IV. Darkness Binds Him

October 6th


Nathaniel took the backdoor from Guilty Pleasures and walked out to the cold October night. He was late, he knew it. Damian was probably waiting for him and had done so for a while. He shrugged in the cool air and hugged himself briefly, careful not to break the rose that he held in one of his gloved hands.

He hadn't bothered to braid his hair again. By the time he was ready to leave the toilet and face, if not the world, the empty dressing room, it had already been late. He had a long, white scarf coiled several times around his neck, his coat was dark blue and had several pockets. Useful if not exactly decorative.

He steered his steps towards the alley to the parking lot, his mind still tumbling with those dreaded questions: How on earth could that have happened? He'd been caught by surprise, yes...and was horny from the dancing and the thoughts of Damian...But how could...it was so humiliating. Being caught and forced like that and *come*! Nathaniel blushed again, rubbed his nose a bit, knew it got red when it was chilly like this and he wanted to be pretty for Damian.

That was how Tamlin saw him, wasn't it? His thoughts continued mercilessly while he walked...As someone you could grab and have your way with...Well, he hadn't exactly proven him wrong had he? Nathaniel sniffled a bit. Remembered the feel of Tamlin's lips on his, the hand jerking him off with fast, sure strokes.

Tamlin *knew* he was vulnerable...in the dark after the bright stage lights, naked and aroused. But how little respect did he have for Nathaniel to do something like that? What had Nathaniel done to make him believe he could be treated so? Slut...Amusing toy...Nothing new in that...Before Damian...he wouldn't even have thought about it. The idea of honor and pride must've rubbed off on him, Nathaniel smiled slightly...He was responsible to him as well...that was another thing...He didn't want anything humiliating happening to him because it would sort of humiliate Damian as well. It didn't suit the proud vampire to have a boyfriend who was everybody's meat. The thought suddenly stung: What if he couldn't keep up the illusion? Had Tamlin seen through him after all? What about him and Damian then? If Damian knew, saw, what he was like? It was a bitterly hilarious thing in the first place: that the vampire loved him, liked him enough to make him a boyfriend. Deep down Nathaniel still had his doubts...Doubts about all of it...He couldn't understand why Damian had happened to him...He was grateful and happy but acutely aware that he had gotten his paws on something he didn't really deserve...and he was always afraid that Damian would realize just that. So weak, he thought recalling again the scene in the stairs. So very, very weak...Let a stranger pleasure him like that...touch him...kiss him...and *come*. He blushed again, flaring shades of crimson...

He turned the corner to the alley: A little cat hissed and ran to hide under a dirty plastic bag. Its little tail wriggled as it tried to adjust and become invisible under the green plastic. Nathaniel smiled. He'd like to have cat, as a pet, or a friend rather...But all the kittens fled as soon as they caught the scent of him. Smelling something bigger and badder than they...they were cute though, and very familiar, he was sad he couldn't have a cat...

He emerged from the shadows, seemed like it was his mission tonight to startle and surprise Nathaniel. He himself couldn't believe that it hadn't crossed his mind the sleek vampire might be waiting for him, that the embarrassing scene in the stairs wasn't the end of it...Been too caught up in the shame, he supposed. Too busy with guilt to reflect...Now he felt himself first pale then blush and instinctively turn on his heels to flee. The vampire though, wanted nothing of it. With inhuman speed he caught up with him when he turned and sat up his pace.

Nathaniel froze and a bitter taste filled the cave of his mouth when he felt the other's hand take a firm grip of his upper-arm.

"Not so fast, kitty boy," Tamlin's voice spoke softly in his ear. "One would think that someone living with the executioner, being her special pet and all, would be little more careful when walking around at night," he chuckled.

Nathaniel felt angry and ashamed...Right! So it wasn't like he didn't know he was crap at defending himself.

"What do you want," he tried to sound calm but his voice somehow got stuck in his throat.

"What do I want?" the blue-haired vampire spoke, "So submissive and eager to please aren't you, Nathaniel?" he purred in an amused voice, then he leaned in closer and whispered sweetly, "I want to be inside of you, Nathaniel, fuck you good and fill you with my seed".

