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The Prati Gai

The Prati Gai are the commandments of the church, the rules and tenets which the devoted Yaddite should attempt to follow as closely as possible in order to achieve oneness with the Cosmic All (unless you really dont want to). They are listed below in point form so that they are easily accessible to the Chosen and in a clear text so that even the Tank Top Triumvirate can read them. Just because we are holy doesnt mean we aren't simple.

The 13 Prati Gai of the Church

  1. Thou shalt worship only Yadrutas-Krowylno, the God whose name is hidden in the sands of time and the waves of Coogee beach
  2. Thou shalt worship thy God at every opportunity, in the holy temples of pubs, bars and beer gardens
  3. Thou shalt do no work on the holy days of Sunday through Friday. Saturday is the day set aside for work and the others for holy meditation and sunbathing.
  4. Thou shalt aspire to drive Ferrari's, as they are a good vehicle and worth of being daydreamed about
  5. Thou shalt sunbath at every opportunity, including during work hours
  6. Thou shalt bedeck thyself in Sharkbait Clothing, for it is holy apparel and worthy of being worn by the righteous sunbather
  7. Thou shalt only drink alcohol in the two places holy to him - inside and outside
  8. Thou shalt devote thy worship to each patron saint as befitting their causes. Each saint shall be subject to daydreams whilst sunbathing on your 6 day weekend, preferably in a menage a trois
  9. Thou shalt take the place of the patron saint of your choice in the day dream at will
  10. Thou shall spread the holy word of the church via email, preferably work email, because the electronic pulses are pleasing to him, plus postage wastes money better spent on the holy articles of alcohol, Sharkbait clothing and posters of the patron saints.
  11. If thou dost disobey thine prati gai, thou shalt suffer the wrath of the falling keg and lose thy poster access, till repentance via the daydream has been sufficiently accomplished
  12. All holy bequests shall be handled by the ordained reverends, as Yadrutas-Krowylno is too busy sunbathing at the moment to handle his flock.
  13. Yadrutas decision in all matters is final. No correspondence will be entered into

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