Ok, here I go, I think. My full name is Christina Renee Lillig. I am 29 yrs old, born and raised in Powder Springs, GA. I grew up with both original parents, 1 brother, 2 sisters, cats throughout the years, and my granny. I have an older half-sister named Tori that I have never met. My father is a truck driver and works a lot, but I remember him always being there for me. He was an alcoholic growing up so I do remember lots of fighting going on with my parents and a lot of physical abuse to my mother. My mother has always been withdrawn emotionally, but very outgoing and spunky. Can you be all that in one package? She's a friend to everyone else, but not with her own kids. I grew up with her hating all my friends and boyfriends, plus if I came to her about anything personal it would be used against me later. I learned not to tell her anything at a very young age. I grew up with my parents also being Jehovah's Witnesses and although it may be right for some people, I didn't like it at all and as soon as I was old enough to make my own decisions I quit going. My parents got kicked out of the religion due to their faults so they do not currently belong to any religion, but they still do not celebrate birthdays or holidays of any sort. It was confusing to me growing up. My mother celebrated xmas and holidays, while my father would remain in his bedroom and have no part of it. He wasn't hateful about it, he just wouldn't be a part of it. My oldest brother, Sonny, is an alcoholic and drug addict. He has been in a lot of trouble over the years, but luckily met a woman who had 2 children of her own and he worshipped the ground she walked on. He straightened up and even owns his own carpet cleaning business now. He slips now and then, but for the most part is clean and living a good life now. Nikki, she is one crazy package. I love her dearly, but she got on the wrong side of the tracks by 6th grade and never came back. She was even running from the law for 4 years. She changed her identity (used my maiden name which I am still not happy about) and hid in Pensacola, Florida for those years. I love her dearly but wish she'd grow up. She got busted and everything is cleared up, but she still cannot put the booze down. She and I were sooo close during 2 years of her being sober. But, she returned to life on the streets right before Ashley was born and still has never seen her. Sherri, my oldest sister (age 36) is from a different tree herself. She is very independent and always has to play miss tough girl. She was so jealous when I was getting married that the day before my wedding I found out she never planned on showing up. I was short one bridesmaid, but we survived. She and I are not talking at all right now and haven't in over a year now. It saddens me, but life goes on. Let's see. Me, I grew up as a big thinker. I always analyzed everything going on around me and stayed far from all of it. I wanted my life to be better. I had big plans for myself! I started playing softball in 3rd grade and became quite good. I think it kept me focused and out of trouble. I did good in elementary school with grades, but once I entered middle school I couldn't stand school. I had a best friend that I met in 4th grade. She had an older brother and he was very mean to me. He made me feel really bad about myself and then in 6th grade he raped me. I was soo young I didn't even know that was what he did until years later. He continued to threaten and hurt me for 3 years while this sexual abuse continued. He threatened to tell my parents and my parents thought he was the greatest boy in the world. I was scared and always did what he told me. I snuck out and had to walk a mile to some woods where he and a friend of his would rape and hurt me over and over through the night. I'd run all the way back home crying. This went on until 8th grade. I finally was old enough to understand a little more and was sooo sick of being hurt and how I was beginning to feel about myself that I stood up to him and called his bluff. He continued to tease me, start rumors about me and be hateful to me throughout high school but the sexual abuse stopped. I hated school because of him! I took me lots of years of therapy to work through this, but I am happy to say I have and I guess this is why I am okay with telling people about it now. I learned to talk about my past openly and have actually helped other girls and guys, like myself, get through sexual abuse also. I always had a boyfriend but always got cheated on, so I had a lot of broken hearts throughout high school. I studied cosmetology in high school and started working in a salon at age 16 cutting hair. I was very good and even went to competitions. In 12th grade a hairdresser fixed me up with one of her single clients. His name was Richard and I fell in love with him hard. I was dating