Chapter 16

If two glasses of milk went ice-skating in July would Mike still burn popcorn?

"If three things happen in a set consecutive order logic dictates that the order will manifest itself into as many different forms as there are witnesses to the events so as to preserve the chaos that has been engrained in human nature."

-The Secrets of the Universe

The room stood in absolute silence as Micah began to approach the stand. It could be argued that the room did not in fact stand in absolute silence as there were at least 3 people not standing. Lesser people may interpret this as a tangent but in order to present an accurate depiction of the events all details must be presented and explained.

Calmly Micah approached the stand. The fate of the entire race rested upon his shoulders. He began…

"One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish. Black fish, blue fish, old fish, new fish."

Micah retreated from the stand as the Triad contemplated the argument at hand. Joel began to cry tears of pure joy, as the rest of the group remained dumbfounded at the turn of events.

"Somebody understands, they finally get it," Joel exclaimed in unmasked enthusiasm. For the argument regarding masked and unmasked emotion refer to Chapter 2.

"I may be the only one but I am led to believe that your comments have furthered the case against you of being a complete MORON!!!" exclaimed Girdy.

"That argument makes no sense, and furthermore does not relate at all to the situation at hand," Wes said once again delegated to his position of ignorance and stupidity.

"Wes, don’t agree with me. When I said I may be the only one I really meant that I was the only one that needed to talk."

"But I agree with you. Your argument makes perfect sense," Wes replied.

"You fail to understand Wes. When you talk you destroy my entire case causing me to relocate my argument to the side of Micah."

"I guess that does sort of make sense," replied Wes.

"No!! Stop it!! Don’t agree with me ever!" Girdwood exclaimed now obviously annoyed at the lack of Wes’s comprehension. He decided that physical violence was the only way to solve the situation.

"Joel, Wes said that you have a big nose. Big as Greenland." Said Girdy.

"I’m sooo happy. What joy! Pure…he said WHAT?!?" Joel exclaimed, suddenly breaking out of the state of bliss that he was in. In what appeared to be a single bound, though it could be misconstrued as 2 and a half bounds, Joel had reached Wes and began to extract physical justice for the comment which he had just endured.

What he means audience is that Joel hit him hard said Girdwood. Hey wait, I’m the narrator you are not allowed to speak or explain things without quotation marks. Sorry Girdwood replied. I don’t think your getting it.

"Oh, sorry," Girdwood replied.

That’s better.

"Alright that’s it. I’m not Wes and I don’t get your argument," Dan said to Micah.

"That’s because you’re an idiot." Micah replied.

"What? I don’t get it," said Dan.

"My point."

While this argument could go on forever as Micah was in no danger of being outwitted by Dan and Girdy was having to much fun watching Wes get beat up by Joel, I will fast forward ahead 10 minutes.

"Alright, the argument goes like this…"

For the next hour Micah, with the help of Joel, began to explain the concept of alien logic as it related to Suessian economics, and the influence of the higher circle of Suessian mysticism (1) had on the brain of alien intelligence’s. After the explanation the group was still entirely confused except for Wes, but Girdwood explained that he was not human and that he was already predisposed to alien logic. Also there was the Matson thing.

"SILENCE!! WE HAVE REACHED A DESCISION!!"

In an effort to gain an upper hand on everyone else in the room Girdwood tried to use his Ti Quan Ouchie technique to learn of the sentence which was to be handed down. To his astonishment and mine it worked. Honestly I didn’t want to have his technique work, but am left with little else to work with.

"Wait! Wait! I want another trial. I plead guilty," Girdwood exclaimed.

"What is he doing. He has gone mad, if he wasn’t already," Dave exclaimed.

In a flash of light Micah disappeared using his technique of time-travel.

In a flash of light Micah reappeared using his technique of time-travel.

"May I be allowed to speak? Girdwood, Joel, and I have decided to plead guilty to the crimes of humanity," Micah replied.

Once again the logic of Micah baffled the group, but they had come to expect it. Girdwood understood why Micah had said what he did, but to this day Joel is still completely confused as to why he was included in this group of three. It was revealed to him in the future that it was his idea to have himself put into the group so as to create another story line, but he can’t know that now. The group turned to hear the judgement of the court….

Wait! Stop! Don’t go on to the next chapter yet. I forgot something.

"Wes, your chapter was stupid!" exclaimed Girdy.

"Was not!" replied Wes.

"Was!"

"Was not!"

"Was!"

"Was not!"

"Was!"

"Was not!"

"Was!"

"Was not!"

"Was!"

"Was not!"

"Was!"

There was an inerring logic in Girdy's argument that made Wes re-consider.

There don’t we all feel better.