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<p align="center"><font size="7" face="Georgia">~*Telemarketer Fun*~</font><font size="7">
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<b><a href="http://www.angelfire.com/magic/smilenjoy"><=Back</a></b></td>
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<p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:left">
<span class="article">
<span style="font-family:Arial;color:black"><b>Think telemarketers
are soooo annoying? Get even! when they next call :</b></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:left">
<b><span style="font-family:Arial;color:black"><br>
<span class="article"> 1. Insist that the caller is really your buddy
Leon, playing a joke. "Come on, </span></span><span class="article">
<span style="font-family:Arial;color:black">Leon, cut it
out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?" </span></span>
<span style="font-family:
Arial;color:black"><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 2. If they start out with, "How are you
today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to
care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my
eyelashes are sore, my dog just died . . . " </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 3. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ
Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company
name. Then ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business,
how many people work there, how they got into this line of work if they
are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue asking them personal
questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.
</span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 4. This works great if you are male.
Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company. " You: Wait
for a second and with a real husky voice ask, "What are you wearing?"
</span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 5. Cry out in surprise, "Judy? Is that you? Oh
my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few
brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know
you from. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 6. Say "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the
sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to
speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up
for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can,
"I don't have any friends, would you be my friend?" </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 8. If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can
you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"
</span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 9. After the Telemarketer gives his or her
spiel, ask him or her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them
that you can't just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.
</span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 10. Tell the Telemarketer that you work for
the same company, and they can't sell to employees. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 11. Answer the phone. As soon as you realize
it is a Telemarketer, set the receiver down, scream, "Oh my God!" and then
hang up. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the
moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number
so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that
telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't
want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and
you say, "Me either!" Hang up. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 13. Ask them to repeat everything they say,
several times. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 14. Tell them it is dinner time, but ask if
they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue
to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your
dinner conversation. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 15. Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home
incarceration" and ask if they could bring you some beer. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 16. Ask them to fax the information to you,
and make up a number. </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 17. Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen
to you. But I should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."
</span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 18. If they want to loan you money, tell them
you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. </span>
<br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 19. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that
they need to speak up . . . louder . . . louder . . . </span><br>
<br>
<span class="article"> 20. Tell them to talk very slowly, because you
want to write every word down.</span></span></b></p>
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