Xander turned over in his steep, happily mumbling to himself. A voice, smooth and soft, interrupted his dream.

"Xander."

Xander's grin widened as his mumblings changed to include the word 'Buffy'. The smooth voice spoke again.

"Xander." It became more insistent. "Xander!"

Xander jerked up, suddenly fully awake.

"Wha'? Huh?" He looked suspiciously around the room. "Someone better be here, or I'm going to feel really stupid," he said out loud, slightly worried. Luckily, the figure of a heavily built man stepped into the light of the window, and smiled apologetically.

"Ahhh!" Xander screeched suddenly. He paused and cocked his head. "You're not Buffy. Thought it really worries me that I mistook you for her, 'cause it's not like you even sound alike. Or look alike. Or..."

"Xander!" The man interrupted the boy's ramblings. "Calm down. It's just me."

"I know it's just you, Angel," replied Xander. "Who else do I know that looks like a walking wall?"

Angel's bottom lip began to quiver, and Xander, realising his mistake, quickly jumped out of bed and went over to comfort the self-conscious vampire.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he quickly apologised. "I didn't mean it as an insult." He smiled encouragingly. "You might be a walking wall, but you're my walking wall." He stroked the vampire's hair soothingly, and gently directed them both over to his bed.

"Now tell me why exactly you're in my room at two o'clock in the morning." 

Xander paused and played back what he had just said, after noticing the cheeky grin that was slowly spreading over Angel's face. "Oh," he continued, poker-faced. "Well...I meant why are you just coming into my room at two o'clock in the morning, rather than the usual where you've been here already for hours, and we are happily snuggled in bed?"

Angel's eyes glazed over momentarily at the memory of his previous visits to Xander's bedroom. He then silently thanked the gods that his permanently pale vampire skin meant that he couldn't blush.

"Ummmmm...," he finally replied, looking slightly sheepish. "I was just over in Buffy's bedroom..."

"What?!" exploded Xander, in a fit of jealousy and disbelief. "You better choose your next words very carefully, buddy, or no more nighttime visits to this bedroom. I do have some pride, you know."

Angel quickly spurted out his explanation, though he doubted Xander's threat was serious.

"I didn't mean it like that. I just went to tell her that I missed her...and she snubbed me off so I left. That's all. You know she means nothing to me."

Xander gave him a pitiful look.

"Oh, Angel," he said disapprovingly. "You're not still pretending to like Buffy, are you? Please! It's not like her ego doesn't get enough pampering with the whole: 'I'm the slayer, hear me roar' thing."

Angel was about to defend himself from the boy's accusations, when suddenly his expression turned to one of disapproval.

"Are you saying that I'm the only one who lets Buffy feel important. Oh, please. Who was the one who was just muttering her name in his sleep? Who still pretends he has a huge crush on her?"

Xander had the sensibility to look slightly sheepish.

"Well...You know we all used to have to do it, to make her feel like less of an outcast because of this whole vampire thing - no offence intended - but, you know...it's a hard act to break."

He stared defensively at the vampire, until he forgot what he was being defensive about.

"Ummmm..." He giggled nervously. "Did you come here just to discuss Buffy, or did you come here to...you know." He gave the vampire a shy grin.

Angel responded by giving him a full-blown seductive stare.

"What do you think?" he purred.

Xander gulped. 

The vampire moved slowly closer to Xander, as they both leaned back into the mattress behind. Suddenly a stone came hurtling through the window, missing Xander's head by an inch.

"Ahhhh!!" he screamed, throwing the vampire on top of himself.

"Oh, Xander...," Angel said with a cheeky grin. His expression then changed to one of shocked insult. "Hey! You only did that so you wouldn't get hit again if another stone came, didn't you?" he accused the boy.

"No I didn't," said Xander a little too quickly.

"You did too!"

"Ummm...OK I did."

Angel looked at him, not sure whether to be hurt or angry. Xander quickly began another blabbering attack.

