Hard To Swallow

When I tell people that
I stole an alligator’s guts,
They usually look at me and
tell me something like “you’re nuts!”


When I tell people I
played football with the Green Bay Packers,
They usually look at me and
say, “I’m sorry, but you’re crackers!”


When I tell people I own
half of Florida’s cabanas,
They usually look at me
and say, “my friend, you are bananas!"


And when I tell people
that I clean my bedroom with a rake,
They usually look at me
and say “you’re truly a fruit cake”

I like to tell strange stories,
And they’re all made up, of course.
But being told I’m crazy
makes me hungry as a horse!

(I still haven’t figured out why... guess
I’m a few sandwiches shy...)

(C) 1998, Arden Davidson