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15
Wednesday October 23 2002 Getting closer As
of October 18th 2002 my weight is 200.6 pounds. I was hoping to do a little
bit better but I'm still pretty happy so far. I can now wear a 36 inch
waist pants and size extra large tall in men's long sleeve t-shirts (my
favorite shirts in the whole world). Still not too much going on in my
personal life that would be relavent to this journal but would like to
say that I am able to bend in ways I never thought I could (yup if i wanted
to i could bite my own toe nails). I am a bit pissed off at the aid chick
in my doctor's office because she got on my case this week about all kinds
of shit that is NONE of her business. She yapped at me about birth control
pills which I refuse to take on the grounds that my hormones and period
are screwed up already and then she had the balls to say something about
my not working (i pay their fucking bills why should she care?). She made
me feel like she was my mom or something but then again My mom isn't crankie
like that. I was really rather pissed off at the whole visit but it's only
once a month and they did stop yelling at me to go to the stupid meetings.
That's it for now, I'ma take my saggy ass to bed.
Entry
14
Current
weight as of September 16 is 208.6. I can finally say I am almost there.
There's not much going on in my life that is worth talking about so I won't
bother to post personal stuff. I do feel a need to give you my current
list of things I can not eat for reasons of dumping syndrom just to fill
up some space. Most milk products other than skim milk, Pickled anything,
Rice, Breaed fried anything, and Pasta. I was never a real big fan of any
of this stuff so it doesn't bother me that I can't eat them. I found some
old pictures of myself from right before Bill and I got married and, all
I can say it wow! There is such a total difference between me now and that
fat girl. Eventually when I move this journal I'll put up a whole mess
of before and afters. I just haven't got the time to do it right now.
Entry
13
I'm
212 pounds right now. Saggy boobs and flappy under arms and all.... Just
a bit more to go until I am officially happy with myself.
Entry
12
Welp,
none of my clothes fit and for once they are too big! I've made it to 220
pounds (per my scale not the doctor's). There are a few things that have
been worring me such as the fact that I find I can eat more. I've started
weighing and messuring all my food so that I don't end up over eating and
defeat the surgery. My hair loss seems to have decreased a bit since I
started on the proteinex but I am told that it won't stop all together
for a month or so. Oh well that's why they make wigs! hehe now for the
silly personal side of weight loss! I've started noticing that my leg and
belly meats are starting to sag not to mention my boobs! Before surgery
I was a nice round 48DD and now I am a 36 long! I am going to look into
breast reduction after I've hit my second goal weight (200 even). Oh lemme
tell you about the anime convention I went to last weekend!!! It was sooo
awesome! We saw all kinds of great films that I have never heard of and
did a lot of toy shopping! I also got some great pics of costume people.
I'll post them at a later date along with my new post op piccies. About
moving this journal... I'm having some trouble getting the new site started
because the people I am in with are being super slow with adding content.
The journal should be moved there by wednesday august 07 and no later.
Don't worry there will be a redirection link on the main page of cluster
fly. I can't think of anything else to say at the moment so, see ya later!
Entry
11
I'm
at 228 (point I forgot) and some really interesting things are happening.
The first and I think best one is the fact that I can paint my own toenails!
My collar bones have also started to show and my size 24 shorts all but
fall off my butt when i walk too fast. Some other nice things have happened
too but lol those are way too personal for an angelfire site! I am a little
sad over the hair loss but it's my own fault for not getting enough protein
in my diet. It's sooo important for you new post ops to get protein even
if you have to drink that nasty proteinex just do it!! Oh almost forgot.
I am shutting down web graphics by cluster fly and moving the weight loss
surgery section to a new ad free site at nnie.com. Please be sure to make
a note of it. The new site is sort of a group project for Bill, my 2 best
friends (Ely and Kim) and myself. Kim is doing a bad gothic poetry expo,
Bill will be ranting and raving about what ever pisses him off, and Ely
will be doing music reviews and his "I'm so goth I'm dead" act. My part
in it is art, music, my weight loss surgery, and what ever else I am interested
in at the moment. Bill and I are also planning a monthly comic strip that
will be featured on the site. That's all for now.
Entry
10
Hehehe
because of a slight over sight by Bill and myself we lost our aol for the
week. I won't be back on line until friday after noon that is, if aol decides
they want to take our check. Then saturday after all my email and buddy
lists are switched over to AIM and hotmail we are canceling aol and setting
up a comcast cable modem account. I will miss talking to all my friends
in chat rooms but there is always aol private chats and IRC. What I won't
miss is the constant porn mail and spam IMs. Oh, oh yeah I almost forgot!