Nathaniel instantly panicked. He knew two things in that moment: He was in serious trouble, and judged by the way the other male spoke he had underestimated the vampire with several hundred years, which in turn meant even more trouble.

He wrestled his arm free from the hard grip and began running. He *was* a shape shifter, he *did* have some strength, he had never been more grateful for that fact.

He saw the lights at the end of the alley and went for them, didn't look back, didn't dare to...

"Stop!" Tamlin's voice sounded sharply and he shuddered to a halt. Pulled by a string he didn't know was there. Frozen in motion he stood panting while the leather clad vampire walked up to him. Blue hair hanging loose over his ankle length coat. He removed one of his gloves as he approached him, polished, sharp fingernails glinted in the dim light, so did his eyes; dark grey now, changing with the light from pale grey to silver and almost black.

Nathaniel's heart thundered in his chest. Fear crept across his skin leaving goosebumps and trails of cold sweat.

"Surprised?" The honeyed voice sounded to his ear. "Guess what," it continued,"I'm growing into my power these days...the master in me is breaking free," he paused to stroke Nathaniel's cheek with one finger. Made his breath shiver with fear. He could feel the force of him now...previously concealed, not anymore; it rolled down his spine like dark water.

"And do you know what I've discovered?" Tamlin asked him amused."The leopard will be my animal to call..."

He should have known it, shouldn't he? Tamlin's ability to read him, sense him, play him like he had...But Nathaniel was stronger than he appeared. Nathaniel had friends... Although shivering and afraid, still wondering why his feet seemed glued to the pavement, he spoke:

"This city already has a master..." His voice sounded thin and fragile like a child's in the dark, narrow alley. The vampire in front of him laughed softly. It was not a kind or gentle sound:

"Jean-Claude? Yes...Although they say this city is really ruled by a woman..."

"Anita..."

"Is that her name? Executioner and Nimir-Ra isn't she?" The vampire paused a little. "But what is she to you, Nathaniel? Your mistress?"

"Yes...."

"Do you fuck her?"

"No!"

"I'm not impressed by your master," Tamlin continued and spat the last word.

"He is stronger than you...Tamlin," he had never used his name before. It felt awkward on his tongue. His breathing came ragged, the vampire was probably having a feast on the fear he radiated.

"Have I challenged your master?" the voice of the vampire was frightenly low.

"No..."

"Then why, do you defend him, sweet Nathaniel?" Something dreamy had come in to his voice and expression, he rose his hand again to run it through Nathaniel's hair.

"But that's what you want isn't it?" Nathaniel swallowed his fear for a moment: "You want me to betray them..."

The vampire's gaze focused again, his eyes met Nathaniel's, narrow and calm:

"Basically," he said. "I just want to fuck you." The casual way in which he said it made Nathaniel gasp. It was steel in this one. Steel and ice.

"I have a boyfriend," he tried. Longing for Damian with all his heart. Crying for him inwardly. Was at the brink of crying just by the thought of his loving, trusting eyes. It would be just a desperate attempt, he knew it. Tamlin wouldn't care...he had seen his Damian, seen him and judged him...

"The red-haired warrior?" Tamlin smiled, amused. "He is nothing for a pretty cat like you," he said with a wicked twinkle in his eyes. "Wouldn't you rather curl up next to a master?" His voice dropped to hardly more than a whisper as he leaned down and searched for Nathaniel's lips with his own.

"But I love him," Nathaniel whimpered in vain.

"You will love me too," his lips were just inches from Nathaniel's, his grey eyes disturbingly close. There was a light in them; a pure grey light. Precious and cold.

"No!" He suddenly broke free from the spell, tried to get past him in a desperate attempt for freedom. The arms that closed around his waist were expected but nevertheless a horrible disappointment, a cruel reminder of the hopelessness of the situation.

Damian, he cried inside. Please save me now! But, of course, nobody answered.

He was thrown backwards against the wall, the black clad vampire followed closely, moved in on him like quicksilver, too fast to follow with the eye.

"Naughty kitten!" he purred deep in his throat. "You don't fool me!" His eyes had narrowed again, made him look all feral and cruel. "You're not one to deny another's pleasure," he said low and hoarsely. His face came closer again, his gaze fixed on his throat.

"No!" Just one word, all his fear and despair...

