The Phsycic

The setting is school. It shows the class

Mr. Garrison- Now who wants to tell their report to the class first?

Stan- What report?

Mr. Garrison starts laughing

Mr Garrison- You Fu**ing dumbasses!!!! April Fools!!!

Kyle- It's September Mr. Garrison

Mr. Garrison- Not anymore!!! I've taken over the world and changed it to April!!!! You will all feel my wrath!!!!!

Mr. Hat's head starts spinning and the classroom becomes hell. All the kid's start screaming.

Kyle wakes up from a dream screaming

Klye- Dude! that sucked!

The setting is at lunch. the 4 boys are in line for food.

Kyle- And then everything looked like hell and it was all weird.

Cartman- That's just a normal dumb-ass dream from a jew

Kyle- That's just a normal fat-ass insult from a fat piece of s**t!

Cartman- Hey! I'm not fat, you're just dramaticly skinny!

Stan- You don't even know what dramatic means!

They walk up to get their food

Chef- Good morning children

Everyone- Hey Chef

Chef- How are my little crackers today

Kyle- I'm not too sure

Chef- So you're confused?

Kyle- Yeah

Chef- Well, let me sing you a little song. it might clear things up.

Music starts

Sometimes people just don't know

will it be sunny, or a little bit of snow

It might be different or just the same

But no matter what I can lay ya down

We could get out of our uncomfy clothes

and forget all about our loathes

we'll get in bed and get all HOT!!!

and i'll lick your body all over alot!

And I'll ki.....

Music stops

Chef- I mean what seems to be the problem children?

Stan- Kyle had a real weird dream last night

Kyle- Yeah, and I think it meant something too. Like the end of the world or something.

Chef- Well Kyle, you have nothing to worry about now. It's salsbury steak day!

Cartman- Kick ass!!!

The next scene is in the classroom

Mr. Garrison: Now who wants to share their report to the class first?

Stan- What report?

Kyle (whispering to himself)- Oh s**t! it's happening again!!

Mr. Garrison- Ha Ha! You fu**in dumbasses!!!!!! April fools!!!!!!

Kyle- bb bb bbut it's September Mr. Garrison

Mr. Garrison- Not anymore!!! I've taken over the world and changed it to April!!!! You will all feel my wrath!!!!!

Mr. Hat's head starts spinning and the classroom becomes hell. All the kid's start screaming.

Mr. Garrison- Ha! Ha! September fools! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!! you guys can stop now!

Mr. Garrison is still laughing when about 30 guys come out of the ceiling and secret passages in the wall. They start carrying equipment out of the classroom. The kids eyes are wide open and some of the desks are on the ground with the kids still in them.

Mr. Garrison- Class dismissed

The whole class leaves and Mr. Garrison is still in the classroom by his desk

Mr. Garrison- Now where the hell did I put the real Mr. Hat?

It shows the boys getting off of the bus and they start building a snowman.

Kyle- Did you guys notice anything....weird about Mr. Garrison today?

Kenny- Yeh, the f**kin idiot spent about $10,000 just trying to scare the s**t out of us

Kyle- Yeh, but that's what he did in my dream, everything was the same

Kenny- But you never said anything about a bunch of people coming out of no where

Stan- Yeh, but Kyle is right, everything but that happened.

The scene ends and shows Kyle struggling in his sleep. It starts showing his dream. The four boys are at starks pond.

Cartman- Hey you guys, we should go now. I'm gettin hungry.

Stan- You're always hungry fat ass!

Cartman- shut up hippie!

All of a sudden, a giant frog comes out of a bush.

All but Kenny- AUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kenny- Maybe if we kiss it it'll turn into a prince.

All laugh

The head comes off of the frog and it reveals Mr. Garrison

Mr. Garrison- If you little bastards even TOUCH me i'll kick your asses to college. Now what the f**k did you do with Mr. Hat?

Kenny- I saw him masturbating and looking at a picture of you.

Mr. Garrison- Really?

pause for about 2 seconds and Kenny starts laughing

Mr. Garrison- You go to hell! you go to hell and you die!

Kyle wakes up

Kyle- What the hell was that?

