*Nsync Timeline*

• October 17, 1971- In Clarion, Pennsylvania a baby boy with an abnormaly high voice is born. His name is Christopher Kirkpatrick and is immediatley dubbed 'the funniest person ever born.'
• 1971, a day later- Chris, as his family now calls him, tells his first dirty joke. His mother is delighted and announces that her son is 'going to be the next big thing.'
• 1972-Chris's first singing lesson at the young age of 2. His coach later quits because of damage done to his ears.
• August 8, 1976-In Maryland Joshua Chasez is born and quickly nicknamed JC for no apparent reason. He is also the only child to have 'perfect pitch.'
• January 28, 1977-In Brooklyn, NY an Italian nurse delivers a record breaking 12 pound baby boy named Joseph.
• 1977, about 5 minutes after birth-Joey mouths his first words...
• 1979-In the small town of Clinton, Mississippi a quiet little boy shly enters the hostile world. His name is James, but his parents decide that Lance will do just fine. They also make sure that his name ends in an N so his full name is changed to James LansteN Bass. Both parents are unsure as to why they did this.
• 1980-Lance says 'poppy', which results in his first spanking. He vows never to cuss again and promises to 'always be a good boy for his mommy.'
• 1981-In Memphis, Tennesse an extremly attractive baby boy is born with bouncy curly hair and amazing abs. All the nurses immediatley jump him and dubb him the 'hottest baby ever.'
• 1982-Justin mouths his first word...
• 1983-Justin spent this year sucking on a platinum plated pacifier and perfecting his 'ohhh yeah' sounds.
• 1984-Lance is now in kindergarden, having fun playing house with the girls and having tea parties.
• Christmas 1984-Justin gets a gold toy Mercedes Benz valued at over 5,000 dollars. Chris is living in poverty and recieves a carrot to keep him occupied. JC recieves a pillow and blanket and states that he won't see his parents for the next 10 years because he'll be sleeping. Joey recieves a year's supply of free lasagna from 'Earl's house of Italian Grub.' He is the happiest he's ever been. And, last, Lance recieves a horse and over the next 3 years just can't stop saying 'Giddy Up.'
• 1985-Chris gets his drivers license and recieves his first car a week later after saving up $200 shoveling dung in the hot sun.
• 1988-Justin is enrolled in voice lessons, after his mother realizes that her son could make a killing.
• 1989-Chris begins to work his way through college, his dream is to be a stand up comedien at the local 'Funny Town Bar and Grill.'
• December of 1989-Chris unexpectidly runs into a fellow classmate of his, Howie. Chris, for some reason, does not like Howie. He yells, "get back to the street you boy." Howie immediatly contacts Lou Pearlman with a 'great idea for a new band.'
• 1990-JC leaves normalcy and becomes a member of the Mickey Mouse Club. He acts on the show for the next 5 years being forced to participate in crazy skits and funny songs. He loves this clean-cut life.
• 1992-Lance is shoved into another locker back in Mississippi. He yells at the bully, "well, I'll be famous someday so...poo foo on you." The bully is confused.
• 1992-Justin makes his debut on 'Star Search.' He's decked out in cowboy boots and a belt buckle the size of Texas. Unfortunately, and to much surprise, he gets beaten by a girl. His Mom is very mad.
• 1993-Justin makes up for his loss by landing a role on The Mickey Mouse Club. Here he meets JC and they become fast friends. He also meets a peppy, and sometimes annoying, girl named Britney. Britney spends the next years following around Justin and saying, "hit me baby one more time." Britney Immediatley decides to become the next 'sex symbol.'
• Later that year-Britney starts to cut her shirts so she can show off her mid-drift. Justin is entriged, they start to date, but later break up due to Britteny's need to 'shimmy' around everywhere.
• 1994-Justin and JC are fired from the show. They vow to get 'donald and minnie back' and 'show that stupid mouse.'
• 1995-Chris is watching TV in his run-down apartment and sees 'The Backstreet Boys' . He becomes extremly pissed and immediatly starts brainstorming group ideas. 'I'll get that Howie back,' he yells. The neighboors are frightened.

