I've been really stressed out all day over school in general and just sorta in a bad mood over it. But then I want to a Yale Political Union debate, and it made things better. The last speech really got me thinking. First of all it freaked me out because the speaker said a few things about how people in the armed forces are conditioned to be a little less human and able to kill other humans. And that really freaks me out when I think about my friends in the armed forces.
But what really got me thinking is the thought of what it means to be human. My major concern was int he case of parents trying to shelter their children. Does this preserverence of hope, faith, and positive almost idealistic perspective on humanity make them more human, at least intellectually so that they won't be encompassed in more primitive forms of living and social and possibly emotional callousness? Or is it more human to understand more fully what we can consider the "human condition" and see how people realistically live and to understand the downfalls of life? I discussed this a little with the speaker in question, trying to relate it back to his speech considering humanity and military conditioning. And he conceeded that it was rather impossible to really know either way and the question was rather unanswerable.
I'm convinced, however, that being fully human might involve a balance of both of these. Not a moderation, however, but a full understanding of both sides. To be exposed and to be aware and to understand how society really is and know all its downfalls, but to also be able to keep a faith in the good of humanity and to be hopeful for better, etc. Perhaps this is the balance I'm currently trying to achieve, as well as being a part of "both worlds" of common existence as well as intellectuality. I wonder if anything can really come of this though. More specifically, what this strive for such a balance means in reference to my life in general.
As far as that goes, by the way, I've realized that I don't really have that much of a clue. Someone asked me today if I was considering going to Grad. School, and I said I didn't really need it and wasn't really planning on it. Now it's an amusing game between a few friends of mine and I that I "change futures weekly" but I realize that most people don't know this and rather than claim to know, by stating my opinion for the moment, I should just state that I have not really found something solidly planned on. Someday I'll get it right, hopefully.