Poems

This heart sits alone
Just wants all to be perfect
As clouds skim across 
A bright moon
The air she breathes is tainted
With evil, pain and hatred
Confussed and lost
She wanders
Takes wrong roads
This shining moon guides her badly
Scared of the future
Terrified by the past
This heart sits alone. 

March 19, 2000


 
Pavane

Black and white, like a picture
Straight lines and sharp corners
Sheet upon sheet
Reeks of solitude
Flat
Not understood
Lines and dots
Unsymmetrical and poorly located
This story isn't untold
It is soft and gentle
Like wind under a feather
Softly carrying the shapes of waves
She hears the saga of the blind world 
It lives in her mind
Of love
Of life
The confusion explains soft touches
Of the night
Sighs 
And betrayal, treacherous thought
An unsure ending
Harmonic, even swells
No words are spoken
No visions are seen
This life ends with 
The unsopken sounds
As graceful as it began
Fades into the night.

March 19, 2000 



His eyes hesitantly slide down the
Length of her delicate body
Catching every impluse,
Just as mist rolls over the 
Smooth surface of the earth, and
Waves lick at the sandy
Barrier between land and water.
Dim light creates shadows
Over his supple lips that
Caress each fingertip
As though they are
Most precious.
His eyes close, divine lashes
Whisper over her cheek
And deep blue, they slowly open.
Gazing into her well-acquainted eyes,
Defined by tears.
Captivated by reality
Love, they discovered.

October 12 '99






His cold breath brought a chill down her back
Icy blue eyes she no longer could penetrate
For all that she had surrendered to him
And no compassion in his touch
No feeling in his arms when he held her
Quiet now
Shy
As a child after punishment
He cares, but she is invisible to him now
When he reaches his hand out he knows not who holds it
And the heart he's never seen nor felt
Because it's never been his
He drowns in a pain he's never known
Of a woman he cannot love
For it's a mortal touch
That cannot taint their souls.

September '99





Beautiful nights...
Dark blue skies and irreplacable memories.
Kissing in the rain...
Deep looks and long stares.
Car rides and night...
And when I stare up at the sky...
My soul cries.
Watching stars without you...
And my soul cries. 




And he stares at me from across the room
His eyes tell me a faint rememberance of
What was once
How it feels to be once again
Reunited with, now, this stranger
My lover
And when his gaze fades
I have expected it to
But for a moment in time
We were as one again
And still I long for his touch 
But it melts into a state of remission
For being subject to emotions in this essence
Is suicide for a lost lovers heart
Time passes still
And in the back of my world 
I ache for his presence 

(4/23/99)



I don’t know why I didn’t notice earlier,
I don’t know why we always fought, 
I don’t know what made you decide-

And I don’t know how you could just walk away so easily, but I don’t know how I eventually did either.
I don’t know if you ever cared,
And I don’t know if you ever loved me,
	and I don’t think I ever will.

I don’t know if I can ever look back on the nights,
	and not miss them.
I don’t know if I could ever hear one of out many songs
	and not have a tear in my eye.

I don’t think I can ever gaze up at the starry sky,
	and not remember.
I don’t know if I can ever hold another lover,
And I don’t know if I can ever give my heart and soul,
	as entirely as I gave it to you.

At first I didn’t know if I could get on with my life,
	but I realized that I already was.
I didn’t think I could ever kiss another,
	but I remembered I already had.

I don’t know if I’ll ever fall in love again.
And I don’t know that if I do,
	if it’d ever mean as much.
I don’t know that for the rest of my life,
	I’ll ever feel that way again.

I don’t know if I’m sorry it ended.
And I don’t know if I’ll ever get over you.
I don’t know if on my wedding night, 
	I’ll look back and remember you, like you wanted…

I don’t know why it hurt so bad.
I don’t know if I’ll ever be so hurt again.
And I don’t know if I’ll ever not remember you,
	but I  hope, I pray I never forget.
	









Untitled
Looking back,
You were always there.
Never necessicarily when I needed you,
But you were there,
And I needed you,
And I need you now,
Times have changed, but
I have not.
Life goes on but I need you still.
I tried my hardest,
I held you when you cried,
You held me,
So many times.
Only you.
Because I needed you,
And I need you now.
-Lynsey


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