"No! You don't understand. I have logic. I thought that if I got hit by a stone, then it could do some serious, permanent damage, you know. But if you got hit by a stone, then you'll just heal instantly, anyway. See?"

Angel looked at him, angry now that the boy had some logic to his argument, much to the vampire's disappointment. He had so wanted something to brood over.

"Doesn't mean it doesn't hurt," he mumbled sulkily, then suddenly realised he should check to see who threw the stone. Xander had the same idea at the same time, and they both rose and made it two steps to the window, before the figure of a girl jumped though and landed in front of them.

"Oh, no," they both whispered simultaneously.

"Ah. Hi. Buffy," Xander said, confused. He turned and looked from Angel to Buffy. "What is this? Is my bedroom suddenly the designated meeting place of vampire and slayer?" He paused, suddenly shocked. "Oh, no! This isn't the new hellmouth is it? NO! Not my bedroom!" 
He threw himself down on his bed in shock, checking quickly for any suspicious tentacles emerging from underneath. Buffy and Angel exchanged glances as they tried to decipher Xander's logic - unsuccessfully.

"Where does he get his train of thought from?" whispered Buffy to Angel, obviously having forgotten the fact that she had just ignored him when she last saw him in her bedroom. Angel just shot her a exasperated look, and shrugged his shoulders.

"You're the slayer. You deal all the time with the paranormal." He paused and looked to Xander. "And I definitely catagorise his mind under paranormal."

Buffy nodded her agreement, and then turned to Xander.

"Look, Xander. One: Your bedroom isn't the hellmouth, so you can stop worrying. Two: I suppose I should apologise from throwing the stone through the window." She shrugged her shoulders. "I guess I don't know my own strength."

Xander and Angel exchanged glances again, and the boy mouthed the words: 'Huge ego' to the vampire.

"Hey, Angel," said Buffy suddenly, with a tilt of her head. "What exactly are you doing in Xander's bedroom, anyway?"

Xander started to go a slight shade of pink, but Angel just looked at the slayer calmly.

"I was in your bedroom, too You didn't question that," he replied with a raise of an eyebrow. Buffy took the hint, and realised she was going to lose the argument if she continued on that topic.

"Anyway, boys," she continued on, after shaking her head, "there's some major hellmouth activity going on, so we've all got to get to Giles and his books, pronto. OK?"

"Yep. Sure. Don't mind me. I was just sleeping. People do that at two o'clock in the morning, you know," Xander grumbled, as his made his way to get dressed.

"Yeah, well, sorry," said Buffy just before jumping out of his window. Xander and Angel exchanged another glance.

"Don't worry, my love. I care," said Angel soothingly. "She shouldn't take it out on you, just because she has a problem with thinking about anyone but herself. Or anything else but the slayer thing."

Xander smiled happily, and after he had finished getting dressed, him and Angel made their way towards to window.

"Explain to me why we're climbing out of my window, when there is a perfectly good door downstairs," grumbled Xander.

"Maybe because the perfectly good door, has a perfectly real mother's bedroom right near it, with a perfectly well-hearing mother inside."

"Ah. That'd do it," replied Xander, and quickly jumped out of the window, and made his way to the grass below.

"Ahhh!" Xander screeched, as he rose from the final jump down to find the vampire standing an inch away from him. "Would you stop doing that! Jeez! And I thought Buffy shows off!"

"Sorry. Hard habit to break," he replied, mimicking the boy's earlier words. 

"Touche," said Xander, and they began walking towards the direction of the school. After a while Xander apparently reached a decision in his thoughts.

"I probably would."

"What?" asked Angel, looking slightly guilty that maybe he hadn't been listening to what Xander had been saying before that.

"If I had supernatural powers...like you, I mean...I'd probably use them to show off, too," explained the boy. 

"But, Xander, I didn't move supernaturally fast out of the window just to show off. It's just how I do things," protested the vampire.