a boy already but we split up and just remained good friends. Richard (he was 7 yrs older than I was) and I dated and I started catching him on dates with other women. On xmas eve, 1991 I caught him in bed with another girl and I went ballistic. I drove around for hours and then ended up at my friend Chris' house. He's the guy I already mentioned that I dated then broke up with just before Richard. I had sex with Chris that night to try and forget what was happening. A few days prior I had sex with Richard after a xmas party so when I showed up pg I was confused. I was only 17 and didn't make the best judgement call. I never told anyone about Chris, and told everyone it was Richard's baby. This went on for a year. Richard cheated on me throughout my pg with Tyler and after Tyler was born Richard's roommate sat me down and told me Richards has been cheating on me with a stripper the entire pg. I was devastated. I was dealing with grown-up things and I was just a kid…or at least felt like it. The truth finally came out, and we had a DNA test done, which showed Richard 95% NOT Tyler's dad. We just left it alone. Tyler knows the entire story so maybe one day he may choose to pursue finding Chris, but I doub he will want to. He is happy now. Well, I ended up meeting a guy soon after and we dated for 4 years. His name was David and he became possessive of me and abusive. He beat me up all the time, drugged me and forced me on his friends sexually. I lost 4 years of Tyler's life and forced my parents to care for him cause I was soo far gone. The drugs numbed the pain I felt for the lies I was living after finding out Richard was not Tyler's dad. I felt horrible for lying for soo long. All I believed in seemed to be slipping from my hands fast. Well, I got fed up one night! I ran away from everyone and everything and cried my eyes out in a church parking lot. Then, this man tapped on my window and I rolled it down without a thought (could have slashed my throat). He looked at me and reached his hand onto my shoulder and said, "Everything is going to be alright". I just laid my head on my steering wheel and cried and when I looked up he was gone. I got a chill! I drove around looking for this man and never found him. BUT, it changed my life forever. I went home, told my parents of my drug addiction and all that I'd gone through and told them I wanted to get help. I admitted myself into rehab and after I got out I stayed in counseling for 3 more months. I was very proud of myself for going through with rehab and I refused to talk to any old friends or acquaintances during this time. I had to concentrate on getting my life together and figuring out what I now wanted for myself. That is when I met dh. I had switched jobs to get away from all the negative influences and dh wouldn't stop asking me out. I refused his offers for 4 months. I was still trying to get my ex boyfriend to leave me alone and didn't want to drag him into the craziness. My ex started stalking me and abusing me when he'd catch me outdoors alone. I was frightened. Finally, I gave in to dh because I got fed up once again! (ha ha) I walked up to dh after work one Friday afternoon and asked him out this time. He was thrilled I could tell. We went out that evening and have been together ever since. The reason I went out with him was I kept telling myself I deserved someone like him, who was nice and gentle to me. He was the total opposite of what I usually went out with. Well, I am grateful I listened to myself! He is the most incredible husband in the world! Anyways, we dated for 8 months, got engaged and got married 4 months later. We had my fairytale dream wedding! The next year, we bought our first home. We decided to get pregnant after I turned 26 yrs old. I went through my first midlife crisis LOL. We had Ashley August 28, 2001, and well, you know the story about her. We thought she would be it, fearing another child with cancer and all. But, when Ashley was nearing the end of therapy last year I had something to prove to myself. I had to prove that I could carry and deliver a baby without cancer. That is when we decided to conceive again. Now that we have AJ and he is healthy, I can put Ashley's cancer behind me, where it belongs. I am currently home with all 3 kids, working my own home-based business and helping Tyler move up with his BMX racing. He wants to go Pro someday. I love my family and who I am now! I am very confident after overcoming all I have in my life. I have come a long, long way and am grateful for always believing in myself. I hope to always instill this in my 3 kids so they will be able to overcome many obstacles in their own lives. Anyways, that's it! Sorry so long. Christy Lillig proud mother of Tyler 9/3/92, Ashley 8/28/01 (born w/ cancer, fought it and is in remission!), AJ born 2/23/03. (mom & AJ-4months)
