Forever More
Part 1 - Hope
Chapter Five
Rebecca worked on the paintings during the week after Scott left for New York. Upon his return she learned that he had been there working on the recording of his second solo album.
Scott and the other members of Paradox, David, Rick, Kevin and Mike, had all gone their separate ways a few years earlier. All were enjoying varied amounts of success compared to the many years as a multinational headlining band. The break up was mutual, though strained.
Rebecca had been back out to Scott’s a few more times during the following month. During her working visits Scott had joined her in his favorite position next to her on the grass while she painted. He seemed to enjoy their conversations and time together and Rebecca looked forward to them also.
Listening to Scott relate stories of what was going on in his life with the album and everything associated with it Rebecca was fascinated. This whole world was something that she had not one ounce of knowledge about. The world that she lived in consisted mostly of her children and their well being and school. She was also working full time and her own concerns with that along with home were what filled her day. Yet sitting there while he talked she felt more and more compassion for what was important in his life.
Kyle had answered the phone a few evenings earlier and it was Scott calling. He was back home from another trip to New York and asked if Rebecca was available. He was free on the coming Saturday morning and she could come back over if she needed.
Rebecca was back in her spot to the east of the barn. The place was all very quiet that day. Scott had met her once again when she arrived but this time he had someone on the phone and couldn’t walk her out to the coral as was his custom.
A while later he joined her as before. She was just finishing up again for the day. She mentioned that all was unusually quiet. He went on to tell her that Linda had spent the weekend in Chicago after they returned from New York. She would be home sometime the following day. They continued to talk and enjoy the warm summer sun.
Later back at Rebecca’s car she loaded her supplies in and then asked if she might use his bathroom. She followed him through the door that she had entered once before. He showed her to a bathroom off the hallway that connected the kitchen to the garage. As she came out he was in the kitchen offering her a Pepsi. Sure. It sounded really good about then.
They stood in the kitchen a few more minutes and as he could see her glancing about he offered her a tour of the place.
"Its not really as large as it looks," he said as they moved into the dining area and then through to the living room. "Its just that there are so many open spaces that make it look that way."
But the living room was large. There was a grouping of sofas and chairs arranged facing each other. At the far end of the room sat a grand piano with an array of photos atop. Behind them to the back wall in the center was the stairway that led to a balcony the full length of the room.
"Linda really has done a lot with this place. I like nice things but she has a way of pulling it all together. She’s really good at that." He was quite pleased.
They entered a door that led to a hallway that lay directly beneath the upstairs balcony and ran parallel to the living room. It opened on the other end at the far side of the same room. Off this hallway and to the back of the house were, what he told Rebecca, the guest bedrooms. Three of them. She stuck her head in each one. Back out at the other end they started up those stairs. A white wrought iron railing with spiral tines bordered the its length. As they turned onto the upper balcony the view of the pool and beyond into the pasture and wooded area was so beautiful.
Scott first led her to the right and into what he called the office. Besides the computer and all the office equipment that one would expect to find, the room also served as a sort of exercise area and various pieces of equipment sat off to the back near more large open windows.
Back out into the hall he led her in another door. "And this is our room," he said as he moved to the left and let her pass. Again it was bright and airy and open. Very large and she imagined the size of two of the rooms directly beneath. There was even a small grouping of a love seat and over-stuffed chair to the left. She could see that to the right lay the bathroom where light was streaming through, probably from a sky light. The carpet felt so plush that her feet sank as she walked in. There was a pile of clothing that she could tell were his at the end of the unmade bed. Rebecca raised an eyebrow in his direction.
He scowled, "Yeah, those are mine. I wasn’t really expecting anyone up here you know. And besides I am not the clean freak, Linda is."
To the back of the room beyond the king sized bed lay another series of glass doors opening onto a deck. Scott was standing near them now and Rebecca made her way across the room and stood near him. The view was even more spectacular in that direction. Rolling grassy fields to the left and lush woods nearer the house to the right.
"It’s just gorgeous here," she breathed. "Now I know why you love it here so much."
He agreed.
They walked out and down the steps and back into the kitchen. She assumed the tour was over, but he led her up the hallway passed the bathroom that she had used earlier. She could see the garage to their left. He stopped at another door and opened it. Making their way down a small flight of stairs that turned onto a landing Rebecca realized that she was entering his studio.
"Welcome to MY domain," he announced proudly as they entered. She was overwhelmed with the equipment that seemed to be crammed into an otherwise not very large area, or maybe it seemed small because there was so much in there.
