I never went to college,
I never went to school
But when it comes to boogie
I'm an educated fool.

I went to the river
And couldn't get across,
Paid five dollars
For and old gray hoss.

The horse wouldn't pull
So I dreaded for a bull;

The bull wouldn't holler,
So I traded for a dollar;

The dollar wouldn't pass
So I threwed it in the grass;

The grass wouldn't grow,
So I traded for a hoe;

The hoe wouldn't dig
So I traded for a pig;

The pig wouldn't squeal,
So I traded for a wheel;

The whell wouldn't run,
So I traded for a gun;

The gun wouldn't shoot,
So I traded for a boot;

The boot wouldn't fit
So I thought I'd better quit.