Everything you ever wanted to know, and a bit beyond that...
What we're trying to accomplish - a new concept in web design
I can only really speak for myself and not for Kristen, but my idea of the perfect webpage is the blend of farce and seriousness. A page that can cut from a deep, personal allegory, to one of utter nonsense, with as seamless a transition as possible. The goal is not to confuse, but to amuse and then spark interest. I'm unsure how many visitors such a page would garner, but if you did happen to stop by, we would appreciate your feedback. This is a site designed to make you think, both in nonsense and in sense. Thanks.
~Dave dwininger@mail.colgate.edu
Enter: The Turtle
The Turtle embodies this new concept perfectly, for it itself is based in both the worlds of gibberish and sense. Now, this is probably the time to insert the fact that I have nothing against religions of any sort, I actually have a profound respect for anyone to have faith, to believe in something when many are against you, and to stand against persecution. I do, however, have a problem when others attempt to force their beliefs upon others.
The Holy Turtle was originally created to combat such a situation. I've found that some people feel it's their duty to "show you the light," if it appears you have no denomination. So, when someone repeatedly needled me about beliefs, I eventually told them. "I believe in the Holy Turtle, and you too will believe on Judgement Day when you are brought before His mighty shell." This for some reason did not elicit a positive response. And it basically snowballed from there. We really only have two official members in the CotHT, and we really don't need any others to join up. The worship of The Turtle is an independent one, mixed with a great deal of introspection, and a solid dose of insanity.
Ok, it started out as nonsense, and if you visit the commandments page, you will probably think no different. There is basis in mythology to support The Turtle's existence, however. In antiquity, the world was believed to be resting on a giant turtle's back, and as It toils all day to support us, It can support us in our daily lives. On another slightly more serious note, the shell is also metaphoric, and can be seen as similar to the concept of a "mask" or also just as a place to get away. Not neccessarily for isolation purposes, but as a place for solitude and quiet...which can lead to peace of mind if you allow it to. Why a Turtle?
Well, it's our idea, for one. Also, at college I accidently founded the Church of the Potato, and in fact am referred to as the "Potato Prophet" in some early potato scripture. This was seen as blasphemous in the eyes of Kristen, who is currently one of the highest ranking officials in the CotHT, namely the Saint of the Spork. In order to atone for my transgressions, and distance myself from my past association with the Starch-based Savior, I have designed this webpage. This is not just a testament to the glory of The Turtle, but also an additional creative outlet on the web (for me, it is her first). Why Us?
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