"Yeah, whatever."

"No, really, I didn't"

"I believe you."

"No you don't."

ander turned to Angel, with a penetrating stare,

"I. Believe. You. OK?"

Angel knew better than to argue with a fragmented sentence, so just nodded and walked ahead, contemplating pulling an impressive brood, just to spite the boy.

Unfortunately for him, he couldn't see Xander behind him, grinning smugly at his successful use of three full stops in a sentence that logically shouldn't have any at all.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the school, Buffy, Willow, and Giles were already gathered around the centre table in the library. In front of them was a huge, leather-bound book that for some reason, Giles, the intellectual genius, couldn't read without using his finger to follow the words.

"Here! Here it is," he pronounced, tapping the line that caught his attention. Buffy and Willow leaned forward to see his discovery.

"Ah. Yes. Very insightful. Thanks for that," said Buffy, while giving Willow a confused look.

"Um, Giles," said Willow carefully. "Not all of us can read Latin, you know. Maybe you should translate it for us."

"Yeah, just give us the gist of it," interrupted Buffy. Willow shot her a 'That's what I just said, thank you very much' look, which Buffy completely failed to notice. "So, Giles, what is it this time," Buffy continued on. "Mutant plants? Possessed microwaves? Or just boring old vampires again," she asked sarcastically.

"Hey!"

Everyone turned around to find Angel standing in the doorway, looking very indignant.

"Oh, sorry," said Buffy quickly, though without much feeling. "No offence intended, of course."

"Of course," mimicked Xander sarcastically, under his breath, after coming up beside the hurt vampire. He subtly wrapped his arm around Angel's back, in a comforting gesture that no one else in the room could see.

It was Giles who broke the heavy silence. 

"Ok, everyone. We have more urgent matters at hand, if you all don't mind."

He turned back to the book in front of him, reading the line of interest once again.

"Yes."

"You'll have to be a little more specific than that," said Xander. "Like: 'Yes - I'm glad I didn't eat that curry for tea or I'd really be regretting it now..."

Everyone gave him The Look. 

"What?"

Angel put his arm around the boy and smiled encouragingly, with his silent way of saying that he thought is was funny even if the rest of them didn't have a sense of humour.

"Back to the book...," prompted Willow. 

"Ah, yes," Giles continued on. "In answer to you previous question, Buffy, it's not mutant plants or possessed microwaves." He pause for dramatic effect. "It's the Master."

"What!" everyone exclaimed.

"I thought we killed him for good, this time," said Buffy. "How could he possibly still be bugging us?"

Giles looked a little embarrassed.

"Ummm...Well there seems to be something that I overlooked."

"Again?" exclaimed Xander. 'Last time you did that a few of us nearly got sacrificed so the Master could live once again. Buffy crushed his bones, remember." 

"Yeah," said Willow. "What could we have possibly missed?"

Giles started fiddling with his glasses until he finally just took them off and placed them on the table.

"It seems that that's not quite good enough. If the Master's skull was not completely destroyed - and I mean by that, completely ground to powder - then his soul still lives, trapped inside the skull. And it can be released, and joined with a new body, so he can continue on living."

"Woah," said Xander. "Yep. That's not good. But Buffy can deal with it, can't she? I mean she just had to get the skull and crush it like you said."

"It's not as simple as that. The skull is missing, which means the Anointed One is probably protecting it."

"You're not telling us something, are you," interrupted Angel suddenly.

Giles looked down momentarily. Suspicious glares greeted him when he looked up once again.

"Ummm...Yes, that's true. I didn't want to say, but I suppose I don't have much choice." He paused to compose his thoughts. "You know how I said that the master can live again if he can find another host body. Well, it can't be a vampire, as their bodies are literally dead, so the transfer won't hold. It has to be a living person. And it has to be someone close to the Slayer, as the effect is somehow more powerful as the energy from the Slayer resides in them, too." He looked around the room morbidly. "That means he will choose either Xander, Willow or me to be the new host for his vampire soul."

