1. Who does what?

Bill F. - guitar, yelling and attempts at singing

Damon P. - bass and singing

Steve M. - drums and singing

2. How did your band form?

B: I met Damon through the punks@umich.edu e-mail list and he already knew Steve. Plus his monthly comic book pull list was eerily similar to mine.

D: Yeah, that whole e-mail list hated me and Bill cause we weren't PC enough, so we got together and the trinity was complete. Actually, we started out as a 4-piece. We used to have a different drummer named N8 but he was asked to leave the band due to his drug problems (he needed Ritalin.) Steve and I have been playing together in several Different bands for almost 10 years, so it was tough to find someone new to work with. Bill just clicked, more so than anyone before.

S: I've known Damon since High School. One of our first conversations ended with me trying to stab him with a pair of drumsticks. That's how he found out that I was a drummer. If I had it to do over again, I would have thrown a cymbal at him.

3. How do you go about writing songs?

B: Just kind of write them. I don't know many chords so when I'm messing around with the guitar and I find something new I usually just keep jamming on it until I get a song out of it.

D: Typically one of us brings a rough song with lyrics to the table and we try it. We each sing what we write so we have a pretty good idea about how it goes, then we each put a spin on it and it ends up completely different than it started, or it doesn't work and we drop it. The songs that don't have lyrics typically go to Steve (as he's a drummer and you know what they say...)

S: I write lyrics, a melody line, and sing it. Then Damon plays something that has nothing to do with what I was just singing. Sometimes it works

4. What is your favorite venue?

B: I don't think we've played there yet.

D: No kidding, I think the Ann Arbor scene is really stagnant right now and more about posing than music. It's really irritating. So we're looking at other options out of state.

S: (in response to Damon's comment) Hopefully other cities in other states will not be as lame as Ann Arbor.

5. What is the shittiest venue?

In unison: Half-Ass HALF-ASS HALF-ASS!!!

D: I think we just have really bad luck there, and the crowd only comes to see one of the bands, it's really lame, like the changing of the guards.

S: Yeah, the Half-Ass Sucked!

B: Well, it's always sad to see a space close, even if it is only temporary. But we'll always have our cherished memories. My favorite was when some drunk kid harfed up a steaming broth of meaty goodness all over the place, then Mazinga and the EQMC people had to clean it up.

6. What are your beliefs religiously and/or politically?

B: As a scientist I tend to lean strongly towards Ayn Rand's objectivist ideals, but as a punk I know people are way too fucking stupid to ever really govern themselves efficiently. I guess I'm pretty much a nihilist. Or at least an anarchist.

D: Religiously I don't really give a shit, as far as Christianity goes, it seems like the biggest pricks in the world have WWJD bracelets on. One time I was at the Toledo zoo and there was this kid fishing quarters out of one of the fountains wearing WWJD hat shirt and bracelet, and I asked him, "is that what Jesus would do?" He flipped me off and ran away! I guess I feel that the important part is to be a good person, fuck all that god shit. Politically, I think the current system is fucked but there is no way to change it, its all about individuals and not about people. And that will never work.

S: I think it's pretty fucked up to ask us about god and politics when we're supposed to be talking about music. God does not exist and politics are beyond our control.

7. Band members influences

B: Pretty much all early 1990s Brit-pop and shoegazer stuff, mid 1990s punk (especially stuff released on Gravity, Ebullition, and Vermiform), all kinds of emo/"slow-core"/whatever you want to call bands like Seam, Codeine, Bedhead, etc. I'm frequently accused of being a close-minded musical snob because I almost invariably hate the music that other people really respect, but what can you do?

D: Everything. I started off on metal, moved to "grunge" then to punk, then to Ska, Jazz, old school rap, old school country... Pretty much anything with feeling. Lately I've been listening to Otis Redding so go figure. And I think I incorporate a lot of those different styles into my playing, you just have to listen closely to hear it.

B: (again) Oh, as far as what I incorporate into my playing, really the only thing I can pin down is my complete rip-off of Kevin Shields' "glide guitar" technique every now and then. Other than that I barely know what I'm doing.

S: As far as drumming goes, I'm influenced by all kinds of stuff, but I don't own any of it.

8. Bands you think blow.

B: I'd rather not be too specific, but basically anybody who dresses like a reject from HR Puff'n'Stuff on stage, plays little kids toy instruments, or has glaring faux-ass rockstar pretensions. If it's obvious that the band is more concerned with how they look posing with their instruments, instead of how they sound playing their instruments, then they blow. No question about it.

D: Yeah, I hope this trend ends soon, it reminds me of Glam rock -- same attitude, it's all about how you look, not the music.

S: I like to make friends. I don't know, I guess it just goes with my sunny disposition. I think that everyone who plays music has at least one thing to say worth hearing. Except Cornish in a Turtleneck. Those guys are fucking retards.

9. Future plans

B: Play more shows. Write and record more songs. Maybe learn some more chords.

D: Play Chicago, Toronto, London, Windsor, Dayton, Cleveland, you get the idea. Get someone to release our CD. Write more songs.

S: Play a show for people who want to hear good music instead of playing for people who just want to get laid.

10. Self-aggrandizing statement

B: "We're not as bad as you've heard!"

D: Bill is referring to one of the shows we did at the Halfway Inn where we closed with a freaked out cover of the Beatles' "Day Tripper" which was just a ton of distortion, feedback, and screaming. We thought it was really funny, but no one laughed. That happens a lot. So, anyway, apparently a few people only heard that song and judged us on it. As for my statement: "Music for people who don't take themselves too fucking seriously." If all your albums are from one genre, don't bother listening. If you want to hear something new and different, check it out.

B: (again) Notice he didn't say "good." Just "new and different." And I'm not really so sure we're even different.

S: Were not as bad as you've heard, we're worse. We're talentless, tone deaf hacks, and if you're not careful we'll probably fuck your girlfriend too. Damon's right, no one ever laughs.

B: (again) It's a sad, lonely life.