Prologue...
Gazing at the crowd in front of me, scattering my mind into another place, I tried my best to concentrate. My gaze had kept on slipping and I often left my brain in another dimension.
Can I help you, I yelped, dazedly, twirling my arm in a slow motion, saying I’m open. Though at the time I was squinting. Well whatever the case, I guess he must’ve believed I could actually help him.
“yeah I’d like 3 super size cokes, 2 super size sprites,” he droned on and on. After the first thing he said I blanked out. “Uh huh…” I nodded, murmering
When there was a sudden commotion to the left of the store, with a bunch more people coming in to eat, I was really going insane. The crowd was overwhelming. I felt a little faint, and helpless. Everyone seemed to be yelling and I was way incredibly lost, as what to do. I tried to wake my mind up, by stretching my eyes wide open. After a few minutes of all sorts of screaming kids and drooling guys checking out the girls who dressed really revealing. It was sick. My insides were going to explode.
I wondered for a moment if I would ever be free. If I would be able to do something And enjoy it. My conscious mind was so telling me negative thoughts. ‘I should just leave the world. You could disappear for awhile.
I tore a knife inside my stomach, blanching out on the floor, covered with real sickness now. I felt sharp pains in me. I can’t believe I am this crazy. Judging by the shortness of breath I was experiencing, I was slowly dying.
Meanwhile, the three guys had noticed that I was in a strange position- one of them leapt over the counter and after he saw me struggle for something, he shouted madly to his brothers, “someone call an ambulance”
However, after a few minutes, I had noticed I was like flying over the earth. My soul felt more at ease. I flew around for a few minutes. My hair had seemed to be really shiny, and I think I was a mist. I waundered back to where the guys were and sought out my body I could take over for a little while.
I think to him I am just him; he doesn’t quite yet realize I am in his body
Entering with light easy steps I landed by his side, gazing awestruck on how at ease he was, with his own kind. It blew me away. I took a chance, and blew some cold air towards him; somehow I had managed to make him look up. When he did, his eyes bugged out. Yet, he was speechless. I think because I had looked pretty dead to him on the cold floor. I’m not though. I am just free.
I told him bluntly, “I am joining you,” and I slid into his soul, with ease. I relished the thought of being an in control guy for a change. It was sweet. Totally Different from being Female. Ick.
Well, I guess we had moved on out of there. We went to another place, far nicer, and sat down outside. Their dog, Winston, had followed us too, from the truck. It lapped up ontop of me, licking me like crazy. Like I was someone new. The guy was like, what are you nuts?
Gosh… is there any way to get rid of ghosts? Like for instance the one that is in me? She is so annoying. She keeps on asking if she can eat something when I am not even with that type of food. I mean, really. Come on… Can’t she bug someone else?
She gazes at me all the time. She is obviously a fan; or should I say was. She has that air about her. Like she was crazy or something. Geez. What’s a guy to do? Please ask her not to tell me something I really don’t want to know…” contradicting himself with, “no, that’s not a good idea… she’d go belistic.”
All she ever does is ask questions… all about things I have no idea how they were created or whatnot about odd things. Itz insane, really. She is a nice person and all, but she really tries to hard to try to be intelligent.
My brothers have been noticing a change in me, too. They’ve been trying to figure out what’s up. I think they might think I have a girlfriend or something. They watch me all of the time, trying to pinpoint what my actions consist of, and why is it when I eat, I slurp more. Plus, I have a tendency to play with my hair. It must look kind of odd to them. Picking through hair? a guy habit? I don’t think so. Everytime I get nerved now, I grip my pen or pencil in my teeth. Zac & Isaac saw me once doing that, and questioned each other with their eyes, ‘geez, what is wrong with him.’
My thoughts though, weren’t always with her. I could tell when I saw her reflection. She was like a mistic ghost, searching for something. Mine, on the other hand are more focused, more alert and more willing to transform.
I do have to admit, though, she has a passion for finding out answers by asking questions. She is always asking why this and why that? It is amazing watching her in wonderment. She often seems to go into her own little world. As though she is listening to something someone once said to her or trying to remember the past. Or something. Like she is her own, and I am my own. Two separate cells, individually wrapped within trying to find ourselves. She was longing for something; I could see. I haven’t got the slightest clue as to what yet. Maybe later on I’ll have to ask.
