Josh
(Mets)
AKA Mondshein, Karl Lover.
"Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I'll never see"
Josh, Josh, Josh. I love ya. I love the fact that you have the worst sense of
humor ever. I love the fact that this sense of humor has been yours since 10th
grade, and hasn't changed one iota. I just wish you could see the big picture
with your FLB team a little more. Sometimes I wonder if that almost league
title could have been the worst thing that happened to you, because most of the
time people win by changing their teams around, not by sitting and waiting.
You’re just too scared sometimes, and I can understand that, but we’ve all got
to get over that. You need to borrow a page from the Scarfos of this league and
start making more trades. But, you already knew that, just as you also know
what everyone's comments are going to be about you.. but that's just it.. you
know what you may need to improbe, but change isn't your thing. You've been
telling me the same Dana Carvey jokes now for over ten years… It’s what makes
you so loveable, and so frustrating.
Here's to change, Josh…
Around the League:
Could possibly win a year if he can pull the trigger on a trade.
Will Josh be upset now that Ken is going to be able to look for free agent
pickups WAY before any of us?
What can I say? It's (almost) impossible to get a deal done with him, and his
"Let me think about it" attitude makes people not want to even try to
get anything done. His hestitancy has cost him on more than one occasion in
getting better deals for himself.
Very nice guy who is a darkhorse for the upcoming season.
He really fucked up that Matt Morris thing.
One of the most emotional owners. Can go from dead set against something to
radically in favor in a matter of minutes. Can be too sensitive sometimes over
very little things
Needs to rely less on the fantasy writein advice and not be so indecisive in
trades. Solid contributor to BB but status would improve w/ more than 1-2
trades per year.
Oddly, and disturbingly quiet this offseason.
Still doesn't get enough credit for his GMing in the year of the ill-fated
Garret Anderson/Marlon Anderson heartbreaking loss, and his poor performance
last year didn't help ... thereby cementing his 2001 finish as a fluke, written
off by almost all.
Last minute addendum: If I may, a VERY poor job of GMing with Matt Morris,
legit stud. He should've immediately traded Morris after nabbing Pedro from my
clutches (when the going rate for aces was considerably higher) ... now he got
Grindley's much-maligned (and rightly-maligned) pigpen of prospects. Not well
done.
Here's the million dollar answer I'm sure you're looking for.....Josh is the
guy who I have no doubt in my mind hates me. He on numerous times has ignored
private messages to him (at least 5 or 6 times) and even in my attempts to make
small talk with him ignores me. On the one occasion that he did respond to a
deal I was trying to make last year, he responded with an answer I thought was
snotty and rude. I have no respect for Josh and think this league would be
better if he were not in it. He's a bad owner who doesn't really seem to care
about his team and I think that he has something against me that I cannot
figure out. Not much bothers me, but he's pissed me off to the point of no
return. When I evaluate possibly making a trade, I won't even look at his team
because I know he's going to blow me off if I try to bring something up. I
really can't stand him, I think his bb posts are stupid and I think he is
definitely one of the worst owners as well as worst people in the league.
One helluva pitching staff (Miller and Wolf are both budding stars, potential
1st/2nd starters on a good team), but I just don't see where he'll get the
offense needed to win. Derek Lee'll have to go off to the tune of 30/30 this
season for him to have a chance. And he should've just accepted my Washburn for
Phillips swap and be done with it. :)
Beerman (Padres)
AKA - John Stephenson.
"It may sound absurd, but don't be naïve"
I wish I could say something about Beerman. I don't know him. I know he trades
a lot. Both his trades and his activity have been erratic. I didn't think he
inherited that bad a team, but now I think he has a lousy one. And that's it.
And I guess that's the point.
