The Sink Was Full Of Fishes

He was happy to leave out for holidays: Canary Islands' sun, the palms, tropical flowers' scent along coconut milk's fragrancies; he was resoluted to clarify everything out with Kass.
He was determined to stop the pretence, and to blow subterfuges away.
Then if Kass would have stubbornely kept her word and intention to mantain their sham on stage for a while more, he wouldn't have got to fake to love her anymore anyway.
He was keen at her.
He was definitely liking her.
But he wasn't in love with her and he would have never got to cross that stage.He had done it already, there was someone else into his heart he would have done and made everything for.
Someone else he was loving more than himself.
Maybe that totalizing feeling had taken his young spirit too soon, too soon banning his will to play and have funny experiences out from his wild twenties...
Too soon he had fallen in serious love, to taste the ephemeral pleasure of useless sex games, too soon he had to go blind to timed tenderness and kinky approaches, and unsensitive to intellectual traps made by expert vamps.
23 years of rushing hormones stopped before the flood would have taken him up into maturity?
Well, Maybe not till that dead point.
Jill never did feel ready to renounce to have "stories". Not until his only love would have been back at his side with assurances she weren't going to trash his life again.
Kass was there to keep training him into winding roads of adult games.
But Jill was too sincere to simply use people.He was so sincere he wanted to give certainty to his sexual toys they were actually merely that.He would have felt everytime some regret for their immature weaknesses towards his possessive egocentrism, and real pain for their condition of inferiority, but his sign of respect would have been just to speak clear with them about the lack of chances their situation would have climbed up into his book of projects.
Just a new edonistic oasis.
All the possible screams and fights he would have faced from Kass after this confession wouldn't have caused any bleed more into him.Those sad shows she was star in acting had no impacts.
Kass had just to quit him.He would have loved that for real.But he knew she hadn't the force to.Some time before, he used to feel sorry for Kass, for the situation he was feeling the maker of.But the glimpse of understanding didn't last enough to her histerical antics.
To reckon she was too weak to love herself enough brought Jill to dismiss her fully. And he started to test her merely sexually.
Kass could taste her own degrade, but she never took the only conclusion after it, and she blindly kept to swallow her own pride under the tiny screams af reiterated orgasms.
Once Jill told her that to get real love one's got to firstly really love himself. Naturally she left his words fade away like untouching ghosts over too wet surface. She kept to content herself with a love existing just in one of her fantasies.
She changed Jill's friendly and true care and affection in gestures of pre-loving attitude, hoping that one day they'd have been blossoming to match her dream.
She could appreciate his sharing of her interests, she could decode his wish to protect her soul.She just adored his way to cuddle her in tender nights they were anyway having for themselves.
But she couldn't name that just to have a bed best friend. Obstinately she wanted to call that reciprocal love.
And Jill, not cruel enough to gift Kass with his body just, never went fair enough to deny it to her, either.