The next scene shows them at the bus stop, talking about Kyle's second dream

Stan- So it was just a frog the whole time? What the hell is up with a giant frog that talks about Mr. Hat?

Kyle- Didn't I tell you?

Stan- Tell us what?

Kyle- It was Mr. Garrison.

Everyone- ooh!!!!

Kenny- Did we kiss Mr. Garrison?

Everyone- Eww!!!!!

Kenny- And was Mr. Hat really masturbating?

Cartman- Kenny, you dumbass! Why the hell would he be fishing?

After about 5 seconds they all start laughing. the school bus comes to pick them up.

Ms. Crabtree- Sit down! we're running late!

Stan- Why the hell should we listen to you, you fat ugly bitch?

Ms. Crabtree- What did you say?

Stan- I said i wish i had a shell for this fat ugly itch.

Ms. Crabtree- Oh.

The boys enter the bus and the bus leaves.

It shows them in school. Mr. Garrison is still missing Mr. Hat and has Mr. Twig.

Mr. Garrison- Well children, today is a very special day. One of you cock-sucking little bastards stole Mr. Hat and I had to take our summer friend Mr. Twig out from an oak tree. And Mr. Twig is pissed off and he will be as long as_

Kenny- We get the f**kin point god damn it! You're too f**kin dumb to remember what the f**k you did with Mr. hat and as long as Mr. hat's gone our lives are gonna be made a living hell.

Mr. Garrison- that too. oh hell, class dismissed

Stan- but it's only 10:05.

Mr. Garrison- That's it! detention for everyone!

Everyone- Aww!

It shows detention. Mr. Maki is at a table and Mr. Garrison is pacing with a cigarette in his mouth. It shows the boy's table

Cartman- Well, it's another fine mess you got us into

Stan- it wasn't my fault. it was Mr. Garrison's for losing Mr. Hat.

Kyle- Well i think i know what happened to Mr. Hat. you guys meet me at Starks Pond at 5:00 and I'll explain.

it shows Mr. Garrison and he's right behind them

Mr. Maki- Detention dismissed, mkay

everyone- Yeah!

Everone but Mr. Garrison leaves

Mr. Garrison- 5:00 at Stark's Pond.

It shows the Stark's Pond sign and does a close up to the boys

Cartman- So, what the hell happened to Mr. Hat?

Kyle- Guys, now remember how...

Cartman- Hey you guys, we should go now. I'm gettin hungry.

Stan- You're always hungry fat ass!

Cartman- shut up hippie!

All of a sudden, a giant frog comes out of a bush.

All but Kenny- AUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kenny- Maybe if we kiss it it'll turn into a prince.

All but Kyle laugh

Kyle- my dream!!!!!!

The head comes off of the frog and it reveals Mr. Garrison

Mr. Garrison- If you little bastards even TOUCH me i'll kick your asses to college. Now what the f**k did you do with Mr. Hat?

Kyle- We didn_

Kenny- I saw him masturbating and looking at a picture of you.

Mr. Garrison- Really?

pause for about 2 seconds and Kenny starts laughing

Mr. Garrison- You go to hell! you go to hell and you die!

Kenny- No, YOU go to hell and YOU die.

Mr. Garrison- You first!

He pulls out a gun (the same one from Kathie Lee Gifford) and shoots Kennyabout 80 times.

Stan- Oh my God! They killed Kenny!

Kyle- You bastards!

Mr. Garrison- Now do you little bastards want to tell me where Mr. Hat is!

Kyle- Check your f**kin pocket!!!!!!!

Mr. Garrison checks his pocket and pulls Mr. Hat out. He starts laughing a little

Mr. Garrison- Well would you look at that! That sure was silly of me! Have a good day kids.

Rats come and eat Kenny

Stan- Wait...Why did you have to drag us to Starks Pond for that?

Kyle gets shot numerous times from behind

Stan- Oh my God! They killed Kyle!

Cartman- Heh, Heh. That's what the jew deserved!

Stan punches him

Cartman- Ow!

When the dead Kyle falls you see another Kyle with a gun

Stan- Dude, this is pretty f**ked up right here.

Kyle- It's really me, you guys. That was some alien Cyborg from Venus.

Stan and Cartman- Oh.

The episode ends.