I need a drop of sanity to save my soul
I don’t often ask for things that way
It’s never really been a major goal
Always bending to and fro
Never knowing where to turn
I’ve lost myself in the shadows of choice
And daylight’s starting to burn
Whoever wanted me to be this way
Sure picked a funny voice in the crowd
I never thought of seeing the message
I’ve always drifted high on my cloud
I see things that aren’t always there
Don’t know if you can see them too
It’s obvious, really, once you stare long enough
Try, and you can see them too
I usually figure things out by myself
I always feel better that way
It’s getting harder to find the edge all alone
And I’m scared of what they will say
I really feel tired most of the time
The caffeine persona is rather a guise
If I don’t do it, then who else will?
There, isn’t that a nice batch of lies?
I think I’m right most of the time,
Really quite charming and deep
Such pretty things I’ve told to myself
That prove themselves wrong in my sleep
I’m anxious and jumpy, moody and strange
I don’t hide it very well at all
They tell me I’ve got to be centered and kind
I try very hard and I just hit the wall
She tells me I’m wrong, I tell me I’m right
Don’t know who to believe anymore
I’m leaning towards her visions of my life
I’ve heard her tell it all before
Got to get busy, got to get moving
Before sand runs through my toes
Don’t think I’m ready, don’t want to leave here
Not ready to change out of these clothes
How can she be better than me?
How am I wrong all the time?
Why are her visions all better than mine?
Who is she to judge how high I should climb?
I feel torn in two between her thoughts and mine
Can never make up my mind
Always fretting, is this the right way?
What am I leaving behind?
Don’t know if you’ll care about it by now
But my little slice of life is quite mad
I hope you’ll understand where I’m coming from
And don’t tell me how I’m being bad
Or mean or vindictive or lazy or cruel
Or stupid and not really thinking
I see exactly what color the light is
A nice shade of yellow that’s blinking