Everyone in the room looked at one another, shocked. 

**********

"Welll," said Xander helpfully, breaking the silence. "I suppose that's only expected. I mean, if there's going to be a hideous transpossession of a vampire freak into a mortal's body, then of course it'll be one of us. Always is, have you noticed?"

"Xander," interrupted Giles. "Could you possibly be serious for once? This is a matter of life and death."

"As I said: Always is," replied Xander sulkily, while walking over to a nearby chair. Angel followed him and subtly pulled another chair over close to the boy and sat down as well. 

"Think of it this way," whispered the vampire in the boy's ear. "At least we get to spend all this time together under the pretense of saving the world."

Xander's expression turned to one of mock cheerfulness.

"Oh, yeah, Cool. We now get to spend time together fighting vampires, when if this hadn't happened, we would be back in my bedroom, relating in an entirely different way."

Angel's expression dropped into unhappy shock.

"Oh. You had to put it that way, didn't you," he grumbled.

"Hey, guys," yelled out Willow from across the room. "What are you talking about?"

"Yes, boys," said Giles, who had also noticed their secret conversation. "If you have something to share that'll help us, then say it out loud."

Xander and Angel looked at one another, both looking as though they were unsure whether to be mortally embarrassed, or laugh immaturely. Angel chose the former, and Xander, as predicted, chose the latter. Everyone in the room gave them a confused look.

"We don't have anything to share," mumbled Angel, staring firmly at his feet, while making a spirited attempt at turning a shade of pink, even though his vampire skin shouldn't have allowed it. 

"Yeah," giggled Xander. "I doubt anything we have to say will help you, Giles." He paused and gave the man a quizzical look. "Unless there's something you'd like to share with us, along the lines of 'deep dark secrets'."

His expression was so serious that Angel nearly lost all self control - a sight never seen before - and had to desperately choke and splutter back the laughter threatening to erupt at the mental picture he had developed.

"Ummm...," said Buffy, expressing the thoughts of Giles and Willow effectively. They stared confused at the two boys for a few moments longer, then decided that no further explanation was going to be added which would explain the hilarity of the situation.

"OK," said Giles, gathering everyone's attention. "I suggest we all split up into pairs and try and find the Master's skull. While the Anointed One probably has it, it could well be hidden in an obvious place. Also check for increased vampire activity." He looked around the room. "OK - how about Xander and Angel check the Bronze, Buffy and Willow check the cemetery, and I'll keep researching to see if anything else turns up."

'Yeah, you would," mumbled Xander. "Give us the dangerous jobs, while you sit here in your nice, comfortable, centrally heated library. Thanks a lot."

He rose slowly from his chair, and grabbed the vampire's arm, pulling him along to the door.

"Let's go and face countless evils, Angel," he muttered monotonously, with an Academy award winning display of Complete Lack of Enthusiasm. Angel sighed, still brooding over his misfortune about having to become involved with vampires rather than Xander, and followed the boy out the door. 

* * *

Half an hour later, two figures stood in the silence of the misty, deserted street outside the bronze.

"Well...," announced the younger one, "Wow, I'm glad we came. This was worth it."

"I agree," admitted his taller companion. "Staring at completely uninteresting buildings in the middle of the night has always been a past-time of mine. How about you, Xander?"

"Yep," replied the boy, falling happily into sarcasm. "Love it, in fact. We should do it more often. Very romantic."

They both fell silent once again and continued to stare for another few seconds at the particularly uneventful structure of the nightclub. 

"Well, Angel... Now we've done our part, we have hours to spare before they expect us back. Do you reckon we could sneak off back to my bedroom again and finish what we started?" grinned Xander cheekily, never one to pass up a good opportunity.

"Mmmmm...Oh, I don't know...Let me think...," replied Angel in mock decision.

