“If they didn’t want me yelling at them then they should have stayed in Rock Creek and out of my business!” Lou spat. “The same goes for you and Jimmy too! The sooner you get it through that thick skull of yours, that I don’t have to explain anything to you Kid, the better off we’re all going to be!”
“I’m thick headed? You’re the one who’s too mule stubborn to accept help when it’s being offered!” Kid said incredulously.
“If I was in need of someone’s help, I would have asked for it! But I don’t need anybody’s help and if I did, I sure and the hell wouldn’t ask you!” Lou said through gritted teeth. “I don’t need or want anything from you Kid! Not now, not ever! I’d rather die first than to ever be beholden to you for anything again!”
Kid was both stunned and hurt by Lou’s hatefully spoken words. He knew things were bad between him and Lou…and most of it was his fault…but he hadn’t thought they were so bad as they couldn’t work them out…that their love for each other would help them ease the pain of their separation and angry words had caused and heal their hearts enough to bring them back together again. Now for the first time he was realizing that things might never be right between them again.
“You don’t mean that Lou. You’re just saying it to pay me back for all the hurtful things I’ve done to you over the past couple of months. I admit that I’ve been a jerk. That you have every right to be this angry at me…but nothing you say is going to change the fact that I do care about you, that I still love you whether you believe it or not.” He told her.
“You’re right Kid, I don’t believe it! I’d be a fool to believe anything you ever say again! We’re through! I don’t want to have anything to do with you! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got things to do and someplace better to be than staying here all night arguing with you!” Lou said, brushing Kid aside and walking over to Lightning who stood a few feet away.
Jimmy moved to block her path. “Running away isn’t going to solve anything Lou. You taught me that. You said that as long as a man or a woman has friends’…family, then they don’t ever have to do be alone again. That together they could solve any problems, mend wounded feelings and broken hearts and strengthen bonds. Do you really believe that or was it just something to say?”
New tears sprang into Lou’s eyes at Jimmy’s words. She hadn’t thought her dry and aching eyes had enough moisture left to summon of any more tears, but apparently she was wrong. They blurred her vision so that where once she was only seeing one Jimmy, she was seeing two now. Sobs of frustration and anger and hurt and pain rose up inside of her and spilled out of her mouth as she stared at the two Jimmy’s. “I once believed in them Jimmy, but I don’t anymore! I thought that once I found all of you, that I would never have to worry again about anyone hurting me! Boy was I wrong! Sometimes it’s your family members that hurt you more than anyone else could! I should have remembered that from what my pa did to me, and my ma, Jeremiah and Theresa, but I didn’t!”
Jimmy and Kid exchanged worried looks. Never had they seen Lou so upset before. They were both trying to think up something to say to her that was comforting, yet not threatening. Clearly there was something more going on with Lou than what she was letting on and if they were careful, they might be able to get her to reveal whatever it was.
“We are your family Lou. I, Jimmy and I would do anything for you. You got to know that? Tell us what’s wrong?” Kid pleaded, his tone gentle.
“What’s wrong? What’s wrong?” Lou’s voice was strained to the point of being hysterical as she replied. “What’s wrong? You have the bloody nerve to stand there and ask me what’s wrong after what you’ve done? What you’ve both done? It would take me from now to next year to list everything you’ve done and I don’t have that much time to waste! So I’ll tell you the first one that comes to mind! How about making a bet for my affections in the barn, as if I was nothing but some whore you both wanted to bed! Does that ring a bell at all?”
The color faded from both the men’s faces at Lou’s words. Neither of them had even stopped to consider the thought that Lou might have found out about the stupid bet they had made in the barn the other day. The only other person who had been in the barn that they knew of was Rachel, but something told them that Rachel wouldn’t have said anything to Lou. She hadn’t wanted Lou to be hurt anymore than what she already was.
Without another word, Lou pushed Jimmy out of the way and went over to Lightning. She placed her boot into the stirrup and prepared to swing herself up into the saddle, but a sharp pain swept through her stomach, making her draw her breath in sharply and lean against Lightning’s side.
“Lou, don’t go like this-” Kid started.
While Jimmy began, “Lou I’m so-”
“Save it! I don’t want to hear any lame apologies from either of you! Just leave me alone!” Lou shouted against Lightning’s side. She moved as if to mount Lightning, but before she could she felt a hand upon her shoulder drawing her away from the stirrups and against a warm chest.
“Lou, you can’t go like this! You have to give me a chance to apologize, to tell you how wrong I was to treat you so poorly!” Kid told her pleadingly.
Lou felt her heart constrict at being caught up and held in Kid’s strong arms. How her body had ached at night to feel his arms around her, to feel his light caresses and feel his body against hers. How she had longed to breathe in that manly scent that was all Kid and know that she was safe and loved. With more resolve than she thought possible, Lou resisted the urge to melt against Kid and forgive him everything he done wrong, instead pushing herself roughly out of his arms and turning to face away from him. Her mind swam from her violent movement and she felt herself stumble slightly before she steadied herself. Desperation filled her as she realized that they were never going to let her leave alone unless she forced them to do so. Her hand was on her gun before she had time to think about what she was doing. She spun around to face Kid and Jimmy, aiming her gun at Kid’s chest as she did.
“I’m done talking boys! I am leaving here, even if I have to shoot you to do it!"
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