Around the League:
While I admire Beerman's willingness to trade with everyone in the league - on
the level of those famous '80s Harry Sinden-Glen Sather fishing trips - I
sometimes wonder whether there's a method, a vision, or a philosophy govering
all his moves. I don't remember exactly when Brent decided daily transactions
were too much for him ... let's say, late May. Projecting a keeper list from
the team Beerman inherited from Brent, whose team would you rather have?:
Brent's keepers (5/27/02):
1B Mike Sweeney $22
3B Phil Nevin $20
CI Richie Sexson $17
OF Magpipes $33
OF Mike Cameron $12
OF Carl Crawford $5
SP Roy Oswalt $23
SP Paul Byrd $10
SP Rodrigo Lopez $10
SP Jake Peavy $5
RP Kelvim Escobar $9 (as well as Carl Crawford and Jake Peavy in the minors)
(he also had bad luck with Bob Wickman and Kevin Millar)
Beerman's projected keeper list, 1/03:
1B SEXSON $17
SS Aurilia $18
3B NEVIN $20
OF LuGo $24
OF Sanchez $10
OF Mench $4
SP Maddux $28
SP Halladay $10
SP Tankersley $4
SP PAUL BYRD $10
RP DeJean $10
Decide for yourselves.
Just plain stupid. Should never have been picked to be in our league. Contract
him….yes.
The epitome of flying by the seat of his pants. Trades wrecklessly on
whims...exact opposite of Josh. Combine the 2 and you'd have a solid roto mind.
Has no true plan for his team.
I think he's a good guy who stepped into a killer position last season.
Unfortunately for him, he's probably listening to a lot of Kimo's opinions and
I think that can't be that great. But a good owner in my opinion and in time I
think can run a good team.
I think he's done nothing positive for his team or the league. His team is
worse [than when he took over] definitely. I don't believe Brent made any
trades, so the team he drafted is the team Beerman took over, so let's see what
he had: sweeney $22, todd walker $4, nevin $20, cabrera $7, magglio $33,
cameron $12, kotsay $7, oswalt $23
That's about it. Guys that you can say are keepers now… they're all gone except
nevin and kotasy (who he reacquired) and he's got helton $41, sexson $17, mench
$4, halladay $10, payton $10. I'd say that's much worse off. He'd be a
candidate for contraction.
Scarfo (Yankees)
AKA - Salary Cap Man.
"Even Heroes have the right to bleed"
I liked this man from the very beginning, and I wasn't even sure why. It's a
vibe thing, I guess. All I know is that during the draft last year every time
he would bid on a guy in the draft I felt the urge to go
"Scarf-OOOoooo". Dunno why. I think I even did it out loud a few
times.
I am a bigger Scarfo fan now, and this time I know why.. He's active on the BB,
he speaks his mind, and, while he gets a little fired up, he doesn't take this
stuff too seriously. So, I can make fun of him, and it's all good. He responds
to emails promptly, and in great detail. Trading with him is a pleasure because
nothing is ever dragged out - the opposite of Grindley when it comes to that.
More importantly, he always has ideas on how to make this league better.
To me, he ranks first among all those who weren't in this league in 2000, and
I'm hoping I can play some poker with this man before/after the draft this
year.
Here's the thing though, Scarfo, I just don't get some of your trades.
Beginning of last year I really liked your team, but I thought you traded away
a chance at competing for the title last year. And, by doing so, you made Gar's
team good. Blech. I guess it's like that quote of mine you always throw back at
me.. To paraphrase myself: Everyone should have the right to be an idiot.
Oh, and I LOVE seeing him get it on with Burr. It's always good to see people
get under Burr's skin.
BTW - Was there anything funnier than seeing a very serious, pierced lip
Michael Scarfo at the draft last year, surrounded by mounds of FLB magazines?
HILARIOUS: https://www.angelfire.com/ma4/gmds/photos/2002.html (last picture)
BTW2 - Probably the only guy as bothered by the Kimo comments last year as I
was...
Around the League:
For me, at least, the easiest (and most reasonable) owner to bang out a trade
with... we're usually of the same mind.
Can the guy keep a player for more than one day?… My favorite for first going
into the start of last season but just destroyed his team from the inside out…
Imagine the alien baby coming out of the Alien’s womb but more gory.
Certain issues can definitely set him off (I'm still digesting The Great
Audible Debate of Peyton Manning ...), but a solid, reliable owner. Always a
character.
Clearly one of the most volatile owners. Gets worked up over the most minute
issue / debate. Does a good job of bringing up the flaws with the current
system.
His rants are legendary. I've never seen anyone so upset about ESPN
broadcasting 30 seconds of spelling bee on Sportscenter before.
Scarfo made a mark with some good drafting but appeared KC Royal-like in
trading away some of his best players; no owner did more harm to his team after
draft day.