"What will you do?" His voice sounded slightly amused again. "Fight me for you honor?" The chuckle that followed was worse than anything, the sound of it drained him and made him feel weak. He felt like crying but it was no use.

Trapped again. Like before. The vampire was right: How could he deny him?

No use...Why should he? Wasn't it easier, best for them all, if he just gave up the struggle? He would get what he wanted anyway...so much stronger, more powerful, than him.

Damian, forgive me, he thought and sobbed a little. Adjusted slightly when the vampire's pale fingers undid a few coils of his scarf and leaned in. The blue-black hair slid like cold silk across his bare neck when the budding master spoke again, his lips so close to Nathaniel's skin:

"I want to have you with me," he said. "I'm not leaving you behind... Beautiful... Nathaniel..." the pink lips brushed his skin now, the Vampire sighed with something like relief or...passion, the hot air from his breath tickled his neck.

The next step was pain. It always was. Sharp pieces of bone slid through the skin, made it melt away like butter under a hot knife. The blood asked no names but flowed freely out to the awaiting mouth, past the sensuous lips and down his throat. His tongue lapped at the wounds, swirled on his skin... Made it all feel like a intimate kiss. His gloved hand tangled in Nathaniel's hair as his mind began to slowly roll the leopard's. Brought on shiny waves of oblivion and bliss.

Nathaniel heard himself moan and bent his head backwards, suddenly filled by a desire for more.

"That's my kitty," he heard a voice, probably inside of his head. They were one now; the cat and the master, the rose in his suddenly powerless hand fell to the frozen ground and he hardly registered it. He spread his legs for the vampire's hand that sought it through layers of clothes. Spread them and adjusted when the buttons were ripped open, he rocked his hips slightly when the fingers slipped inside. Stood still and achingly hard while the vampire felt around down there, stroked and caressed him, touched every inch with his fingertips. He played with his balls, the inside of his thigh, a brief pressure against his entrance before the fingers redrew to stroke him off.

"You like that don't you..." The hand moved steadily, built up a rhythm. Nathaniel ached and moaned, thrust slightly with his hips. It felt so good and the vampire's kiss on his neck was so sweet...He felt his own arms move, his hands gather at the back of his head...such a beautiful color that...dark blue...like midnight...

He held the vampire tightly while he drank, breathed ragged and heavily as the pleasure built in his groin. So nice, he thought and wished that he would fuck him.

"Nathaniel!" The voice was stern, no -angry! "Na-tha-ni-el!" Emphasis on each syllable. He knew that voice, knew it well.

"Damian," a mewing sound that hardly made it across his lips.

"Let him go!" The voice was hoarse and made of sorrow. The lovely pressure of lips on skin was gone and Tamlin wiped the blood mingled saliva from his mouth with the back of his hand.
He chuckled:

"Ah! The knight! A little too late it would seem..."

Nathaniel felt dizzy and a little disappointed. He supported himself against the bricked wall and fumbled for his pants, tried clumsily to close the buttons, knew at some level it was highly inappropriate to stand there like that; pre-cum moistened erection peeking out in the air. Then he tried to focus on the vampires:

"Let him go," the voice repeated. Sounded a bit tired now.

"Why?" His master spoke.

"He is my lover." The red-haired vampire said, which sent a jolt of something...guilt or fear, through Nathaniel's being.

"Not good enough..." the sleek blue-haired one stated calmly. Standing just a few steps away from Nathaniel, facing the taller, broader one.

"Nathaniel!" Green gaze sought his now. "We're going home," the vampire told him. Fine...he really wanted to go home, but then it was the other, he wanted him to come too...Damian was looking at him now:

"You can't keep him dazed forever," he said. "When he comes to his senses he will want to be with me," he reasoned.

"Why? What can you give him...Warrior...that I can't?"

The red-head hesitated for a moment:

"Love..." he said at last. "But you don't understand that...so don't even try, just give him to me," he demanded.

"Love?" the other spat ironically. "I'll love him, don't you worry...now go away, I have a date with my pretty kitty!"

Nathaniel shook his head slightly. Something wasn't right with this picture...He suddenly really, really wanted to go home...

"I don't think 'the kitty', will like that much..." Damian told the blue-haired vampire.

