Semi-Useful and Totally Unique Quotes From Yours Truely...

  • Nobody can be as imperfect as I would like them to be.
  • Those who can... don't like those who box.
  • I came, I saw, I painted it green.
  • The more sucessful you are, the more people want you to screw up.
  • No matter how hard you try you will never have it better than your cat.
  • Goats will only eat the things you want them to stay away from.
  • Sex: America's favorite pastime.
  • Got milk? That's good, I wasn't going to share anyway.
  • Spam: The other non-meat.
  • I don't really like the way you think, but I'm glad that you do.
  • Peanut Butter. It works on soooooo many levels.
  • Small minds think alike, great minds think different.

    Things you shouldn't touch:

    My Favorite Soft Things