CajunSue's Joke Page
BOUDREAUX < Mr. Boudreaux was a typical, uneducated Bayou man. De Census man...he come to de Bayou and he's takin' down all dis infomation. He say to Mr. Boudreaux, "Just fill in this part of de form and I'll be on my way." Mr. Boudreaux says, "Well, you'll have to come sit by the side of me and fill it out cause I can't read or write." So de Census man..he sit down by the side of Mr. Boudreaux and he begin askin questions and writin' on de form. Pretty soon he comes to de end of de form and he say to Mr. Boudreaux, "Just sign it down der at de bottom." Boudreaux says, "You already know I don't read or write...I can't sign dat form!" So de Census man, he says, "Just make an X." So Boudreaux, he make a great big X at de bottom and a little, itty bitty one right beside of it. The Census man, he says, "what's wiff dat little bitty x next to de big one? Boudreaux, he says, "I'm a Junior!"
Subject: Boudreaux's Birthday !!!!
On Boudreaux's 80th birthday he turned to his wife Clotille and said: Clotille sher, I done turn 80 year old today and I'm goin' to da docta to get me some uh dat Viagra so we can celebrate. Clotille said: Wait while I get my purse, I'm goin' to da docta wit you. Boudreaux, he said: Mah Clotille, what da hell you need to go to da docta for, sher? Clotille, she say , Well, I gotta get me a tetnus shot. Boudreaux say: A tetnus shot ! What in da hell you need a tetnus shot for sher? Clotille say, Look Boudreaux, If you plannin' to take out dat rusty ole thing and use it on me, I gotta have some protection !
A Guy goes into the store and asks the clerk, "I'd like some Cajun Sausage. The clerk looks at him and says "Are you Cajun?" The guy says "Well, yes I am. If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian??? "Or if I had asked for German sausage, would you ask me if I was German?? Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican?" The clerk says "Well, no." The guys says "WELL, why do you ask me if I'm Cajun just because I ask for Cajun sausage????" "Because you are in a hardware store.
This one is from Jeanine LouviereYOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN LOUISIANA WHEN....... 1. YOU ARE ASKED TO NAME THE FOUR SEASONS AND YOUR REPLY IS "ONIONS, CELERY, BELL PEPPER AND GARLIC". 2. YOU REFER TO LOUISIANA WINTERS AS "GUMBO WEATHER". 3. YOUR WIFE CAN STIR A POT OF GUMBO BY HOLDING THE SPOON WITH HER TOES WHILE SLICING AN ONION WITH HER HANDS. 4. YOU TAKE ONE BITE OF A 5 ALARM CHILI AND REACH FOR THE TABASCO. 5. YOUR MAMA ANNOUNCES EACH MORNING, "WELL, I'VE GOT THE RICE COOKING, WHAT ARE WE HAVING FOR SUPPER?" 6. YOU LET YOUR BLACK COFFEE COOL OFF AND FIND THAT > IT HAS JELLED UP. 7. YOUR FAVORITE BOOK STARTS WITH >>> "FIRST YOU MAKE A ROUX". 8. YOU SIT DOWN TO EAT BOILED CRAWFISH, AND YOUR HOST TELLS YOU "DON'T EAT THE DEAD ONES.....", AND YOU KNOWN WHAT HE MEANS. 9. YOU THINK FOUR DOZENS OYSTERS AND A SIX-PACK CONSTITUTES A TEN-COURSE MEAL. 10. YOUR NAMES ENDS IN "EAUX OR OUX" 11. WHEN YOUR WIFE GIVES YOU AN ANGRY LOOK, YOU DESCRIBE IT AS "SHE PASSED ME A PAIR OF EYES". 12. YOU PLAYED YOUR FIRST GAME OF BOURRE, WHILE SITTING IN A HIGH CHAIR. 13. WATCHING "MUTUAL OF OMAHA'S WILD KINGDOM" MAKES YOU HUNGRY. 14. YOUR FAVORITE TALK SHOW HOST ARE OKRA WINFREY & BRYANT GUMBO. 15. THE FEMALES IN YOUR FAMILY CAN'T DANCE UNTIL THEY TAKE THEIR SHOES OFF. 16. YOU THINK "BAYWATCH" IS AN ENVIRONMENTAL GROUP. 17. YOU THINK BOUDIN, HOG'S HEADCHEESE AND A BUD IS A SNACK. 18. YOU THINK THE FOUR FOOD GROUPS ARE BOILED SEAFOOD, FRIED SEAFOOD, BROILED SEAFOOD AND A BEER. 19. WHEN THE MAN OF THE HOUSE TELLS HIS WIFE "HONEY, GO FETCH MY BOOTS...." AND THEY ARE MADE OF RUBBER!! 20. TO KEEP YOU OUT OF A ROOM YOU DON'T BELONG IN YOUR MAMA TELLS YOU "DON'T GO IN THERE OR THE "TA TAI" WILL GITCHA!!" 21. YOU THINK PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW WHAT "CRAWFISH ETOUFEE" IS COME FROM ANOTHER PLANET!!