Aside from all the electronic equipment, that she could only imagine its use, stood many guitars on stands. There was a sofa shoved off into a corner and a few chairs, more of a folding type scattered here and there and stools. One could tell that this place was used. There were pop and beer cans and ashtrays with contents partially spilled on almost every available ledge. The walls were filled with photos that obviously were very meaningful to him and also awards of many kinds that he had received over the years.
Paradox had four multi-platinum albums and those and accompanying pictures seemed the focal point of the far wall. Her painting was down there too, hung on the wall directly behind what appeared to be, and she later found out to be, the mixing board. This was indeed not only his studio but the heart of his home for him and his life. He walked around the room as a proud parent pointing out pieces of equipment and their uses. He handled the guitars fondly and even played a track for her off the album that he was working on. She could tell that he felt so comfortable here.
Scott and Rebecca found themselves perched on stools just talking. More and more little bits of his life would break off and seem to fall onto her soul as she drank up every word. He spoke of not only outward events that were happing in his life but he let her in on more of an emotional plane. He had definite feelings about a great many things and as they sat longer it seemed clear that they were both trying to make the other aware of their own ideas and concerns. On more than one occasion they finished the same sentence together.
Rebecca found herself clinging to every word, every idea he was voicing. She had needed this type of communication. It was missing from her life. Getting down from the stool he walked over to an apartment sized refrigerator that Rebecca could see was stocked with full contents of all the empty cans that she saw laying about.
"Becky, would you like another Pepsi, or maybe a beer?"
It was the first time that he had called her by that name. It sounded so nice.
"No, Pepsi will be fine." Rebecca answered and smiled.
They walked around more as he answered questions that she had about so many things, never once making her feel like a question was too stupid to even ask. After all this was HIS world and not hers. They settled back onto that well worn sofa and he propped his feet up on a near by chair. The conversation continued.
Rebecca could have gone on like that for hours. Sitting, sharing ideas, and concerns and giving each other insight into the other’s lives. His life style seemed so exciting to her and all the while he loved to share it with her but did not make hers feel any less vital.
That was what she loved about that afternoon. He accepted her for who she was. Her opinions mattered and were weighed right along with his. And she had opinions. More importantly someone cared enough to hear them.
He had kept her laughing with his great wit and he seemed to bring out a side of her that she had long since forgotten even existed. He was quick to laugh and smile and when he did those dimples seemed deeper than ever.
The phone rang in the room and as he got up to answer it he was still laughing hard from something that they had shared. Immediately after saying hello the laugher and the smile left his face. Suddenly Rebecca felt uncomfortable as she noticed his whole voice and attitude changed.
"Yeah, I know. I’m planning to call them tomorrow. Sure. Yeah, whatever. I said I would!" He almost sounded angered at one point. "No, I’m just hanging out with a friend," he said half truthfully and seemingly quite pleased with himself for calling Becky a friend and not having to allude to who that friend was.
Right then Rebecca realized that it was Linda on the phone. They spoke about another minute and she must have asked more specifically who was visiting.
"No, its just Bill. He stopped by to pick up that connector. We’re just having a few beers down here." He turned his eyes in Rebecca’s direction to see if she had heard that. She had.
The conversation ended soon after that and he hung up the phone. Standing there and bit his lip. "Sorry about that. I’m just trying to avoid an argument."
Rebecca could tell that he really felt bad. Not that he had lied but had not been able to tell the truth that she was there in his studio with him.
"Then its true? I got the idea that she didn’t really like me," Rebecca shrugged as she got up from the sofa.
"No, its not that. She just thinks this whole thing was pretty stupid on my part. She doesn’t understand that I wanted a painting of MY horses and My pasture. She’s not a horse kind of person. They are sort of my hobby that she puts up with."
By now the whole feeling of the room had changed for them. Rebecca was suddenly aware of the time where before it mattered not. She had to leave to pick up the boys from her sister-in-law’s. He asked about them, made a laughing comment about not knowing how she handled those two on her own and gave her praise for doing so.
Out by the car Rebecca got in and he pushed the door shut. He stood there as she hooked her seat belt and started the engine. "So what about these paintings? You’re about done, aren’t you?"
She had to admit that she was and a feeling of sadness came over her. Just moments earlier she had felt so connected, so touched by this new friendship they had and now realizing that not only could he not even mention that she was in the room with him but the only reason that kept her coming there was nearly at an end. She drove home with all sorts of mixed emotions going through her head and her heart.
Scott went back into the house and dialed a number. "Bill, it’s Scott. I’m home right now if you want to stop by and pick up that connector. Oh. Well, why don’t I drive out and drop it off tonight. No tomorrow’s no good. I’ll drive out later. No problem."
He hung up and went back into the basement studio and picked up a guitar and picked out a melody that had been playing around in the back of his head for the last few hours. No words, only a melody.