He stepped closer to the boy, and pulled him into his arms. Xander made a feigned display of being squashed to death in the strength of the vampire's arms, but gave that up when a self-conscious expression greeted him. 

"Oh, Angel," murmured Xander, leaning forward to kiss the vampire on the lips. "You really need to control that embarrassment-complex of yours. I can tell you now - it's a very strange sight to see a hulking, muscle-bound vampire pouting. You know I don't mean anything as an insult." He paused momentarily. "To you, anyway," he added as an afterthought. Hugging the vampire even closer, he leaned forward to align his mouth with Angel's ear.

"You know," he whispered seductively, "Methinks I spot a convenient alleyway which could be taken advantage of at this time, if you get what I mean."

"Don't need to tell me twice," said Angel, and half pulled the boy's arm off in his rush towards the useful shadows of the alley. Barely making it into a secluded corner, Angel began tearing at Xander's clothes, making his intentions very obvious. Xander put up no protest, and began kissing the vampire's neck and face, and running his hands through the slicked hair.

"Oh! I definitely like this alley," Xander moaned into Angel's chest.

"Mmmmm...So do I..."

"Me too."

Xander paused. So did Angel.

"Was that one more agreement than expected, or did I just imagine that?" asked Xander slowly.

"Ummmm...noooo...," replied Angel not breaking eye contact with the boy in a desperate hope that the extra voice would just go away. Finally they both gave in to the inevitable.

They turned simultaneously to see the demented face of a vampire grinning evilly at them.

"Ah!" screeched Xander. Angel responded a little more professionally, relatively speaking.

"Ahhhhhh!" he screamed in frustration, and leapt at the unfortunate younger vampire, with the same force as a reinforced steel wall would have it if went around throwing itself at vampires. In less than two seconds, the young vampire was slammed so violently into the far wall that it exploded into dust at the mere force of impact. Angel punched the floating dust for a few more seconds just to show Xander his frustration. Finally he stopped, and calmed down enough to return slowly to the boy, who quickly entwined his arms around the vampire in an attempt to dispose of any lingering anger. He began stroking Angel's hair and whispering soothing words into his ear, before finally pulling back slightly and looking him in the eyes.

"Um, Angel...Not that I'm complaining...But how is he meant to tell us, or lead us to the master's skull if he's in a million different pieces floating up my nose..." He paused and ran his last comment back through his mind. "Ewwww!...I'm probably breathing him in!....Ewwww!"

Xander made snorting noises in a melodramatic attempt to free vampire pieces from his nasal cavity. Angel looked at him disapprovingly. 

Suddenly a noise in the far shadows of the alley alerted them both to a further interruption.

"Whoever, or whatever you are, I hope you're not stupid enough to want to confront a sexually frustrated vampire, unless of course you have a death wish," yelled Xander, suddenly felling extremely brave now he was in the protection of his own personal psychopathic killing machine. Silence followed this, then another vampire stepped out from the shadows, but wisely didn't move any closer.

"You want the master's skull, do you? Then come with me." The leering vampire beckoned for them to follow, then skulked off into the darkness of the far end of the alley.

Xander and Angel turned to each other.

"Damn, damn, damn, damn!" yelled Xander into the night air. "Could your little buddies possibly have worse timing?!"

"Oh, and I'm sexually frustrated?" mocked Angel disapprovingly. "Hypocrite," he muttered under his breath. "Wellll... I think we know what we have to do now," he sighed.

"Yep. Go back to my bedroom and forget about vampires," said Xander quickly. Angel glared at him. "Woops," spurted out the boy. "Except for you, of course. That's just common sense, not to forget about you," he blabbered on, and Angel quickly clamped a hand over Xander's mouth to stop any further ramblings.

"I forgive you," he reassured quickly. "Well, I think we have a skull to destroy. How about it?"

Turning to Xander, he motioned towards the far end of the alley, where the other vampire had disappeared into.

"Suppose," sulked Xander.

