Welcome to the office of the Vice President of the Online Shadow Clan, JR Ewing.
You can see the improvements made. Make yourself comfortable, pour yourself a drink, and the Vice-President will be in eventually...
Timeline
- December 6, 1997
- President NightBringer creates the Online Shadow Clan, for a purpose as of now still unknown.
The President creates the Online Shadow Clan home page.
JR Ewing (yours truly) becomes the second member of the new organization.
- December 7, 1997
- The registration form is set up on the Home Page.
The Clan gets its own email address.
The Clan gets its own ICQ account, usable only by the President and JR Ewing.
- December 8, 1997
- JR Ewing is unilaterally elected Vice President by the President, and he accepts.
Venture becomes the Clan's third member.
- December 11, 1997
- The Clan hires a secretary, Miss Dragon.
Anubis becomes the Clan's fourth member.
- December 19, 1997
- The VP hires a secretary, Sly Lovegren.
- October 24, 1998
- After a moratorium of ten months from working at his desk, JR Ewing returns to work. He fires his secretary while listening to "I Want It All," but rehires her after 27 minutes while listening to "Innuendo."
- May 25, 1999
- After another moratorium, this time of seven months, JR Ewing returns to work.
Explore the Office
This is not a real office, but an imaginary office online. However, you probably knew that, so I was wasting my breath.
Oxygen is a hot commodity! Click on the links below to explore my office.
The Door The Floor The Walls
The Ceiling The Window The File Cabinet
The Bar The Table The Couch
The Clients' Chair The Vice President's Chair The Vice President's Desk
The Door
The door is now an oak door with a brass doorknob. On the side facing outside is a brass nameplate that says "JR Ewing: Vice President of the Online Shadow Clan." On the side facing inward is a dart board.
We are not responsible for any injuries incurred from darts.
The Floor
I now have a navy blue carpet all over the floor of my office, covering up the ugly, gray tiles. Everywhere, except the bar, where the gray tiles were uprooted and replaced by a black and white checkerboard floor.
I do not want to spill drinks on the carpet. At the entrance to the room is a crimson rug for people to wipe their feet and blood on.
The Walls
On the wall to the right of my desk is a portrait of me. The door stopper behind the door and the light switch still remain on the walls.
The Ceiling
The ceiling looks like that of a school built in the 1970's, sprinklers and all.
The Window
The window is 2 1/2 feet wide and 4 1/2 feet tall. In front of the window are opaque, white draperies to keep the sun out and maintain relative darkness in the room.
The File Cabinet
My beautiful green file cabinet is finally here! In it are files, books, that kind of stuff.
The Bar
The bar now looks like the typical office bar. The bar has a great variety of drinks, operated using squeeze things that you can point at visitors if you are angry. Also in the bar is a sink, and a cup rack.
The Table
This dark oak table already has JR's coat sprawled across it. It is intended to be a display area if I even bother to clear it off.
The Couch
When it is here, the VP My plush crimson couch is now here! Ooh! It is so comfortable, I do not think I can get up!
The couch is located between the door and the display table.
The Clients' Chair
This chair is comfortable, but not as ooh-la-la as the couch is. If I am feeling particularly nasty, I will put needles or itching powder on it.
The Vice President's Chair
Besides an excellent level of comfort, this black chair has wheels so the VP can spin when he is bored.
The Vice President's Desk
In front of you is the magnificent, dark wood beauty. On top of it is my new 500 MHz, Pentium III Gateway. I also have a writing area, pencil jugs, and other useful stuff.
And do not forget the remote control with all the buttons...
This is the end of the tour. If you want, you can return to the Online Shadow Clan home page. If you are feeling adventurous, go to my page.
If you absolutely need to contact me, you know my number. Be sure to close the door on your way out...or else...
is at fault for providing JR Ewing with his excellent office.
The following is gracefully blasting out of my stereo, freaking out our usually classical music-receptive clients.
