--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
QUI ME AMAT, AMAT ET CANEM MEAM
Love me, love my dog.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SI HOC NON LEGERE POTES TU ASINUS ES
If you can't read this, you're an ass. (asinus also means "idiot")
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TUA MATER TAM ANTIQUIOR UT LINGUAM LATINE LOQUATUR
Your mother is so old she speaks Latin
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MONSTRA MIHI PECUNIAM
Show me the money.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
LUKE SUM IPSE PATREM TE
Luke, I am your father.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
POTESTATEM OBSCURI LATERIS NESCIS
You don't know the power of the dark side.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SIT VIS VOBISCUM
May the Force be with you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IRE FORTITER QUO NEMO ANTE IIT
To boldly go where no man has gone before.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MAGNUS FRATER SPECTAT TE
Big Brother is watching you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CREDO ELVEM IPSUM ETAIM VIVERE
I think Elvis is still alive.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FUTUE TE ET IPSUM CABALLUM
Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The beginning of Catullus 16:
PEDICABO EGO VOS ET IRRUMABO
I will fuck you in the ass, and have you give me some good head.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IMPUDENS ES LENO
Bastard! (really "You shameless pimp" and it's a real insult)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SPUCATUM TAURI
bull shit
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PERITE
Fuck off! (really "go through (to the netherworld)")
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CAVE CANEM
Beware of the dog
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
QUANDO OMNI FLUNKUS MORITATUS
When all else fails play dead.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NIL ILLEGITIMUS CARBORUNDUM
Don't let the bastards get you down.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CATAPULTAM HABEO. NISI PECUNIAM OMNEM MIHI DABIS, AD CAPUT TUUM SAXUM IMMANE MITTAM
I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CONFACIMUS NAVEGEMUS
Fuck it -- let's go sailing.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NON RAPE ME SI PLACET
Please don't rob me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MEI CAPILLI SUNT FLAGRANTES
My hair is on fire
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SUNTNE VACCI LAETI
Are your cows happy?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TU STUPIDUS ES
You are dumb.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MEUM CEREBRUM NOCET
My brain hurts.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CRAPULAM TERRIBLEM HABEO
I have a terrible hangover.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SUPPEDISNE
Did you fart quietly?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TUA TOGA SUSPINA EST
Your toga is backwards
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CUR ETIAM HIC ES
Why are you still here?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NULLUM GRATUITUM PRANDIUM
There is no free lunch.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HIC PUER EST STULTISSIMUS OMNIUM
This boy is the stupidest of all!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VAH! DENUONE LATINE LOQUEBAR? ME INEPTUM. INTERDUM MODO ELABITUR.
Oh! Was I speaking Latin again? Silly me. Sometimes it just sort of slips pout.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FELES MALA! CUR CISTA NON UTERIS? STRAMENTUM NOVUM IN EA POSUI.
Bad kitty! Why don't you use the cat box? I put new litter in it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(at a barbeque)
ANIMADVERTISTINE, UBICUMQUE STES, FUMUM RECTA IN FACIEM FERRI?
Ever noticed how wherever you stand, the smoke goes right into your face?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HOCINE BIBO AUT IN EUM DIGITOS INSERO?
Do I drink this or stick my fingers in it?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IMUS AD MAGUM OZI VIDENDUM, MAGUM OZI MIRUM MIRISSIMUM.
We are going to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SOLUM POTESTIS PROHIBERE IGNES SILVARUM
Only you can prevent forest fires.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CLAMO, CLAMATIS, OMNES CLAMAMUS PRO GLACE LACTIS
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VACCA STULTA
Stupid cow
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
UTINAM LOGICA FALSA TUAM PHILOSOPHIAM TOTAL SUFFODIANT!
May faulty logic undermine your entire philosophy!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
UTINAM BARBARI SPATIUM PROSPRIUM TUUM INVADANT!
May barbarians invade your personal space!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MACDONALDUS SENEX FUNDUM HABET. E-I-E-I-O. ET IN HOC FUNDO, NONNULLAS BOVES DOMESTICAS HABET. E-I-E-I-O. CUM MOO MOO HIC, CUM MOO MOO IBI. HIC UNA MOO, IBI UNA MOO, UBIQUE UNA MOO MOO. MACDONALDUS SENEX FUNDUM HABET. E-I-E-I-O.
Old MacDonald has a farm. E-I-E-I-O. And on this farm, he has some cows. E-I-E-I-O. With a moo moo here, with a moo moo there. Here a moo, there a moo, everywhere a moo moo. Old MacDonald has a farm. E-I-E-I-O.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
UBI SUNT PORCI QUOQUOMODO?
Where are the pigs already?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DEMUM VENIUNT PORCI.
At last, here come the pigs.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NON PLAUDITE. MODO PECUNIAM JACITE.
Don't applaud. Just throw money.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PLUS! PERGE! AIO! HUI! HEM!
More! Go on! Yes! Ooh! Ummm!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TE PRECOR DUNCISSIME SUPPLEX!
Pretty please with cherry on top!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MAGISTER MUNDI SUM!
I am the Master of the Universe!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FACME COCLEARIO VOMERE!
Gag me with a spoon!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VESCERE BRACIS MEIS!
Eat my shorts!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DI! ECCE HORA! UXOR MEA ME NECABIT!
God, look at the time! My wife will kill me!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ESTNE VOLUMEN IN TOGA, AN SOLUM TIBI LIBET ME VIDERE?
Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just glad to see me?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CUM CATAPULTAE PROSCRIPTAE ERUNT TUM SOLI PROSCRIPT CATAPULTAS HABEBUNT.
When catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TE AUDIRE NO POSSUM. MUSA SAPIENTUM FIXA EST IN AURE.
I can't hear you. I have a banana in my ear.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SENTIO ALIQUOS TOGATOS CONTRA ME CONSPIRARE.
I think some people in togas are plotting against me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ANTIQUIS TEMPORIBUS, NATI TIBI SIMILES IN RUPIBUS VENTOSISSIMIS EXPONEBANTUR AD NECEM.
In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CAESAR SI VIVERET, AD REMUM DARERIS.
If Ceasar were alive, you'd be chained to an oar.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
QUANTUM MATERIAE MATERIETUR MARMOTA MONAX SI MARMOTA MONAX MATERIAM POSSIT MATERIARI?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DUCATOR MEUS NIHIL AGIT SINE LAGUNCULAE LEYNIDAE ACCEDUNT.
My calculator does not work without batteries.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NIHIL CURO DE ISTA TUA STULTA SUPERSTITIONE.
I'm not interested in your dopey religious cult.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ROMANI QUIDEM ARTEM AMATORIAM INVENERUNT.
You know, the Romans invented the art of love.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NEUTIQUAM ERRO.
I am not lost.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------