I thought I'd add something a little bit...different, if you will, to my page. I am a math major at Goucher College, and there's this really cool place called the XLAB where Math and CS majors hang out, banging their heads on the desk while trying to comprehend work.
What happens most of the time, though, is that we give up and draw on the XLAB'S white board. It's great!!!
On my webpage, I've decided to include some samples of such artwork, and even a few jokes about (and by) our favorite teacher to make fun of...
ENJOY!!!!
Ok, here's the VERY first anti-math picture of the year. The caption originally read "The state of life in PDE with Mark." Sadly, however, the title got cut out of the picture....
Some of the quotes also got cut out, so here they are:
"I don't care, shut up Allison!"
"It's intuitive!"
"Drink more coffee1"
See, Dr. Mark LOOOVEShis coffee!
(He also loves to say "it's intuitive!" a million times a day.)
In keeping with the idea of the idea of the love of coffee, we have the following:
However, for some students, coffee just isn't enough for life to make sense...
What's worse is that some of us dream of being murderers from time to time...
WARNING: WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO SEE IS SOMEWHAT VIOLENT, ALTHOUGH COMICALLY SO.
PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION AND AN OPEN MIND!!!!
See, this is what happens when you are allergic to dry erase markers and give way too difficult of take home tests.
Your students begin to hate you and also have fun making fun of your allergy.
Note that later on in the development of the marker chamber, we added a bloodied take home test... AND "The coffee becomes decaf" next to the picture.....
Speaking of Mark being allergic to markers....
A dear friend of mine, the same one responsible for the how many cups of coffee a day problem above,
adapted the Bagel Bites commercial song as follows:
You know: "Pizza in the mornin,
pizza in the evenin
pizza at supper time
When pizza's on a bagel, you can eat PIZZA anytime!!!
Wow, gotta love making fun of Mark Mckibben. Seriously, he's an AWESOME guy....
But I digress, we must continue to make fun of Mark some more!!!
So, one day in class, we were doing this really scary problem or proof or something.
Mark was using horribly greek letters that most people can't draw. That was bad enough.
Then, there was the problem. UGH!!!!!!!!
So, to lighten the mood, Mark came up with the following rhyme...then predicted that he would be written about in the XLAB. Hey, couldn't prove him wrong...
Speaking of all too difficult math problems given by Mark.... Here is what happens when you just can't take it anymore:
In keeping with the Super Suck Up theme, (if you don't know what that is, maybe you should've clicked on the above link when ASKED....) here is an excerpt from a recent conversation between SSU and an Anonymous CS student:
Super Suck Up: Apparently ECG enjoys cooking in his spare time.
Anonymous CS student: They make that much food with coffee in it???
And here's one between SSU and the Evil Department Chair:
Super Suck Up: Yeah
EDC: You realize you’re going to go insane?
SSU (under guise of being a normal student): Yes, but this will inspire plenty of XLAB art.
EDC: Oh, so you’re sacrificing your sanity for your artwork?
SSU: Pretty much.
And an example of such artwork is: (in case you didn't see enough already)
(Note that this illustrates the SSU story, or at least parts of it)
And now some Geeky Jokes:
1.) "A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems" (P. Erdos)
Addendum: American coffee is good for lemmas.
2.) A physicist and a mathematician are sitting in a faculty lounge. Suddenly, the coffee machine catches on fire. The physicist grabs a bucket and leap towards the sink, filled the bucket with water and puts out the fire. Second day, the same two sit in the same lounge. Again, the coffee machine catches on fire. This time, the mathematician stands up, got a bucket, hands the bucket to the physicist, thus reducing the problem to a previously solved one.
3.) A mathematician and a physicist agree to a psychological experiment. The (hungry) mathematician is put in a chair in a large empty room and his favorite meal, perfectly prepared, is placed at the other end of the room. The psychologist explains, "You are to remain in your chair. Every minute, I will move your chair to a position halfway between its current location and the meal." The mathematician looks at the psychologist in disgust. "What? I'm not going to go through this. You know I'll never reach the food!" And he gets up and storms out.
The psychologist ushers the physicist in. He explains the situation, and the physicist's eyes light up and he starts drooling. The psychologist is a bit confused. "Don't you realize that you'll never reach the food?" T he physicist smiles and replies: "Of course! But I'll get close enough for all practical purposes!"
4.) Top ten excuses for not doing homework:
I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames.
Isaac Newton's birthday.
I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn't actually reach it.
I have the proof, but there isn't room to write it in this margin.
I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to prove that it converged.
I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.
I locked the paper in my trunk but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it.
I couldn't figure out whether i am the square of negative one or i is the square root of negative one.
I took time out to snack on a doughnut and a cup of coffee.
I spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk.
I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle, but this morning I couldn't find it.
For more, go to Yahoo! and type "math jokes" in the search field...Good luck!
CLICK HERE to see something great that a friend made for me!
I really hope you enjoyed your stay in the land of the math geek!!!
Come back and join us soon!