Was wise to utterly revamp his team (in a *frenzied* three day orgy of dealing)
... he was gonna finish near the bottom if he didn't land some quality guys
before the draft (what good would it be to have all that money with no one to
spend it on?) ...
One of my favorites in the league. Has an edge to him that most owners don't.
One of a handful of guys I would actually spend time with outside of the
league.
I'm hoping he brings as many fantasy magazines to the auction once again this
year ...
Very poor management of his minor leaguers last year.
Rishi (Yanks)
AKA - PollMaster. Minister of the Polls.
"I may be disturbed"
I can be overbearing. I can be a jerk. I have a short-temper. I probably don't
like you.
I'm funny. I'm confident. I've won. I have a kick-ass goatee.
I'll just let other people comment, because I know I talk about myself too much
as is.. for instance, why do I feel the need to include my personal life in
League Polls? I know no one gives a fuck. I'm too egocentric, that's why. (For
more info on this fascinating human being see: Napoleon Complex)
Around the league:
Comes up with innovative and funny polls, but in the process can be something
of a potstirrer.
Another person who has unquestioned loyalty to the league, and has demonstrated
fairness when it comes to "controversial" issues.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again, and I'll say I've said it before,
and I'll say it again, again ... but he's the absolute key to our merry little
league. I can't say last year was our best year of fantasy baseball, deSPITE
our best group of owners, largely because he wasn't prominent in the
proceedings. Le Roi des Polls ... doesn't get anywhere near enough credit - or
love - for his inspired, gifted stewardship of the Ministry.
I just wish one of these years he'd initiate a trade with ME. I mean, we always
consummate a trade in April or May (or in the moments leading up to the trading
deadline ... good times), but it's always my superior creativity and scrotal
moxie that gets the deal done.
His Achilles': He needs His Jenn, or, to a lesser extent, me, to harness his
raw, visceral, Metallica skulls emotion that often envelop him at critical
junctures. It's what makes him truly an unrivaled character, but can often be
his undoing.
Kwan is gay.
On the trading front, I find that just about every deal he makes is greatly in
his favor. I respect him for getting the best deal he can, but it leads me to
wonder whether he and I will ever get a deal done.
Tends to disappear in stretches, but his line of work makes it understandable.
Can [he] make a deal that favors the other team?…
RishiV1219: I like how everyone says that I make lopsided deals.
RishiV1219: I think it's a fine line between being a cheat and being a good
trader.
RishiV1219: People think of Gar as good trader
RishiV1219: They think of Grindley as a cheat
RishiV1219: They think of me as somewhere in betweeen [sic]
RishiV1219: I think the difference is that Gar makes lots of offers to lots of
people, and they're fair.
RishiV1219: I dont [sic] make as many offers, and I usually can tell who is
going to be more apt to make a dub [sic] trade in my favor.
Rishi is really hairy, that always bugged me…
One of the most up front in your face guys as in you say what you want and lay
it out there for all to see.
One of the more rational owners.
A proud member of the Glenn bandwagon :)
Likes to have polls for life altering decisions.
Has a tendency to be too complacent with the rules and don't take new rules
considerations very well.
Our pollmaster. The trouble provoker. Does things for shock value - If he keeps
Mariano Rivera I swear he must have gone mad! But if there's one man I'd trust
to give me a rectal exam, it's Dr. Vohora.
I really don't have much to say....you are like Gary ("He's the kind of
guy who I think I would definitely have hung out with had we grown up
together", etc) ....I just think you guys get it. I like how you run your
team and think you've got the right idea that as much as we all still want to
win that this is still only fantasy baseball. Only a few guys in this league do
I really enjoy hearing from, you're definitely one of them.
Gary (Red Sox)
AKA - Gary "Rainbow Brite" Blanchard.
"but won't you concede"
Like most Red Sox fans, he lives in a World of past glories and whatifs. Unlike
Red Sox fans, he can actually remember winning. Either way though, he hasn't
won in since 2000, and it's KILLING him. Think about it, he doesn't have kids,
he doesn't have a wife, he doesn't have a girlfriend.. hell, he doesn't even
have a JOB. This is his life, we are his friends, and the GMDS Trophy is his
Grail. We'd love him more if he wasn't constantly crying in his beer about
Pedro's shoulder.
