Refined Speach

There was a rather old-fashioned lady, always quite delicate and elegant, especially in language. She and her husband were planning a week's vacation in Florida, so she wrote to a campground and asked for a reservation.

She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped,but didn't know how to ask about the toilet facilities. She just could not bring herself to write the word "toilet" in her letter. After much deliberation, she finally came up with the term "bathroom commode". But after writing that down, she still thought she was being too forward, so she rewrote the entire letter and referred to the "bathroom commode" merely as the "BC".

"Does the campground have its own BC?" is what she actually wrote. Well, the gampground owner wasn't old-fashioned at all and when he got the letter, he just couldn't figure what the woman was talking about. That "BC" business really stumped him. He showed the letter to several couples, but they couldn't imagine what the lady meant either. So the campground owner finally came to the conclusion that the lady must be asking about the location of the nearest Baptist Church, sat down and wrote the following reply:

DEAR MADAM,

I regret the delay in answering your letter, but I now take the pleasure of informing you that a BC is located 9 miles north of the campground and is capable of seating 250 people at one time. It is located in a beautiful pine grove and is open only on Sundays and Wednesdays. I admit it is quite a distance away if you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to know that many people take their lunch along and make a day of it. They usually arrive early and stay late.

My daughter met her husband in the BC. Sometimes it is so crowded there are five to a seat. It may interest you to know that right now there is a supper planned to raise money to buy more seats. They are going to hold it in the basement of the BC. It pains me very much not to be able to go more regularly, but it is surely not due to a lack of desire on my part. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in cold weather.

If you decide to come to our campground, perhaps I could go with you the first time you go and sit with you and introduce you to all the other folks. We will be sure to get a seat up front where you can be seen by everyone. Remember, we are a friendly community.

Sincerely, the Campground Owner.

~~Author Unknown~~