And with that, they set out into what they both knew was a trap.

*************

"The things that I do to please people," sighed Xander martyrdly. "Wow, must I be sent from god." He looked over at Angel with a quirky expression. 'Hey, I'm sent from god, and you're an Angel..." 

He giggled at his clever humour, while Angel just looked at him sadly.

"Yeah, well..." he mumbled slightly put off, "I haven't seen the vampire for at least three blocks now, soooo...I say we turn around and go back to my room..." He looked at Angel hopefully.

"You have a one-track mind, Xander," replied Angel with mock superiority, then quickly sped up ahead of the boy, as he was having trouble controlling his grin.

"Anyway," he yelled over his shoulder. "I can still track the vampire, so we have no reason to give up yet."

Xander pulled a face.

"Oh, yeah. Of course you can. Poor mortal me lost track of the guy ages ago, but you and your supernatural powers can still 'sense' him, can you?"

Angel stopped and waited for the boy to catch up. "Two things, Xander. One: I can't 'sense' him, but I can see in the dark better than you. Two: You're sulking because I won't go back to your bedroom now, aren't you?" He stared at Xander accusingly.

"Are you saying that you don't want to...," purred Xander, in his best seductive voice he could muster. It worked.

"Ahhhhh...Ummmm," Angel gulped, his mind suddenly turning to mush. "Of course...I do...now..."

He stepped forward to Xander, as though in a trance, and made as if to pull him into his arms, but the boy pushed him away.

"No, you don't," he said stubbornly, enjoying having the upper-hand for once. "You reckon that tracking this vampire is more important that going back to my room, so that's what we'll do." 

Angel began a full-scale brood over the unfairness of the situation, but just when he was beginning to enjoy his depression, Xander suddenly yelled a warning, and pushed them both back into the shadows.

"What?" said Angel, desperately trying to ignore his pride that was staring at him from the back of his mind disapprovingly, for cowardly hiding when he could be unnecessarily risking his life against futile odds, like a true testosterone-ruled vampire should.

"I think we just found the inevitable ambush," whispered Xander, clinging to the vampire like a child to its parent. "Angellll....Do something...Use those vampire powers for good rather than evil..."

Angel stared at him with a raised eyebrow. Xander began to feel slightly sheepish.

"Sorry. Don't know where that line just came from...Anyway...Save the day or something, would you...Sweety...My knight in shining armour..." He pulled a pathetically pouty face for full emphasis.

Angel's pride suddenly pushed its way to the front of his mind, and took over from there.

"Yes! Of course, my love. Anything for you," said Angel in a voice that has dropped a few octaves. He threw his broad shoulders back, puffed his chest out, and strutted out to face roughly twenty vampires, with nothing on his side but the overpowering need to impress Xander.

Five minutes passed.

"Ahhhh...Angel..." started Xander tentatively. "I don't think it's going to run away, what with its legs being over the street lamp and dumpster respectively..."

Angel looked up with a deep grunt, and sulkily threw what was left of an unfortunate young vampire away. He strutted back over the boy, grinning proudly.

'Did you see...I ripped his legs off...And the other one I decapitated!...Did you see!...Did you see!"

Xander looked at him encouragingly, knowing better than to question the result of Angel's masculinity. 

"Yes, Angel...I saw...Very good...," he replied carefully, and patted the vampire on the top of his head.

Angel's face broke out into a relieved grin, then suddenly his unusual serious, tortured expression returned.

"I suppose we have to go find the Master's skull now, right?" he asked, his enthusiasm diminishing as quickly as it had come. 

"Mmmm...Yeah, I suppose," shrugged Xander. "You can go ahead if you want, and I'll just follow the body parts you leave behind."

