I started watching The 700 Club around a year ago and I find it to be pretty damn entertaining. It's always important to know your enemy, and plus one of the news anchor girls or whatever is pretty hot I think. Although I always get pissed off at some of the ridiculous shit they say. Like when they were discussing video games and music and said modern American culture was "obsessed with death"...hmm, pretty funny coming from someone that worships a dead man hanging by nails! I've also seen them do a silly report on "Gothic culture" (although one girl that was being interviewed dug the Damned!) and they randomly ran an Anti-NIN advertisement a few weeks ago (they just showed clips from "Head Like A Hole" and flashed lyrics to "Heresy", oooo dangerous). Anyway, this is where I'll be doing highlights of 700 Club episodes. Yay!!
7/19/01
-A report on global warming was included, but I wasn't really paying attention, I was running all over the house looking for patches. But from what I heard of it there was a lot of George W. ass kissing involved (of course)
-A "rebellious teen" who miraculously changed her whole entire lifestyle after being exposed to an episode of the 700 Club. If this story is true, it's sad that people can be this fucking weak minded.
-A teen evangalist who leads Teen Mania Ministries, who is planning some sort of giant Christian teen rally. High hopes for "invading this generation with the Gospel". Yes, I am going to kick his ass..
-It should also be noted that the sexy reporter/co-host Lisa Ryan is back!
7/18/01
-A report on the tarnished FBI image. Talking about Waco, Ruby Ridge, etc., nothing we haven't heard before on every single real news station. Stop trying to do legit. news stories!
-The next segment of the show was a lot more interesting, concerning Palestinian television. It showed a commercial which broadcasted on Palestinian television glorifying martyrdom. Strange that the 700 Club had a problem with this, as their entire religion is based around somebody who willingly sacrificed their own life. But whatever. There were some pretty wild scenes of Palestinian children frantically screaming at the camera. And more scenes of children training for a suicide squad.
-A bizarre and hilarious music video of Jesus carrying a gigantic cross throughout a city of some sort. Some people he passed included ganstas, homeless people, and sexy vietnamese girls in strange hats.
7/17/01
-The main story concerns a "spiritual revival" in England, and showed some Christian festival with all these dorks praying in a 24/7 prayer tent. The 700 Club is broadcasted throughout Europe, and claim that Europeans are "hungry and desperate to hear the message". Sorry, but the average European is way smarter than the average American, and clearly most of them won't buy that bullshit. When they were interviewing random people on the street, none of them gave two fucks about Christianity...
-The rest of the show was just pleading for money. Typical money hungry Christians, I suppose.
7/9/01
-Pat Robertson begins going on and on about his trip to Israel. Sorry, but unless he took out some Muslims I'm not interested. Fuck...I'm just kidding! So I block it out by blasting "Show No Mercy" of course!
-A special on nuclear power and how important it is for the future. It concluded with Pat Robertson complaining because the only reason why nuclear power is expensive at this moment is due to government regulation. Cunt.
-A tribute to a mentally unstable religious fanatic Dr. Bill Bright, who continuously referred to himself as " a Slave for Christ". This dangers occult leader has been spreading Christian propaganda for 50 years or so, sending the word to all sorts of loser countries and such.
-A story about a girl who was "healed" because the 700 Club prayed for her. The 700 Club then proceeded to read false testimonies of more healings, and then went on a whine session of prayer.
-"Church of the week" installment was some church in some fucking loser redneck state (of course) that involves skateboarding or something. I guess there are strict laws against public skating there, so the local church saw it as an oppurtunity to lure children (especially young boys, knowing priests) into their grip. I bet they listened to Narnia, Stryper, and MxPx while they skateboard..fags