My weigh in at Doc Roe's was 239.2!!!! I am no longer classified as "morbidly
obese"! 19 more pounds so go till I hit my goal weight!
Entry
09
I feel
like I'm not loosing weight fast enough anymore. I'm starting to think
that this surgery which was my last best hope isn't going to work. No I
haven't been to the doctor this month and no I don't get on my scale, I
guess I am too scared to do that. I was actually thinking about getting
Bill to ask our primary care doctor for diet drugs so that I can take them,
I know it's not smart and would probably kill me but, damn it I am so sick
of sitting here in my fat jail. I can't sit here and type anymore. I'll
write again after this month's visit with Doc Roe.
Entry
08
As
of my last visit with Doc Roe my weight is now 252.5. That was May 9th.
Also today when we went to the mall I ran into Lane Giant (Lane Bryant)
and jeans I tried on said I was a size 24 it's only one dress size after
all that weight but I am still happy with it because it's something. Maybe
next month I will see 22. I haven't really been keeping track of the stuff
I eat but it's gone from soft yucky stuff to real meat and veggies. I've
noticed that crackers and other carbohydrates have started to make me feel
sick even when I have just a little bit. It's fine with me because I don't
like carbs much anymore anyway. I've also noticed that I can fit a little
more into my stomach with out getting that vile sicky feeling. This of
course upsets me mightily. I have to really watch how big my portions are
now so make sure I keep losing the weight.
Entry
07
It's been a while since I
posted and again I have no real excuse other than laziness. Before I get
to the theme of this post I guess I could fill you in on my progress....
In 7 weeks I have lost 44.5 pounds. I'm a little upset over the slowing
of the weight loss these last 2 weeks (only 6 pounds) but it's still something.
I guess I just have to push myself more.
Entry
06
I know
I know I take forever to update my pages but I can't help it. I'm a busy
girl with all the slacking and sleeping I do. I do have some good news
to report though! As of last tuesday I lost another 7.2 pounds bringing
my grand total to 38.5. I was a little worried at the end of week 3 I only
lost one pound so I thought I was gonna do shitty this week too. The only
thing I did different was extra walking and extra water (up to 10 cups
a day).
Entry
05
Last
tuesday when I went for my weekly post surgery visit to Dr. Roe and he
bumped me up one food level I asked him "since tuna is on the list for
phase 3 does that mean I can have sushi too?" He said " well if it stays
down I guess you can have it." So like the trooper I am I went out that
friday and got a little premade sushi meal from the local super market,
then I took one bite of a california roll and man I felt like I wanted
to die!! As soon as that rice hit my stomach there was all this pain! It
wasn't just stomach pain no no it was EVERYWHERE! My chest went tight my
arms went numb and ugh it was just horrid. Thank goodness we were already
in the car and half way home cause I would not have made it home with out
making a mess in poor Bill's car. It's such a shame that I love sushi so
much :( Oh well I'll find a way around it. Maybe I'll just eat the fish,
it's the best part anyway.
Entry
04
Yesterday
was my 2 week visit with Dr. Roe. He looked at the little hole in my incision
and said that it was infected purely on the bases that it's not healing
(it's rather deep for a little hole). So now, I have to clean it and bandage
it everyday and hope that it doesn't turn into a second belly button. He
did say that if it doesn't heal nice he can fix it for me when he does
my tummy tuck which I guess is a good thing. Oh you wanna know my weight
as of yesterday it's 266.4. Yes I'm happy wouldn't you be! I guess I'm
gonna reach my first goal way before August!
Entry
03
Things are starting to feel
a bit better for me this week. I can move around more freely with out too
much pain and I'm actually looking forward to getting some more activity
in soon. I've been going out with Bill a lot around the city, to movies
and the craft store and things like that and today I even went for a tiny
one mile walk down the street. It felt nice to get up out of this place
and do something constructive for once.
Entry
02
Yesterday was the first post
op doctor's visit. It went well, for the most part. I got my staples out
and was bumped up to phase 2 foods (semi solids) I also lost 25 pounds
since surgery. I can't wait until I can actually see my weight loss. Man
that would be awesome! My first goal is 250 and I am hoping to se that
sometime around August maybe I will be lucky and make it you think?
Entry
01
Earlier today I had written
this horrid sob story about how much pain I was in and how much I hated
myself for doing this surgery but now after I've had time to think it all
over I say fuck it! It's done and over with and I am stuck like this. May
as well follow the program and see what happens. I will say that if I knew
in advance how much this shit was gonna hurt I would have never gotten
to the hospital!
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