Angel frowned, unsure of whether he was meant to take the boy's comment seriously or not. He decided the former would be more fun, and slunk off ahead to cause some serious bodily harm to any unfortunate vampire in his path. Xander stood with his mouth wide open momentarily, in awe of Angel's ability to be completely oblivious to sarcasm. He finally shook himself, and set off after the inevitable trail of body parts, with a nagging feeling that he was in a seriously warped version of 'Hansel and Gretel'.

"Why can't he use breadcrumbs to mark a path?" he mumbled under his breath. "Normal people would have used breadcrumbs...but I suppose body parts are good enough. Original if nothing else..."

*************

An uneventful fifteen minutes later - if you could call following a trail of various legs, arms, and heads, uneventful - Xander stood in front of an old abandoned warehouse after finally catching up to Angel.

"You know," he said, "is it just me or does this old abandoned warehouse look suspiciously familiar?"

Angel turned from staring at the building. 

"Do you mean familiar in the way that it looks like every other old abandoned warehouse that has ever existed...or do you mean familiar in the way that we've been here before, last time we destroyed the Master's bones?"

Xander cocked his head in thought.

"Yep."

Angel shook his head in confusion, then decided that thinking wasn't what he wanted to do right then, so strode up to the metal door and ripped it off its hinges. 

"Hey! Watch where you throw that thing!"

"Sorry, Xander."

The boy shook his head sadly, and motioned for Angel to go and save the day. He started after the vampire, but suddenly stopped, realising that it would be safer to just wait a few minutes until Angel had dealt with the danger.

'Maybe I should go and help,' he thought. 'Noooo....He'll be better off by himself... Yeah...I'll just get in the way, and he so loves showing off his strength...' 

He paused in his thoughts to contemplate their relationship. 

'Do I do anything? Maybe I should help. Geez! He's always saving my life....I don't deserve him...'

Jumping suddenly back to the world of the conscious, Xander perked up in surprise.

"Oh my God!" he yelled out into the night air. "Now I know why he angsts! It's sooooo easy!" He paused in contemplation. "Kinda fun, too!"

Cheered up no end, Xander almost skipped to the warehouse door, and into its dark interior. A few seconds later a bump could be heard.

"Ahhhhh! Angel! Angel, HELP! I think something just grabbed me!"

A pause followed.

And another, as is so often the case when dealing with Angel's mental process. Finally...

"Ummmm....I know, Xander...It was me..."

Another pause. Then...

"I know... I knew that... Don't be stupid, Angel...," said Xander defensively, roughly pushing the vampire away. "Why can't you turn the lights on when you enter a building anyway? It's not like you're going to fry from exposure to a light globe." He looked at Angel accusingly.

Angel shuffled his feet on the floor, and bowed his head in the beginnings of major embarrassment. After a few seconds, Xander could stand the vampire's discomfort no longer - not because he felt sorry for being mean to him, but because he was beginning to feel embarrassed himself at the sight of a huge, deadly vampire unsuccessfully attempting to control a bad case of blushing.

"Oh, Angel...I'm sorry," he said soothingly, stepping closer and pulling the vampire's huge arms around his waist. "You just wanted mood lighting, didn't you?" he asked as gently as he could. 

Angel nodded, then hid his head in the boy's shoulder.

"Ohhhhhhh....My poor Angel," Xander cooed. "I sorry. I shouldn't have been so insensitive. Will you ever forgive me, my love...my protector...my saviour..."

Angel sniffled dramatically, but Xander's complements had their intended effect, and the vampire rose his head enough to pull a half-hearted attempt at a pout, then wiped his runny nose on his sleeve before smiling shyly.

"Maybe..." he mumbled sulkily, attempting to string the guilt trip out as much as he could. 

Xander caught on to the hint, and an ingenious thought suddenly hit him.

"Hey, Angel..." he said innocently. "If you'd like...You can have a angst over this, if you want...I don't mind..."

Angel perked his head up fully, suddenly forgetting he was meant to be emotionally distraught.

"Really! You're not just saying that, are you?" he asked tentatively.

