SIGNS OF WEAR

"OLD" IS WHEN:

Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one, I can't do both!

"OLD" IS WHEN:

Your friends compliment you on   your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.              

"OLD" IS WHEN:

A sexy babe catches your fancy   and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

"OLD" IS WHEN:

Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

"OLD" IS WHEN:

You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to             go along.      

"OLD" IS WHEN:

When you are cautioned to slow     down by the doctor instead of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN:

"Getting a little action" means I don't need to take any fiber today.

"OLD" IS WHEN:

"Getting lucky"means you find your car in the parking lot.        

"OLD" IS WHEN:

An "all-nighter" means not getting up to pee!