You May Be a Roswell Fan If...

You have no interest in a cute guy from school until he heals you with a touch and tells you he’s an alien and suddenly you fall in love with him.

You go out and buy Dido’s album No Angel because Roswell’s theme song “Here With Me” is on it.

You start watching Dawson’s Creek to try and see the episodes Jason Behr guest starred in.

You start watching Xena: Warrior Princess to try and see the episodes Shiri Appleby guest starred in.

You rent any movie because a Roswell star played in it (or in the case of Disturbing Behavior: 2 Roswell stars, one Roswell executive producer).

You get into a fight with anyone about Jason Behr being the cutest guy on earth.

You argue with a friend over who is cuter Jason Behr or Brendan Fehr.

You refuse to talk to anyone who thinks Katherine Heigl is even slightly overweight.

You cried when Roswell Online was hacked into and destroyed.

You are more paranoid than most whenever you see the sheriff.

You lose your diary and suddenly you begin accusing everyone of stealing it to learn about your alien friend.

You search the Internet for anything Roswell related.

You think of Liz and Max’s hug every time you hear “I Love You” by Sarah McLachlan.

You wish you were an alien so you could clean your clothes by waving your hand instead of doing the laundry.

You get a headache and wish you had a secret power to make it go away.

Your mom (or dad, or best friend) gets an injury and you offer to heal it for them, as long as they don’t turn you over to the government.

You’re terrified of talking to the new school counselor.

Any time you see a hand print you wonder if Max, Michael, or Isabel are around.

You try to heat up coffee by using your hands.

You try to listen to a CD by holding it up to your ear.

You refuse to date anyone named Kyle.

You shake the vending machine and hope that everything falls.

You suddenly develop a craving for Tabasco Sauce.

People keep giving you UFO related books to read.

You try to find a copy of Among Us by James Atherton.

You look up Marathon, TX, on a map to see if it really exists.

You get caught speeding and tell the officer that you have a weak bladder and had to pee to avoid getting arrested.

You write/read Roswell fan fiction.

You try and figure out why Max would tell Liz he is an alien, but not tell her why they were all going to Texas in “285 South”.

You think of Max, Michael, and Isabel every time someone says the words “alien” or “secret”.

You wish you could go into other people’s dreams and play jokes on them.

You dream about the show or its characters.

You used to hate Monday’s but now it’s your favorite day of the week.

You suddenly decide vanilla ice cream is your favorite.

You tell your non-Roswell watching friends they are weird for not watching and loving the show as much as you do.

You insist on telling everyone Roswell is the next X-Files.

You get a haircut like your favorite Roswell character.

You wish you could wave your hand over your enemy’s test and change all the answers to the wrong ones.

You wish you could read Faulkner’s The Hamlet as fast as Isabel read Among Us.

You read James Joyce’s Ulysses to see if “what incensed them the most was the blatant jokes of the ones that passed it all of as a jest, pretending to understand everything and in reality not knowing their own minds” is really on page 655.

You start watching Win Ben Stein’s Money.

You start laughing anytime someone mentions The View.

You start dressing like your favorite character from the show.

You are convinced that there are aliens disguised as humans everywhere.

You start telling people that aliens are not bad.

You vow never to watch Independence Day, Alien, or Men In Black, again because they are discriminating against aliens, even though you loved these movies before watching Roswell.

You being taking art classes in order to start drawing Michael’s dome.

You suddenly decide you’d like to be a waitress.

You start carrying your house key in the top of your thermos.

You decide the chain lock on your front door is not good enough.

You have every episode taped.

You wonder when all the Roswell merchandise will hit stores.

You were one of the first people to log on to the Internet to search for or build Roswell pages.

You can name every Roswell episode of the top of your head.

You drive your friends crazy by telling them about each episode in detail.

You are afraid that Kate Foster from First Wave will discover Max’s secret.

You try to find a necklace with the symbol from “River Dog” on it.

You think you can start skipping classes and not get into trouble.

You don’t question where everyone’s parents are when they’re going on out of state road trips and breaking into hotel rooms.

You begin wondering about the level of security at your local hospital.

Any episode has ever made you cry, or laugh so hard you cried.

Instead of counting the days until your birthday, you count the days until the next new episode of Roswell airs.

People start talking about government conspiracies and aliens whenever they see you.

You don’t have a home page, just a Roswell page.

You name any of your children after Roswell characters.

You know every line of every episode, and play the episodes for you friends just to demonstrate your wonderful memory.

People refer to you as, “The guy/girl who watches Roswell”.

You look up the characters’ names in the phone book, and get excited if you find one.

You go to a rave with the hopes of being arrested like Liz and Alex in “Heat Wave”.

You start out ever journal entry by stating your first and last name.

You decide to participate in a Sweat Lodge Ceremony just to see what happens.

You kiss someone you like and use the excuse that it was to calm them down.

You buy more than one tape or CD because one of the songs was played in a Roswell episode.

You buy every magazine that mentions Roswell in it.

You stare up at the night sky, searching for the V-Shaped constellation.

You sit around making up a list of how to know if you’re a Roswell fan.