Most of you know them as IT but we refer to them in the Corps as IM (Information Management) 

I have been trying to finish up getting my name changes. You never realize how many things you need to change when you get married. The last thing I needed to do was to get my name changed with the Corps. It sounded simple at first but has turned into a nightmare.

First I needed to do what is called and RPA (Request for Personnel Action). So I did that and sent along a copy of my new license and a certified copy of my marriage license. Once that was complete and they gave me my SF 50 I was suppose then notify our IM department so they could make the changed in the email system.

Over a month ago I called IM to let them know that everything with personnel had gone through and I needed IM to do their magic. They informed me that I needed to get a new CAC card first. Unlike the district folks we here in the field need to go to the National Guard Depot to get new cards. We have to make appointments which is always a pain because usually only has slots open two weeks after you need them. Every time I have been there, there has never  been anyone else waiting.  So I made an appointment and drove over to the National Guard Unit to get my card. When I got there I was about 20 minutes early and the guy made me wait in the hall while he read the newspaper until they clock struck 11. Then he called me in and told me that the machine was broken. What you couldn’t tell me that when I walked in? So he sent me away and told me to come back in two days which I did. This time apparently I needed to have a form signed by my supervisor so they sent me away again. I was getting very aggrevated by this point. Then I found out that our security office was going to be making a trip up here with there CAC machine and that they would take care of me then. So I emailed IM to let them know what was going on.

So that brings us to today. I came in this morning and was first in line to get my new card. It went smoothly except for the fact that they kept wanting to put a “p” in my last name. With my new card in hand I called IM to tell them that I have my new card. This is our conversation.

IM: IM Help Desk This is Barry

ME: Hey Barry its Rebecca…I have my new card.

IM: (sounding a little confused) Okay?

ME: Barry you told me to call you when I got my new card with my name change on it.

IM: (still confused) UmmmOkaaaay?

ME: I emailed you like a month ago about the fact that I got married and needed to get my name changed. You told me to call you when I had my new card.

IM: Is this your first card?

ME: Barry I have worked for the Corps for 4 years now.

IM: So this isn’t your first?

ME: (sigh) No this is not my first card.

IM: Well what is it you want us to do?

ME: Change my name in they system.

IM: Well you need to send me an email with the information.

ME: I sent you an email over a month ago.

IM: Who did you send it to.

ME: I sent it through Ann and she sent it to you.

IM: Well you need to send it to me. Ann has been out of the office all week.

ME: No I sent it a month ago.

IM: Okay? Well I will let them know but you will need to send me an email.

ME: Barry I can’t send it again because I can’t log onto my computer. I have a new card and need you to change the name in the system so when I log on the names will match.

IM: Oh that’s right. Okay hold on.

ME: (I wait as he types some things on the computer.)

IM: Okay you should be able to log in. What is your new name?

ME: Thomson without a “P”

Barry: No “P”

ME: Yeah it is T-H-O-M-S-O-N

IM: T-H-O-M-P

ME: No there no P

IM: Gotcha! We’ll take care of it.

So I hung up the phone and waited about an hour or so then logged into Outlook to see if the name change had been done. What did I see?

Rebecca G. Thompson

SCREAMMMMM!!!!!

I called IM Back.

IM: IM Help Desk. This is Barry.

ME: Yes Barry it Rebecca again

IM: Uh huh What can I do now?

ME: You spelled my name wrong

IM: Let me see (pulls it up on his screen) Rebecca Thompson. Is there two “b’s” in Rebecca?

ME: No the first name is right. You put a “p” in my last name

IM: There is no “P” in Thompson.

ME: No it should be T-H-O-M-S-O-N. It should read Rebecca G. Thomson SAW

IM: Okay I will fix it.

So I hung up and waited about an hour and re-checked. This time the first and last name is right but they forgot my middle initial and my District code. So I call IM back.

IM: IM Hel…

ME: (interrupted) Barry it Rebecca. It still isn’t right. You forgot my middle initial and the district code. (See without the District code I get lost in the global address book and district notices won’t show up in my box).

IM: Huh? Oh yeah I see now. (He tries some things) Yeah I am going to have to work in it.

He then hangs up the phone. While at lunch I get a call from him stating that someone is working on it and it will be fixed tomorrow. Tomorrow? So what am I suppose to do till then? I called him back and discussed some option and asked him about forwarding my mail which I know can be done because they did it for people who move to other districts. He wasn’t sure how to set that up. So now I have to wait till tomorrow to have email access. I have already been yelled at about not responding to 3 urgent emails this morning.

Our IM department was taken over by contractors (Lockeed Martin) about a year ago and we were promised that things will be much better. They have actually gotten worse. I don’t’ know where they find these IT people. I have gotten so mad at 2 of them that I went off and made one of them cry. They now refuse to talk to me. We have 3 computers that need to be fixed and have been after them to come and fix them. They called me two weeks ago and asked if someone could load them up and bring them to Wilmington on their next trip. First of all…it isn’t my job to disconnect and haul computers. Secondly…Wilmington is 2.5 hours away and we don’t have anyone going down there for awhile. They said they don’t have a budge to travel. They are contractors…they don’t need a budge to travel. They do the work and charge the Corps. I am just so frustrated I could spit.

I am not a computer expert but I could do their job better than they do. There have been a few times when I have fixed some computers here in the office because the staff hasn’t gotten any help from the District. Next time I fix something I need to ask for a charge number so I can get paid for my time.

Tanya….Steve Jones just walked into the office.