Road Trip

Road Trip

It was Friday and work at camp was done,
Now it was time to have some fun,
It was time to relax and get away,
But I was suddenly and randomly talked into going on a road trip this day,
Rachel and I set out with Sonja to get her out of a little jam,
So we packed into the Audi like a clam,
We set off to the Soshine, urrr…actually the Sonshine festival, my mistake,
To see some bands by Foot Lake,
We were to set out in an old German car,

The destination was the town of Wilmar,
I noticed that the tire was low,
So we stopped in Owatonna for a little blow,
On the way I played a little game which made me seem nude,
It’s a real fun game but only do it if you are a dude,
You see, I take off my shirt, which could give some people quite a fright,
Then I hold up a sign that says, "I’m naked" and watch people’s reactions with delight,
Time went by and we were getting pretty tired,
So we decided to stop at Wal-Mart to buy a pop and get wired,
Then we saw the most fabulous sign,
The sign read, "World’s largest ball of Twine,"
What a tickle to my spine!
We kept on trudging along,
Hopefully we would make it there before long,
The Dew wasn’t working for me and I think I was just about to snore,
When I was suddenly awoken by a thudding outside the door,
Sonja looked up, fore she thought a helicopter was descending on us from afar,
I said to Sonja, pull over, you have a flat tire on this car,
And sure enough there was a nail in the back left Firestone,
Our fears were confirmed, the tire was blown,
Wilmar was only a half-hour from reach,
But the tire had to get a breach,
That flat tire we had,
Oh boy! Did it make Sonja mad,
Now the Holy Mackerels were a flyin,
She was roaring them out like a lion!
Rachel and Sonja didn’t know how to change a tire and I hadn’t changed one in many years too,
But along came the lone ranger of the country roads, who called himself Andrew,
Andrew and I changed the tire at last,
Actually, we did it quite fast,
All I can say is thank-you for that country boy,
He brought us tremendous joy,
We were finally off on the last leg of the trip,
We were so anxious we were ready to flip,
Then Rachel tried to grab my knees,
And Sonja said that this place smells like worms and cheese,
And finally after a few wrong turns we made it to Sonshine camp,
Which was good because my legs were about to cramp,
On the way up I probably really shouldn’t have fret,
A few times I thought we would crash so I put on my helmet,
But now we were there,
So the helmet came off to reveal my blond hair,
While helmets and barbwire thongs are not recent trends,
At least Sonja got to see her friends,
Well, it was stick third of a niner hockey stick(1:37am) and we were spent,
So it was time to put up my tent,
Though it was tricky to put up the tent this late and tensions suddenly got high,
Luckily there were no elbows thrown into anyone’s eye,
Rachel thought my tent smelled like a bunch of socks in a pile,
While Sonja thought it smelled like the produce aisle,
In the clear cool night rose a pickle flag, And guess what, good old Matt forgot his sleeping bag,
With a wool sweater and two sheets,
I nearly froze off my feets,
I couldn’t sleep because I would shiver so hard that you might of thought that I was having a seizure,
While everybody else could fall asleep at their cozy leisure,
Then Sonja suddenly said something while I was barely awake,
That for a moment it made my blood quake,
She said, "Holy mackerel, We’re in the middle of the road!"
That woke me up and put me in a pissy mode,
Then Rachel turned her head and looked and gave me a look as if to say, What was just said?
I said, "Sonja, go back to bed!"
We were not even three feet from the road made of dirt,
In fact when she said it she wasn’t even alert,
The next day Rachel or Sonja couldn’t remember Sonja’s little sleep talk,
In fact when I told them they seemed to be in shock,
Now it was Saturday and Sonja got to talk and hang out with friends and see her dad,
She seemed very, very glad,
Rachel put my hair in a French braid,
I hope my hair didn’t make too many people afraid,
We saw some good bands including the Poolboys and Burlap to Cashmere,
And a band called Earthsuit, which brought us great fear,
Rachel and I were hot, tired, and cranky so we were ready to flee,
But we would soon be filled with glee,
But not quite yet, a few more things would happen to make the crankiness bloom,
For one, we had very little room,
But that wasn’t what would give my chain a jerk,
Another reason was the speedometer wouldn’t work,
A light on the dashboard that meant the engine was overheating would lurk,
And the car stalled a few times which would not make me smirk,
So I decided to lay down and take a nap,
The next thing I knew we hit a sharp turn and there was a suitcase on my lap,
Now I was suddenly up and awake,
But things were about to change for the better with a quake,
We had just turned onto the town of Darwin,
And we looked at each other with a grin,
I put on that old helmet of mine,
And we gazed in awe at the 11-ton ball of twine,
One man had created this incredible feat,
I was speechless and tried to talk but the only sound that came out sounded like a giraffe bleat,
Man was this Sweet!
The ball of twine rose our spirits to the highest of height,
I swear that we could have taken flight,
We were as giddy as a kid making their 1st S’more,
Now it was time to get a souvenir at the local liquor store,
It was illegal for Rachel and Sonja to go in because they weren’t twenty-one,
They were supposed to be accompanied by a parent or legal guardian,
But the desire for a souvenir still drew them in,
And not the sale on Beefeater Gin,
The old man who worked there looked like he could drink a lot of liquors,
For souvenirs all they had were two shirts, pencils, magnets, and a few bumper stickers,
We all got a souvenir as a little trophy,
And Rachel or Sonja didn’t get taken away by a Smokey,
As we went left the liquor store Sonja accidentally set her car alarm off,
We laughed so hard at Sonja we started to cough,
The stop at Darwin put us in such a great mood,
It would be absurd to think we could ever be rude,
Not too much happened after that on our way down to GEV,
Except we almost hit two herds of raccoons with the Audi,
So here ends the road trip to Wilmar where we went,
But I couldn’t end this with out my own little comment,

It’s hard to say what Rachel and Sonja have done for me,
Going to Sweden had really changed my personality,
Living in such a conservative country kind of put me back into a shell,
But Rachel and Sonja found the potion to break that spell,
Their laughs and smiles would shoot out at my jokes like fountains,
It raised my confidence up to the mountains,
Thinking back now of what I got out of this as the trips ends,
Was the strengthening of a relationship between some great friends,
So here’s my thank-you for those two,
Just keep on doing all that you can do.

By Matthew L. Anderson

Favorite things on the road trip

• 3.) Llamas in heat
• 2.) Holy Mackeral!
• 1.) World's largest ball of Twine!

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Email: cowdance@juno.com