TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE XMAS
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE XMAS
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
AND ALL THROUGH THE HOUSE
NOT A WHITE DOG WAS STIRRING,
NOT EVEN A MOOSE SPOUSE!
WITH BOO BOO IN HER TEE SHIFT
AND ME JUST OUT OF MY SHOES
WERE ABOUT TO SETTLE IN
FOR A LONG WINTER SNOOZE.
THE DOGGIES ALL CURLED
AT THE FOOT OF THE BED,
WHILE VISIONS OF STEAKBONES
DANCED IN THEIR HEADS
WHEN OUT ON THE DECK
WE HEARD THE BOARDS CREAKIN,
NIKKIS EARS PERKED UP
AND FROSTI STARTED FREAKIN
I JUMPED OUT OF BED
AND PUT ON MY PANTS,
RAN TO THE BACK DOOR
AND JUST BY CHANCE
I LOOKED THROUGH THE DOOR
AND HAPPENED TO SEE
A LITTLE FAT MAN
LOOKING BACK AT ME.
HE WAS DRESSED ALL IN FUR
AND WAS QUITE ROUND TOO
BUT HE SORT OF LOOKED
LIKE HE BELONGED IN A ZOO!
THEN HE DID SOMETHING
I THOUGHT WAS REAL CRUDE
HE STOOPED TO THE FLOOR
AND ATE THE DOG'S FOOD!!!
THIS WAS SO STRANGE
I THOUGH TO MYSELF
WHY WAS SANTA SO HUNGRY
WASN'T HIS LUNCH PACKED BY AN ELF??
I KNEW I WAS SLEEPY
BUT COULD I BE DREAMING
COULD SANTA BE DOING
SOMETHING SO DEMEANING?
I PUT MY HANDS UP
AND RUBBED MY TIRED OLD EYES
AND WHAT DID I SEE
MUCH TO MY SUPRIZE?
THERE AT THE FOOD BOWL
JUST LIKE IN "HIGH NOON"
WE STOOD EYE TO EYE
ME AND A BIG FAT RACOON!!!
WE BOTH SCREECHED REAL LOUD
WE MADE OUR EARS SORE
I RAN BACK IN THE HOUSE
HE RAN OUT THE BACK DOOR!!
THE DOGS WERE BARKING
THEY KNEW SOMETHING WAS OUT BACK
I WAS THINKING
I HOPE I DON'T HAVE A HEART ATTACK!!
I PEEKED THROUGH THE DOOR
AND HE WAS GONE AND FED
I HUSHED THE DOGS
AND WENT BACK TO BED.
THE SNOW WAS FALLING
ABOUT ANKLE DEEP
BOO BOO ASKED "WAS IT SANTA?"
I REPLIED "YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE ME--
I LOVE YOU, GO BACK TO SLEEP"
KIRK - Written November 25th, 2004
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