"Oh, he seems pleased enough," Tamlin purred and turned his back to Damian, facing him, Nathaniel. Something was not right...

"It is wearing off," It was Damian who sounded amused now.

"Nathaniel," he said. "Come...let's go home."

"Damian," his own voice sounded thick and sleepy. "I want to go home!" He complained and stumbled a few steps from the wall. A leather clad arm stopped him though, prevented him from going any further.

"He gave himself by his own will," Tamlin's voice was calm and cool now. " I didn't force my fangs into his neck."

"Then why have you rolled his mind so?" The voice was still calm but shivering with something. Anger...fear...?

Tamlin smiled. "I don't always know my strength...it is one of the things that happens when you become a master...Child!" The voice was flaring with evil amusement.

"But you wouldn't know that, would you?" he added in a softer voice." I have my right to claim him," he continued after a brief pause."He is my animal to call..."

"Not in this city, you have not...His Nimir-Ra is the master's servant. You can not claim a hair on his head." He sounded stronger now. Almost smug. "And do not claim to be something you are not...yet."

"I'll soon become master..." His hand went back to Nathaniel's head, stroke down said hair with leather gloved fingers. He looked back at the other vampire over his shoulder. "And I want him," he added. "Or will you fight me for him?" He sounded amused again and confident to the core...

Nathaniel was scared:

"Damian, I want to go home..." he begged. " I want to go home now!"

"I'll take you home soon, Kitten." The dark voice that he knew so well soothed him and Nathaniel instantly felt better.

"Do you really think you can win?" The arrogant creature standing beside him asked his lover.

"I do," Damian said but Nathaniel could hear something bitter in his voice. He didn't like it... His hand went out and reached for him under the black-clad arm that held him captive. He spotted the rose on the ground. Tamlin had stepped on and crushed it; the sight was so sad he wanted to cry...

"So how are you going to fight me, Lover-boy?" Tamlin mocked Damian.

"The only way I can," the bitterness was more apparent now. Still he looked impressive, standing there; his legs spread, his clenched fists hanging by his sides. The blood red hair flowing down his tall, broad form. All dressed in black, like Tamlin...He didn't attack him though, he turned his gaze to Nathaniel instead:

"Come on. Kitten," he called him as before. "We're going home now."

Nathaniel instantly took another step forward, wanting so badly to go to him. When the arm came to stop him, he tried to escape it by stepping aside, he was caught though, but he'd almost made it.

"Don't," Tamlin said lowly.

"See," Damian's voice sounded. "You haven't claimed anyone. His will is still free and he belongs with me."

"Does he?" Tamlin sounded annoyed for the first time. "Nathaniel never denies anyone," he said. "I can see it in his eyes, he's so sweet and submissive," the honeyed voice continued and a thumb came to cuddle Nathaniel's chin. "Now, are we going to fight...or not?" he asked Damian.

It was then, by sheer luck, Nathaniel managed to slip free from Tamlin's hold. In an act of desperation and without really thinking he quickly closed the distance to Damian and threw himself at him. Panting heavily and dead scared but safe and at home he grabbed one of Damian's arms and wrapped it around his own body like a shield. Hid his face against Damian's coat and tried to calm his heart beat.

"Now does he belong with me, or not?" Damian's voice hadn't changed. Was still calm and emotionless with a little hint of bitterness.

The pull rolled in, stronger than before, sang to Nathaniel's very core. Called him by evoking him..The beast flared, calmed, flared to life again.

"No!" He complained but the waves continued to call at him. The force of nature pulled it forth. Summoned it like a spirit or a ghost. The cat stretched lazily, then it became alert.

"No..." he uttered again, feeling angry and sad and desperate at once, but his voice had become a low growl in his throat. He felt his jaws change, he had fangs himself now.

"Yes, Kitten...let me see how beautiful you are..." Tamlin's voice spoke almost as in awe.

"No," he growled again and turned his head to face Tamlin, his sight had changed, the darkness meant nothing now. The scent of blood and anger...the sweet scent of arousal; it was all in the air around them.

His claws ripped into the fabric of Damian's coat and he reculantly let it go. Wanted so badly to walk to *him*. Be with Tamlin, protect him...The urge was so strong, it ate at him. Overwhelmed him...