Well, I left that thought as I realized I was getting thirsty. ‘Water.’ I thought. She seemed satisfied by my choice. She made an mmm good noise as I gulped some down. I stared at nothing for a moment, going into a kind of state like the ghost in me. I had to wonder what it was like to see things in a different view than my own. What could have made her feel so alone, and untouchable. From what could have made her want out so badly? And then go into my body. It’s an odd sensation. Definetly. I mean, who’d think she would choose me, of all people? I’m not at all like my brothers; witty and comical. I’m more shy and quiet and keep to myself mostly. I’m like a slug sometimes; slow at understanding or getting something. Plus I am way too much of a perfectionist. I puncture everything. If it doesn’t sound good enough for me, I push again to be more amazing.
After that, I just let my soul drift. As though, she choosing me, was meant to be; Perhaps I was to help her discover what she once had in her. The waters from the sky dripping my life with a drenching shower of sadness as I saw in an instant what had…
With that last thought, I then turned the faucet on once more and I drank. It was cold and crisp. I looked outside toward the garden area, jumped up from where I was. The weather outside seemed to be nice. I decided to travel out, taking my dog with me. She hadn’t gone out for like forever. I walked to the white picket fence, seeping through the gates with my hand, unlatching it. Winston, my little pug came bounding with me. She was adorable.
We walked down to the park for awhile, and then Lila spoke once again, only this time, she commented “Thanks for letting me stay.”
He paused also, debating whether to respond or not. I guess the genuine voice gave his vocal chords some work for he said, "your welcome." He gazed eastwards towards the sun, and murmered softly, “ I still wish you were here as a person; not in me. It’s an odd feeling- having to share a body with a spirit.”
I (Lily) was content- just laying there, feeling the breeze brush across me, reveling in the lush green grass and the smells of spring all around me. It was sweet. I cozied up with my adorable pug Winston and then grabbed a pen and paper out of my backpack. I sat against a tree trunk propped up to write and think. Life is instantly trying to fly by isn’t it, I thoiught, to myself, as I realized that I could talk how much I wanted to; for I wasn’t really disturbing Taylor- he seemed to have his own mind. I only attempt when I can see he is in need of a friend. I drift now, my eyes slowly shutting out the light outdoors into a little rolling snooze. My head grazed the back of the tree, slightly. My head felt a jolt of heat being thrown at me. I was then aware that Taylor’s brothers were calling him and were blow drying their hair outside. I love the sun's glare for it warms my soul.
“Hey Taylor, you ever wonder if there’s life beyond life?” I pondered to him, creasing my everpresent curiosity to him once again. Like I mean, is there such thing as afterlife? A place we all go? Do we get to be matter or an atom? Or perhaps something like a beautiful lily or tree? I was just wondering if we actually transform or mesh with the world around us. It seems physically impossible to exist. It’s like we are souls but without energy we’d be lost. That makes me wonder- what is energy- how do we get it? ”
He gazed towards me with an exhaustive smile, tending to his hair, looking kind of savy, responding, after a minute, “ yeah I suppose there is life after life; of course that’s because you’re in me. Of course there most likely is an afterlife- where most go, I don’t know. Neither do I know what you are. Life is short. Once it’s gone it’s gone. Yet you still live on in others. But I don’t know about people who don’t find bodies to live in… They might go into an animal, or whatever suits their personality. I’m not sure.“ He paused, then said softly, “Well, if you don’t mind, I’d like to concentrate on my music now.” He turned slowly, tiredly back to his writing spot, and I just watched, trying to learn how to write music and songs.
When I was alive I didn’t know much of how to write songs. I only knew of poetry. 'Within the scrapings of a window, my soul ached to be loved; with wandering eyes scoping out the clouds of walls, perceiving the most enchanted times were of a dreamers life'. I've tried songs; They didn’t work. He was writing as though he was meant to.
His hand motions were fluent and graceful. They had a poetic feel to them. I drifted back to Taylor’s body, reaching into his soul. I read what he wrote.‘Wow. What an amazing writer you are there.’ I spoke to him.
After the hours of the sun passed us, our moods were uplifted by the times of night, where everything seemed right. Our love was bulletproof to the existence of dark realms. We ceased to begin our barren lives with positive flowing thoughts.
"but wait, Taylor. how come the stars can't talk to us?" "Why can we gaze up there with questions of intelligence, but they can't respond back?
"That's an odd question," he stated, staring at her in a different light. "But if you must ask, you must let me ponder..." he tilted his head, looked at the starry sky, saw burst of lights spark up the valley, and breathed, "I dont think that we were meant to talk to the stars until it is our time to go live within the heavens. If we were to know everything that we wanted to know, then we really deeply would not learn as much as we do. Life Would be too Easy for everyone to escape. No one would want to suffer, they would just ask the elders or stars what should they do." "Now, Does that answer your question," he commented with a sparkle in his eys.
I was happy to be obliged, so I chirped, " Yeah, for now...""but I still need to figure some things out. "
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