Part IV

She roused to the sweet, mouthwatering aroma of cinnamon buns filling the darkened bedroom. Turning over, she watched as he moved about the room, lighting the vanilla scented candles that were laid out on various surfaces. When the room awoke with a warm, welcoming glow, he brought the tray of food over to the bed.

Seeing the look of delight in her eyes, he smiled ruefully, “I didn’t make them.”

Donning his silk shirt that had sat at the edge of the bed, she rolled the sleeves up a bit and buttoned a few of the buttons. “Don’t care, breakfast in bed should never be turned down.”

As he took a bite of the melon from the bowl, he watched Dara butter her cinnamon bun carefully. He couldn’t help but be incredibly aroused by the site of her in his shirt, her smooth skin moving against the fabric, a remarkable glow about her. Taking a seat next to her on the bed, the two ate their early morning meal. Dara would toss bits of warm bread at Johnny and he’d catch it in his mouth, while he in turn fed her the bits of fruit he’d cut up for their feast. After a bit, Dara playfully made a wild throw, giggling as Johnny nearly dove off the bed to catch it.

“You did that on purpose,” he growled suggestively. “Me?” she replied innocently, backing from him as he crawled towards her. Johnny nodded, closing the gap between them. “Naughty girl,” he said, and before she could make her escape, he’d pulled her to him. As Johnny placed himself between her thighs, Dara moaned when his hardened member pressed against her intimately. She buried her face into the collar of his shirt, his powerful scent making her ache inside and she became dimly aware that once again she was throwing caution into the wind and going after what seemed frighteningly natural. How was it that someone who’d been raised on the straight and narrow would in an instant, fling herself into uncertainty, letting every unforeseen moment happen breathlessly?

She wasn’t sure, but being breathless and uncertain had made her feel more alive than ever before. And for some mystical reason, she had chosen Johnny of all the people in the world, to be her companion.

Or maybe it was the other way around.

*~*

Later, she rested her head against him, her lithe leg draped over his muscular thigh. One of his strong arms encircled her protectively, the other rested against the rise of her hip.

“Where did you go?”

“When?”

“Earlier, you went to get breakfast.” Her voice trailed off as he released a heavy sigh. “Something wrong?”

He shook his head. “No, but you might think so.”

Hearing the uncertainty in his voice, Dara’s gaze rose to meet his. “What do you mean?”

“Emily. She fell asleep in the foyer. I put her in the room across the hall.”

Dara’s eyes widened. She was surprised, but not as anxious as she thought she might be. It was a very real possibility that Emily could expose their relationship, to whomever and for whatever reason but it didn't concern her too much. She was slowly starting to accept the idea of letting the cards fall where they may. If it came out, she would deal with it. Until then, she would focus on the positive.

"I never thought I'd get the chance." Johnny's voice was awestruck as he remembered his daughter's breath against his skin when he had carried her. He'd closed his eyes, storing the moment away in the back of his mind, as he had done so many times before when she had smiled at him or let out a delighted laugh. He remembered everything.

Dara smiled before broaching the topic that rested heavily on her mind. "You think maybe you should take a chance with her?"

Johnny's head rested against the pillow. "You know it's not safe."

"It's not safe for me either, but I'm here, with you."

He gazed at the ceiling, contemplating her words. "It's different."

"I know," she agreed, "but these scraps that you get from her aren't good enough anymore. Not for you and not for her. You killed a man for her and you removed 2 others from power. Now, she's asleep across the hall."

"The writing's on the wall," he finished. Dara nodded, "in big bold letters. Do you want to control the information or do you want to watch her find out another way?"

Lacing his hand with hers, Johnny felt the fear of losing Emily, but he knew Dara was right. "If she knows, it doesn't mean your love for her dies. It doesn't mean you can't protect her or watch her grow up." Dara's soothing voice calmed his worries. "There is a risk, there's always a risk, but even if she rejects you, she'll know. You are her Father and that void in her life, that special place is still filled by you. That connection will never die."

"She'll hate me for Zander and for betraying Jason."

