This is my title for the past year. It's fitting. 2000/2001 were the "years that sucked". 2002 was the year that sucked further. And just when you think things can't possibly get worse, they show you it can. First my mum almost dies, then my brothers guinea pig does. Mum and me were more upset over that than he was. The fact we were looking after her and watching her deteorate probably had something to do with it. So 2003 just added to the theory that this century sucks alot.

2004 hasn't had a great start. We survived christmas, then got mail from my dear stepfather whom we havent heard from since the previous year. Mum put the money to use to take us to rottnest, we'd never been there because of him. However any fun I might have had went fully out the window the next morning when Hairy died. Like every morning I got up and opened her cage. While eating breakfast Jarrad comes out to say she's in his room. No idea how she got there but I went and got her and she had a blocked nose. Nothing new there. She's always has. So I went out the back with her til she was fine then left her on the swing wrapped in her rag. Something I've done alot. I went inside then to download my brothers photos for him. After that I went to check on her and noticed she wasn't on the swing anymore. I went to look for her and found her near the drain pipe. I picked her up and she was having trouble breathing. I took her inside and within seconds she was having some kind of culvulsions and died. It was horrible. There was nothing I could do for her, it was over so quickly. I partically blame myself. I've never had good luck with pets, but I keep wondering if I had stayed out there would she have left the swing. Or if I had kept her with me inside would it be different. I just keep seeing her poor little face...

...i cant believe that i'm getting so upset over a pet..people thought it was rediculous i had her operated on..I hope I get over it soon though. Or I'm going to go mental. i'm leaving...

I've never been a pet person. Mostly because I'm cursed and it's better for the animals well being to be as far away from me as possible.

Technically this wasn't MY pet, but we had a budgie. She got some foot disease and got hit on the head.

Pet 1: when I was around 8 or 9 I got a bunny and called it Pinky. Things were going great til one day Lance finds a half-blind rottweiler pup and brings it home. It grew up to think it was a rabbit, but it got bigger and one day killed my rabbit. Mum picked me up from school to tell me. Needless to say I hated the dog for a while.

Pet 3: While in Port Hedland I got a kitten. I think I had it a week at the most. Lance wouldn't let me have it in the caravan..so one night it got killed by 2 dogs from the neighbouring fire station.

Pet 4: Setting - Darwin. Got 2 cats this time, one was mine. Called it Felix. She had 3 litters, they were all so cute! Had her almost 2 years when the dog from the house behind us killed her while trying to protect her kittens. The other cat ran away about a year before.

When we got back to Perth mum got another kitten, which got ran over. She then got finches, the male was a total psycho and hated me..went beserk whenever I walked into the room. Not that I cared..it wasn't mine.

Enter new pet..for an early xmas present I got a rat. I wanted one for years but mum refused..but then she got me one. Lance insisted it was male. I was going to call it Gizmo cos it hated the light, but Hairy kind of stuck. Months later I found out she was actually a girl. I couldn't exactly go changing her name! We have lots in common..ew both hate light..we both sneeze far too much..and we love junk food. Mum pointed out after a while that it helped my depression, but it also proved that I should NEVER have children! The stress would kill me... First thing I freaked about was this red stuff around her nose. Took her to a vet and said it wasn't blood but prolly something she got from the bedding I was using. Then this year, as if enough hadn't gone wrong already, she gets a tumour on her leg. Got it operated on and she had to spend a week with a head collar. All traumatising for her. But now it's about 2 months and I've found another..I'm not dealing with it at all well. It's hard not to get upset. You look after for something you tend to get attached. I'm not ready to part with her. Yes I'm selfish..bite me

Which is why in the future I'd rather have a fish(thats if someone feels the need to buy me an animal) because there is absolutely no way to get emotionally attached to one!

I really must go to bed now...

Ok..now I want to talk about bruises. Your probably wondering why on earth would you want that for a topic? Well its quite simple..I have the blackest bruise in history on my leg curtesy of Greater Union cinemas! They really shouldn't have the lights off during the film, people could easily mistake plastic cupholders for seats!! And for plastic..it really does hurt.

What really gets on my nerves though is how I get a big black bruise from plastic, yet I can be whacked with a large object and get nothing! I reckon I can get hit by a car and not get a scratch..I really wouldn't be surprised in the least. My biggest injury to date is from a concert..I swear I thought my shoulder was broken..but it was bruised..the invisible kind.

My scars are just like bruises..I've burnt myself in ovens, cut myself with all kinds of things..yet the only scars I have come from chicken pox and an unknown source!! And the chicken pox scars I could really live without. Whenever I go into a shop they're stupid bloody lighting makes them glow and scream out 'look at me!'

I really need to leave and sulk now..I might try photographing my bruise..for sentimental (and perhaps slightly morbid) reasons..

I've decided to restart my BLOG my discussng the word BLOG.

It is my personal opinion(and my opinion goes) that BLOG sounds more like a body function that shouldn't be discussed, than a place on the internet where one writes thoughts(in my case...thoughts of utter nonsense!)

There's stacks of places where one may go and get a BLOG, Linkin Park even have a spot for fans to set up LPblogs, what champs they are! People can even go all out and have weBLOGS, but I decided there was far too much effort involved to do that..

ok..so i currently can't think of anything else to do with this topic..its boring now..