• May of 1995-Joey miraculously graduates from highschool. He becomes the 'hit of the Fatone family.'
• June of 1995-Chris calls Justin, who calls JC, now they're NSC. Chris contacts Joey about his group, Joey accepts. Now they're NSYC ...Chris decides that will never do. Justin finds Lance, through his vocal coach, Lance is flown down to Orlando. The guys meet, sing the Star Spangled Banner together, Justin screams-"That was da bomb diggity, man, you bes in da group. NO DIGGITY." Lance wonders if it was a mistake to audition.
• October 22, 1995-'Nsync's first official show at Pleasure Island. The show was a huge success despite Chris's joke telling at intermission, Lance's dancing, JC falling aslepp, Joey eating during a song, and Justin talking. 'Nsync is officially on the road to success.
• 1996-Since nobody in the U.S. likes them yet, 'Nsync decides to head over to Europe. Since no one can understand what they're saying they all agree it would be a good idea.
• 1997-'Nsync is a huge success in Europe, they go platinum and have numerous #1 hits. They contemplate going to the U.S., but decide that might not be best since 'Backstreet fever' is running high. Chris carrys a picture of Howie in his pocket and throws darts at it every once and while.
• 1998-The boys get a record deal in America and sign to RCA. Before they can be seen in public they change their looks in order to appear more 'American looking.' Lance is told that he must loose the cowboy boots and bowl hair-cut. He is crushed.
• 1999-The year of the Synch, to say the least. They sell millions of records, shirts, posters, videos, books, and anything else they can stick their faces on. They have an enormous following, and it doesn't matter to millions of girls that they wrote 'Giddy Up.'
• 2000-Nsync goes on tour, yet again. But, after a Kansas City show they are forbidden to come back to the arena due to the amount of food Joey consumed. 'Nsync continues their tour; but after each performance they are 'forbidden to come back to the venue' for various reasons. Justin wonders why his hottness isn't working anymore. He becomes depressed, which forces him to talk normally. The guys are stunned...
• 2001-'Nsync who? After too many bad performances they had no where to play and with the increasingly popular 'Get em Jumpin' boys' 'Nsync is de-throwned as pop's #1 poster boy-band.
• 2002-'Nsync, sadly, breaks up after the release of their fourth album, "Why do you people not like us? Remember, Justin's in the group." They end their 7 year run.
• 2003-Justin begins his solo career with the release of his first album, "It bes me Justin Timberlake, wadup girl?" Though all critics dismise him old 'Nsync fans go crazy. He goes multi-platnium and is scheduled to open for a new boy band. "Nsync is gone, and now we're here." Justin is happy.
• 2005-JC is the proud owner of a blues club. Sometimes, when he's good, they even let him sing.
• 2007-Lance finds the 'meaning of life' while on a hike in the rolling hills of Montana. He lives with his horse named; Toby #2. He is happy.
• 2009-Joey has successfuly attained circus weight and is the owner of 'Joey's Stop and Go Pit Shop.' He is married to a woman names Bertha.
• 2011-Chris is working at 'Universal Studios; The Future.' They wouldn't let him perform so he sells tickets to 'The End of The World' and tells people of the good old days. He still has dreds.
• 2012-Justin is still an extremly popular solo artist, he runs into JC while at his Blues Club. They remanise about 'what was' and decide to call up the other guys and do a reunion tour. Justin sees an oppertunity to become even richer. Later that night he marrys a model, and 48 hours later they divorce.
• 2013-The guys go on their reunion Tour called, "We may be old and fat, but we're still 'Nsync. And, remember, Justin's in the group." Credicts, once again, tear the guys apart. But dedicated 'Nsync fans show up in the mass's and every show is sold out.
• 2014-After the tour the band releases a 'Greatest Hits' album. They go in the studio in hopes to ignite that same 'Nsync majic that was there before. Lance becomes upset, though, because they still won't let him sing. Lance finds the group 'sinful and unholy' and they break up yet again.
• 2015-Justin is kinda running low on cash so he decides to release yet another solo album. This time it's called 'Me, Myself, and I. BOO YA...I bes hot." It's a world-wide success. Once again, he is happy.
• 2016-Chris decides to run for president, but then declines after learning he'd have to 'loose the dreds.' He lives out the rest of his life as a side-show act in circus's, he is called, 'The amaing guy who use to be in 'Nsync, but now is old and fat.' He later marrys a clown named bo-bo.
• 2018-JC marrys a nice lounge singer he met at his club. They live out the rest of their lives together. They attend church everyday and visit Lance in the rolling hills every time they get a chance.
• 2020-Justin is still extremly popular. Everyone marvels at his success, they wonder, 'how can he be so old, but still so with it?'
• 2022-Unfortunately Justin's curls begin to fall out and he is immediately put on the back-burner. It's ok, though, because he invests all his money in a new clothing line called 'no diggity' which successfully fills his pocket with buku bucks.
• 2026-Lance is now a registered Orlando Florida minister. He does small weddings and is now going by the name; minister taz. His license is later revoked.

• 2035-Joey unfortunately dies after eating an Italian sausage. The guys go to the funeral and try to sing, though it doesn't quit work out. Lance once again becomes angry and leaves.
• 2052-Lance has a heart attack after hearing someone say 'poopy.' He is 73.
• 2066-Justin dies during a routine face life and buffing. He is 85.
• 2097-JC celebrates the big 120 and is inducted into the 'Oldest Boy Band Dude' hall of fame. His last words are, "Well at least me and my bestest buddies will finally be 'together again.' I've learned that we're not 'forever young' and even if you do give someone the 'best of your life' you still can't always crack the 'riddle.' Oh well, at least I can 'giddy up' into heaven and say, 'God must have spent a little more time on you.' Well, it's time to go 'sailing' on up to that big music box in the sky. I won't have 'everything I own' and I might 'want some stuff back,' but at least I won't be 'tearin up my heart.' I just have one last request before I leave this wonderous world, 'I need love.' I really wish I didn't 'drive myself crazy' and I wish 'you didn't drive me crazy.' But, 'I just wanna be with you' cuz 'you got it.' Ok, I'll go now because 'I want it that way.' Hold on a minute...."