Cock Fight
The Louisiana State Police had gotten wind that illegal cock fights were becoming big in the rural areas around Lafayette. They decided to send in Boudreaux, their best undercover detective. Boudreaux spent several weeks in surveillance and came back to headquarters to report.
Boudreaux say, "Dere is tree main group in dis cock fightin' bidness."
"Who are dey?", his sargeant ax.
Boudreaux reply, "De Aggies, De Cajuns, an de Mafia."
"How you know?", axed da sargeant?
"Well," says Boudreaux, "I done seen da cock fight, cher. I knowed da Aggies was involved when a duck was entered in de cock fight."
"What about da others?" question da sargeant. "Well, I knowed da Cajuns was involve wen sumbody bet on da duck. You know dem Cajuns, dey drink too much an say 'Aw, what da hell?', an dey'll do anyting crazy."
"Mais, Boudreaux," axed da sargeant, "How cum you know da Mafia's involve too?"
Boudreaux say, "Da duck won."
Thanks to Debbie and Gary for this one.....
Boudreaux been fish'n down by de bayou all day an he done run outa night
crawlers. He be bout reddy to leave when he seed a snake wit a big frog
in
his mout.
He knowed dat dem big bass fish like frogs so he decided to steal dat
froggie.
Dat snake, hit be a cotton moufed water moccasin so he had to be real
careful
or he'd get bit.
He snuk up behine de snake and grabbed him roun de haid. Dat ole snake
din't
lak dat one bit. He squirmed and wrapped hisself roun Boudreaux's arm
try'n
to get hisself free.
But Boudreaux, him, had a real good grip on his haid, yeh.
Well, Boudreaux pried hit's mout open and got de frog and puts it in his
bait
can. Now, Boudreaux knows dat he cain't let go dat snake or hit's
gonna
bite him good, but he had a plan. He reach into de back pocket of his
bib
overhauls and pulls out a pint a moonshine likker. He pour a couple of
draps
into de snakes mout.
Well, dat snake's eyeballs roll back in hits haid and hits body go limp.
Wit
dat Boudreaux toss's dat snake into de bayou. den he goes back to
fishin.
A while later Boudreaux dun feel sumpin tappin on his barefoot toe. He
slowly look down and dare dat water mocassin was with two frogs in his
mout.
(On Fried Chicken)Boudreaux: "It's terrible what dey doing in du South."
Thibodaux: "What's dat?"
Boudreaux; "Dey burning all of the Churches."
Thibodaux: "Dat's OK, I always like Popeye's better anyhow!!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boudreaux and Thibodaux were driving on the highway, on their way to go
bear hunting They come upon this fork in the road, where there was a
sign
that said, "Bear Left".
So they turned around and went home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boudreaux and Thibodaux were on a weekend hunt when they witnessed a
UFO
landing. As the little green creatures came out of the UFO craft,
Boudreaux
said " Mais whats dat?"
Thibodaux replied as he aimed his gun " I don know me, but Boudreaux,
you
better go back to the camp and put some rice on!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boudreaux and Thibodaux go ice fishing. They stop at a store on the
side
of
the road and ask the cashier where they can go ice fishing.
The cashier says there is a frozen lake across the road and I got bait
and
ice picks to break the ice to fish.
An hour later Boudreaux goes to the store to buy some more ice picks.
He
tells the cashier, "I want all the ice picks you have."
The guy says, "Are you all catching a lot of fish?"
Boudreaux says, "Catching a lot of fish! We don't even got du boat
launch
yet."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boudreaux walks into a bar, and says "Anybody got the number for 911? "
Thibodaux says, "What's the emergency?"
Boudreaux says, "Is that your truck wit du Great Dane in it?"
Thibodaux says, "Yeah why?"
Boudreaux says. "I got some bad news for you podna, my dog done killed
your
dog."
Thibodaux says, "What kind of dog you got?"
Boudreaux says, "A Chihauhau."
Thibodaux says, "Explain to me how your dog can kill my Great Dane?"
Boudreaux says, "He got stuck in his troat."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boudreaux and his brand new wife went to a hotel for their wedding
night.
He went to the front desk and asked for a room. He said it was their
Honeymoon and they wanted a very nice room.
The clerk winked and asked, "Do you want the bridal?"
Boudreaux thought about it a while and then replied. "No, I guess not.
I'll just hold onto her ears until she gets used to it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Cajun Version of The Ten Commandments1. God is number one... and das' All.
2. Don't pray to nuttin' or nobody... jus' God.
3. Don't cuss nobody... 'specially da Good Lord.
4. When it be Sunday... pass yo'self by God's House.
5. Yo mama an' yo daddy dun did it all... lissen to dem.
6. Killin' duck an' fish, das' OK... people - No!
7. God done give you a wife... sleep wit' jus' her.
8. Don't take nobody's boat... or nuttin' else.
9. Don't go wantin' somebody's stuff.
10. Stop lyin'... yo tongue gonna fall out yo mouf!
Why don't you sign my guestbook and tell why you think you are a cajun,or not!