Dara shrugged. "It doesn't sound like much now, but she'll get past it. She'll grow up, she'll let go of the anger and see the truth. She'll learn it came from a place of love, just as she did with Jason's lies about Michael. You're her Father, and no matter what, that will always be there in her mind." Snuggling closer to Johnny, Dara chuckled. "I know I sound cold and analytical, but I've seen enough broken families and terrible tragedies walk through a courtroom door to know one thing for certain."

"Family is family."

Johnny swallowed hard. "I've never had a real family before." Dara squeezed his hand. "Well, you do now. You have your daughter and you have me."

Johnny turned his head suddenly towards her. "I have you?"

The wonder and surprise in his tone made Dara's nerve stumble. "If-if you want."

Johnny's formerly worried expression melted into one of genuine joy and warmth. "Yeah, I do."

*~*

He waited until she'd finished the breakfast he'd prepared for her. He knew Dara was still fast asleep upstairs. He watched as she laced up her shoes before gathering enough courage to sit her down. With a nervous smile, he finally spoke. "I, uh, I wanted to tell you that I knew your Mother."

Emily frowned slightly. "Monica?"

Johnny shook his head. "No, I mean, your other Mother." Emily's frown remained as his words sank in. "Oh," she said, still confused by what he meant. Johnny leaned forward, knowing it was now or never.

"I knew Paige a long time ago."

"You did?"

"Emily, there's something I need to tell you."

Emily heard something in Johnny's voice that sent all nerves into mass overdrive. He was looking at her in a way she'd never anticipated. He knew her Mother? How? Why was he telling her this? Then suddenly, as if struck by a bolt of lightning, the realization came hard and fast. She suddenly hated the strong intuitive senses she'd had all her life. Her eyes widened, not needing to hear the words. "Oh, God," she said.

Johnny's brow creased with concern. "Emily," he started, reaching towards her. Emily pulled her hand away, as if terrified that his touch would scald her. "Oh, God," she repeated. Quickly, she was on her feet and backing from a situation that was too much for her to handle. Johnny rose. "Emily," he said, his voice now begging her to stop. "Let me explain things."

Emily shook her head violently, "no, no, no. I can't, I can't do this now."

Things were going terribly wrong. "Emily!" His voice rose several octaves and like a jack rabbit, it triggered her urge to flee. She was out the door and down the fire escape staircase before he blinked. "Emily!" he shouted in vain. "Shit!" Rushing back inside, his head pounded as he relayed instructions over the phone to ensure Emily made it home safetly.

Dara rushed down the stairs, a stricken look on her face. "What happened?" she cried.

"I fucked up." He could barely fathom how terribly he'd messed up. "She freaked and bolted. I just fumbled along like an idiot." Slamming a fist onto the desktop, he angrily chastized himself for his blunder. Dara had jumped at his outburst, but understood it at the same time.

"She knows."

Johnny's arm swung out dramatically. "Yeah, she knows and now she's out there, scared and confused because I couldn't take two seconds to figure out how I was going to tell her."

"Do you want to go after her?"

Johnny shook his head as violently as Emily had earlier. "No, God no. I won't send her screaming into traffic. Rick's on her and he'll stay until I say otherwise."

Leading him over to the chesterfield, she gave him a few moments to gather his wits before speaking. "What do you want to do now?"

Running a tense hand through his hair, Johnny took a deep breath. "I want to make things right."

"And what's the best way to do that?"

Johnny took another breath and gazed at the roaring fire in front of him. Dara's calm manner and soothing voice allowed him to slow down and really think things through. He was greatful for it. In the span of a few hours, his entire life had changed. A woman who once sought to put him in prison was now his closest ally and the daughter he had denied his entire life was suddenly aware of him. The choice he made would affect them all and have ripple effects for those connected to them. "I have to end it."

Dara frowned, not sure of what he meant. "Johnny?"

"I have to disappear."

He was up and moving in a flash, determination in every stride. Dara watched as he pulled on a jacket. "What is it? Where are you going?"

Powered by clear intentions, he clasped her hands in his, bringing them up to his face. Gently he kissed both. "I know what I have to do but it means me leaving and you not seeing me or knowing where I am for awhile."

Alarm filled her and she clutched onto him. "I don't like how this sounds."

He chuckled, his warm eyes reassuring her. "I know, but you have to trust me on this."

Seeing there was no way she could change his mind, Dara could only ask, "What are you going to do?"

"See some old friends."

*~*

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