That being said, until (2002leaguechampion) Glenn arrived, Gar was thought of
as the FLB Mind of the League. He's clearly widely respected around the league,
and I bet everyone's comments will respect that. I know at least owner holds
his words with equal weight to Brandon Funston's, and Kwan is not only
attracted to him, but also treats what he says as gospel.
Does he have FLB faults? Yes. There is little that he gets more passionate
about than the Red Sox (he was clearly more into the Kevin Millar signing than,
say.. women in general) and you can often play off this. He's not just a fan,
he's a cheerleader. Nomar isn't just one of the best SSs in the game, he's a
Goddamn Roman God to Gary. It's true. I don't know what would get him more
upset - saying Nomar has questionable range, or saying that he's not that good
looking. Seriously.
Believe it or not, he has personality faults too. I know some of you will have
a hard time believing it, but the man knows how to play the game, and you've
all been played.
It starts off innocently enough - you'll make some comment on the BB like
"How come Don Baylor overworks his pitchers so much?" and then he'll
write back to you privately (that's totally his medium, the private message).
It goes something like this:
You're so right. Baylor can be an idiot sometimes. Your team can definitely
contend, if Baylor wasn't screwing it up so much. You're my best friend. And
it's a shame he IS screwing it up for you because you're insanely valuable in
this league. DEFinitely at least first or second tier overall of new members
this year. I love you. Great draft, by the way. I loved the [insert low priced
pick here] the most. This league would be dead without you. And we need to beat
Glenn don't we? Yes, we do. I want to have your children. Too bad Baylor's
screwing up Kerry Wood's arm though, isn't it? Listen, what do you think of
[insert name of random pitcher that he just picked up and has had 2 good starts
in a row]? You really look good in that outfit. You been working out?
Before you know it, Gar has your Kerry Wood, your entire minor league system,
and your FLOOTY vote. And you're stuck with Jason Johnson, a Godawful team and
a GeeWhiz Garisgreat smile. Congratulations, you're the latest victim of Gary
P. Blanchard's Magical Messageboard Mind Mastery. Blech.
BTW - Gar's a better writer than I'll ever be and it's a shame this wasn't
written by him, because you'd all still be reading.
Around the league:
One of the best contributors to the BB. Always provides insightful
comments--both public and private
To my knowledge, is one of the only owners that will discuss issues/trades with
nearly every owner. His trade offers are generally fair.
Like some of the other doctor-types in the league, tends to disappear for
certain lengths of time--but can we really fault him for that?
Should we question Gar's manhood?
[One of] the most baseball savvy members of the league…writes well and presents
his case in a very well thought out manner.
His love to have his Bosox players on his team will hurt him down the road. All
MLB teams become bad at some point… (Editor's Note: Err, what about 100 bad
years?.. or, like that commercial says, it's defies the law of statistics! I
mean, if you flip a coin a hundred times, calling heads each time, how can it
just keep poking you in the eye? Exactly.) …
He must be an idiot…
Gary owes about 75% of his success to the opinion people have of him. He's such
a politician.
One of the most rational in the league, but can be quite volatile over the
littlest things. Hard to read during trade talks, since he's going after trades
that favor him yet makes it seems like it's to your advantage
He's the kind of guy who I think I would definitely have hung out with had we
grown up together. I believe there are 2 kinds of people in this world. People
who get it and people who don't get it. Gary is definitely a guy who gets it. I
have the utmost respect for how he acts and what he says.
His personality can be very touchyfeely. Too much I LOVE YOU GUYS, and that can
be a flaw. Particularly regarding sensitive issues, like Kimo last year. Giving
one the benefit of the doubt is a good trait, but he does it every time. Never
has a bad word to say. Ever. Does he? Not publically. EXACTLY. Gary is
everyone's ally, confidante, gets people talking.
The best trader in the game. Has a mediocre record at drafting but always can
be counted on to make drastic improvements via the trade. Very creative in that
respect.
One of the true brains of fantasy baseball. I wish he'd write more fantasy
articles though.
Always provides voice of reason.
Sometimes comes across as GOD on the BB.
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Saturday: The Final Five Owners
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