food, and walked over to where Nicole and Isaac were sitting. Obviously Taylor didnt want me with him at the picnic table. Isaac smiled, and scooted over to give me some room on the blanket. "Hey, I'm Julie. You must be Nicole, Mrs. Hanson told me about you. Where do you go to school? I don't think I have see you at Union High, in Tulsa?" She was really pretty, and Isaac closely watched her every word as she talked to me. I could tell he really did "have somethin" for her. I was happy for him, him and Becca breaking up had really hurt them, and it was about time they had moved on.
"Yea. I don't go to Union. I go to Smith. I've always gone, ugh, I actually don't mind it though. It's not as bad as people make it out to be." She smiled, and poked at her salad. Smith was an all girls private school. Most of the girls I had met from there were huge snobs, and we all thought it pretty much sucked to go there. No guys. But, it was every guys dream.
"Whoa. That's cool. The only girls I have met from Smith were--" I started to stop, I didn't want to insult her, I was glad when she interrupted me.
"I know, snobs, little rich daddy's girls. Believe me, there are more than enough there. Don't worry. I'm not, and I hang out with some friends who aren't either. Hey, you want to hang out with us sometime? We could all do something. You would fit right in." She asked, smiling.
"Sounds great. I'll have Isaac give you my number, and whenever you guys want, give me a call. I think I'll go throw this away, I'm not that hungry." I sat up, and walked over to the table. I tossed my food away, and sat down at my towel again, trying to catch some more sun.
The rest of day was a lot quieter than usual, I pretty much avoided Taylor, and I could tell he knew. We were packing up, standing behind the jeep. Taylor whispered to me, "want to go out tonight? We can get something to eat. Or whatever..." he looked into my eyes, I hated when he could read me. Something was wrong, and he knew it.
"I don't know Taylor, I'm kinda tired, I want some sleep. How about some other time?" I looked over, and he was looking into me with those eyes. Those liquid blue eyes I had grown to love. To read back.
"Please? We didn't really get much time alone today. You've been sick, I've missed you. We could talk a bit..."
I gave in. "I guess." I tried to put in a small smile, but he had already changed his attention to the guys jumping into the back. I climbed into the front, as he started up the jeep.
"Hey Tay, lets stop off to get some food. I'm starving!" Mike said, sitting in the seat behind me.
"What?! We just ate a little while ago. You guys are going home, I'm dropping you off." He said, smiling, and glancing my way.
"Aw, c'mon." Alex added in. "Lets just go get somethin to eat. We always do after the lake. Why change now?"
Taylor looked at me again, as if wanting to know what I wanted to do. I nodded, and smiled. What was I suppose to do, come out and say no? Ugh, this was great. 5 more minutes with Mike, and I thought I would throw up, and now I was going to have to go through a whole meal with them at the same table.
"Fine, how about Markin's?" Taylor asked, and was followed by sounds of agreement.
Great, now I was going to be in a restaurant with ALL of the guys. Taylor, Mike, Alex, Ryan, John, and Adam. Fun. Ryan, John, and Adam got into their car, ready to follow us out of the driveway.
Taylor yelled to his mom that we were going out, noting that he would be back by 1 that night. She did the motherly interrogation, and told him to be careful. I leaned against the door, trying to surpress a sigh. Just as we were getting ready to pull out, Isaac walked over to the car.
"Hey Jules, you goin with them? I'll drive you home of you want."
He was a lifesaver. I looked over at Taylor, to see what he thought of that. He just stared blankly at me. I knew he wanted to go out tonight, but I couldn't take it, not with Mike there.
"Um, yea, I think I'll take that ride home, thanks." Taylor looked at me disappointedly. I didn't really want to hurt his feelings, he really wanted to go out that night.
I felt bad right then. I grabbed his hand. "We can still go out tonight. I'll go take a shower, and you can pick me up after you guys eat. We'll go to a movie or somethin, how's that?" He perked up a little, happy with the plan.
"Ok, sure. I'll pick you up in a few hours." He smiled, as I opened the car door. I walked with Isaac to his car, I could hear Mike yell after me. "Aw Julie, you aren't coming with us?! Man, we need the girl there! What's Tay gonna do with outcha?" Taylor jokingly hit him, and they were all laughing. I kept walking, and rolled my eyes. I thought I saw Isaac looking at me, but he didn't say anything. I looked at him, and he just smiled. I knew him too well, almost as much as Taylor. Isaac wanted to say something, I could tell, but he just opened the door for me, and I got in. The drive home was quiet, I listened to Nicole and Isaac joke around about little things. We pulled up to my house. I mumbled a thanks, and got out.
About two hours later, I heard the car pull up. I was just getting dressed, when my mom called me downstairs. I walked down to see Taylor making himself comfortable in the living room with my parents. His feet were perfectly propped up on our coffee table. Both him and my father sat intensly watching a baseball game. They loved him, no doubt about it. Just like Mike. Ugh.
"You all set?" Taylor asked, standing up.
"Yup, lets go." I said, turning to walk to the door. "I'll be back later tonight. Bye." We walked outside, it was a lot cooler than this afternoon.
"What's playing tonight?" Taylor asked, as we got into the jeep, and he started driving down the street.
"I don't really know, I didn't even check. I guess we can just go, and see if there's anything good." I commented.
"Sounds good to me." Taylor said, before turning the radio on. The car was filled with music from a local college radio station; we didn't really talk much. He pulled into the packed parking lot, and we got out. He grabbed my hand, and we started walking towards the cinemas.
"You know what? I think the cool Halloween movie is playing, how about that?" He said, as we walked through the doors.
"Yea, sure." I said, smiling. I was just glad he didn't want to see some boring movie, cause then we would do more than just watch it. Not that I liked to really get into it in the theater. This movie, he would at least be interested in. Good. I just didn't want to have to think about it, and all that happened. I had always loved when Taylor put his arms around me, it was always so warm and loving, but when he got near me now, all I could think about was Mike, and his arms. I didn't want any arms around me, especially after what had happened.
Taylor bought the tickets, and I grabbed a diet coke. We walked into the movie, and found two seats. It was fairly empty, but we were 20 minutes early. It slowly started to fill, and Isaac and Nicole walked in. They spotted us, and walked over. Nicole took the seat next to me, and Isaac next to her.
"Hey, you guys planned on seeing a movie tonight too, huh?" Nicole said smiling, "That's cool, this is suppose to be really scary..."
"Yea, I know. It should be really cool. I love these kinda movies. You can't beat Scream though, now that was a classic." Taylor said, staring at the screen, and the trivia questions he had learned to memorize.
The lights went dim, and the movie started. It was good for about an hour, before everything seemed as unrealistic as the last 5 Halloween movie, and Taylor got bored. Trying to seem innocent, knowing his brother was 2 seats away, he put his arm around me, and proceeded to kiss my neck. I wanted to scream inside, I hated any arms around me. I started to wriggle a little bit. Taylor seemed to think it was because I always hated it when he wanted to do this public.
"Its ok," he whispered in my ear. "Isaac isn't even watching, everyone seems to be into the movie." I knew he wanted some reaction, but I couldn't.
"Taylor, no I cant. OK?" I pleaded, but he didn't listen. I needed to get out for awhile, "Listen, I'm going to the bathroom, I'll be back in a few minutes." I got up, Taylor looked kinda hurt, but at that moment, I didn't care. I just had to get away, before the tears started to come, and I was thinking about that night again.
To Love You
Email: writerjul@hotmail.com