Xander smiled a little too widely. "Of course not, my love. Anything for you..." He leaned forward to kiss the vampire on the lips. "You can even go somewhere particularly emotionally heart-wrenching, like the graves of all the people you killed back before you changed your ways, just to make a night of it."

"Oh! Xander!" replied Angel ecstatically, hardly believing his luck. "You wouldn't mind..."

"Oh course not," the boy replied, smug that his plan was working so easily. "And you can go on your own, just so you can do the marytyed 'No one Likes Me' thing you do so well..." He then dropped the final part of his plan into place. "And I'll wait back in my bedroom for when you're finished and need some major comforting..."

Angel's expression had celebratory firework's exploding triumphantly behind it, joined by standing ovations.

"Yeeesssss!" he bellowed even more ecstatically than before. Hopping from foot to foot, Angel hugged the boy so tightly that he was in danger of breaking a few ribs.

"Angel! You're killing me!..." wheezed Xander, fighting for breath. "Angel!..."

The vampire controlled himself enough to release the boy, but grabbed hold of him around the waist once again after he had recovered. Swinging Xander off his feet and around in circles, Angel happily yelled his delight over and over again.

"OK! Ok, Angel. Put me down! I mean it - Put. Me. Down."

The fragmented sentence tactic worked again, and Angel reluctantly dropped the boy back to floor level. Xander stood still long enough to stop his head from spinning, then a confused expression covered his face.

"Ummm...Angel...Have we forgotten something? I mean, I've got this nagging feeling that we haven't done something."

Angel looked at him, confused.

"Don't think so. What do you think we've missed?"

Xander cocked his head in thought.

"Let's see...Have you killed, mutilated, and dismembered all the vampires that were in here?

"Check."

"OK...Have you destroyed the master's skull?"

"Che..."

They both looked at each other simultaneously.

"Ahhhh!" Xander yelled. "Kill it! Destroy it! Grind it to dust!" 

He motioned frantically to the skull which lay in the centre of the warehouse, alone on a wooden table. Angel looked at him, confused.

"What's the rush? Why are you so worried?"

Xander looked at him like he was stupid.

"Why am I so worried! There's a skull in the middle of this room which could potentially possess me and turn me into a hideous vampire, and you want to know why I'm worried!" He stood in front of Angel waving his arms melodramatically.

"Oh. Sorry," said Angel, and calmly walked over to the skull and crushed it to pieces with his bare hands. Walking back over to the distraught boy, he curled his arms around him, and cocked his head.

"That OK? You OK now?" he asked, concerned.

Xander nearly exploded.

"Wha? How? Why? Ahhh!" he yelled unhelpfully. "Ohhhh, Angel! I swear you do that deliberately! I mean, sometimes..." 

He left the sentence hanging for emphasis. Unfortunately it went right over the poor vampire's head.

"Ummmm..." said Angel, even more confused than before, and unsure of how to deal with a slightly homicidal Xander. " I think I'll just go and have my angst now, if you don't mind," he started tentatively, desperately hoping that Xander wouldn't take back his previous promise. "You can go back to your room, and I'll be there later to calm you down..."

Xander glared dangerously at him.

"...or to comfort me," spurted out the vampire quickly. He pulled the pout again, to try and direct some of the boy's frustration away from him. It worked.

"Fine, Angel. You can come back to my room, this time. Not that I care if you don't, or anything. But now you've said you're coming, you better be there. No getting carried away with your angst that you lose track of time, or..."

Once again, he left his sentence hanging, and resorted to just shaking his head dangerously. The meaning was effectively conveyed, and Angel quickly planted a kiss on the boy's forehead, and walked quietly out the warehouse, letting the shadows of the night swallow him.

Xander stood still a few moments longer, then finally shrugged his shoulders and let himself enjoy a private grin. Walking slowly to the door, all that could be heard was one sentence being mumbled under the boy's breath:

"Well, it's not like I could let him think I was easy or anything, could I..."


THE END.