He took a step...another one, he could feel his feet were changing as well. From toes to soft pads and claws...

He walked away from Damian, one hesitant step at the time while his insides screamed and refused the sudden violation. His heart shattered with every step...

"Nathaniel," Damian's voice was low and calm. "Come, let's go home!"

He paused. He hesitated and his feet stood firmly on the ground. He didn't move and the pull faded slightly. With slow motions as if he was surrounded by something thick and sticky he turned around and began on the long, hard way back to Damian. Every step was a challenge and he didn't remember why it was important. Just knew that it was. He had to go back to the red-haired one, no matter the cost. No matter the options...

It pulled and tugged at him but he wanted to go back. The male vampire was very important. Something nice and safe fluttered through his mind. The vampire was warmth and comfort...

Step by hard step he crossed the short distance and almost fell against the tall male. Felt arms catch him and pick him up, lift him up in air. He fought to breath and not convulse as his body shifted and shifted back again.

"He is mine," The red-haired vampire's voice sounded all too clear and loud in his leopard ears.

"I'll be a master..." The dark one replied calmly but he smelled of disappointment and anger.

"Till then," Nathaniel felt the vampire holding him bow slightly. Something mocking perhaps, in his tune.

"Till then..." Tamlin's voice repeated bitterly. "Sooner or later," he added with a shrug, "I'll have him...I won't remain weak forever, Warrior."

*

On their way back to the car Nathaniel shifted completely back to human. Still hanging limply in Damian's arms he suddenly began to sob and cry. His body began shivering violently and he shook in Damian's arms.

"Pull yourself together, Nathaniel." Damian sounded sternly above his head. "You will have to drive." he added.

"Yes..." Nathaniel said in a low whimper.

He steadied himself on the car when Damian put him down, scrambled around a bit for the keys in his pocket. His hand was shaking so it was hard to find the right one, insert and unlock. Finally he sank down in the driver seat and leaned over to unlock the other door from the inside. Damian sat down beside him. His presence filled the small space like red hot fire. Nathaniel didn't say a word. He was still dizzy. His mind and body battered and shocked.

He breathed deeply a few times, reminded himself he'd been through worse. But not with him, that helpful little voice inside reminded him...Not while in love with Damian...

He clenched his jaws and fought his tears, started the the engine with trembling hands. He didn't dare to look at Damian. Wished that he would say something...anything!

He drove out of the parking lot, relieved to leave the Guilty Pleasures behind. When he had hit the road, he suddenly couldn't take the silence anymore.

"I'm sorry!" he burst out and gave a deep sob. Wiped the tears away with his hand to see the road clearly.

Damian didn't answer, he sat silent for moment while Nathaniel cried:

"Watch the road, Nathaniel," he said at last. Nothing more was said... but Nathaniel cried and Damian was silent, looking out of the window, radiating strongly with anger. He was glad it wasn't far to the Circus.

Damian didn't touch him as they walked downstairs. Didn't support him although he was stumbling on shaky legs down the long corridors. His chest ached like something was missing: A black hole where his heart should be.

He followed closely when Damian opened the door to the room. Slipped inside before the door slammed shut, he tried for a trembling smile...Knew he had to look horrible. Stained...filthy. He still held the car-keys in his hand, dangled them from one finger, suddenly Damian grabbed them and threw them hard in the wall. they clattered to the floor with a ringing sound.

Nathaniel winced and whimpered. He withdrew a bit, took a few steps back from the raging vampire.

"I'm sorry..." the wereleopard said breathlessly, new tears gathered in his eyes but he didn't bother to hide or remove them.

"Don't be," the vampire replied bitterly. "It's just who you are...you can't help it!"

"Then...why are you angry?" Nathaniel asked without thinking. Knew in the same instant it was a mistake.

"Go!" Damian shouted."Go, Nathaniel! I can't look at you!" he added. "Just go!" The green eyes sparkled with fury and his fists were clenched hard together by his sides. He turned away from the leopard and tossing his crimson hair over the black velvet of his jacket.

"But..." Nathaniel's voice was nothing more than a whisper in the big chamber that he knew so well: The large chair, the sword on the wall, the rug where they made love...

"Go..." Damian replied softly. " I don't want to see you...Go!"


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