SFGAm, Big Chiefs and The Ride of My Life, Pt. 3

The day before at MA we met RRCer Steven Wilson. He had just come from Big Chiefs the day before and told us he had dropped $180 there in two days. Oh my! Well, in that case we'd better stop at Ho-Chunk casino and maybe we'll get lucky.

Susan got lucky!

Our wrist bands now paid for courtesy of Ho-Chunk, we drove the few miles to Lake Delton and Big Chiefs. Now, I had called Big Chiefs before we left, just to be on the safe side, and I was told they would be open from 10-5 on Labor Day and the wrist bands would be honored during that time. So we figured we would stay there from 1-5:00 before heading home.

We drove through Lake Delton. Wow!!! If I were a little kid I would LOVE this place!!! Every single motel has a *heavily* themed pool area, complete with waterfalls and slides. There are all kinds of tourist attractions on both sides of the road - some look stupid, some look worthwhile. EVERYTHING looks cheesy, but the great thing about excessive cheesiness is that it's usually fun! The bad thing about cheesiness is that it's usually about bringin in the bucks, which Wisconsin Dells excels in. This has to be one of the biggest money pits of any tourist town in America. We stopped at a 200 ft. Rock-o-plane (you just *have* to see this thing!) but they wanted $30 a piece to ride it!!!! Are you kidding me? Hmm, I think I know where some of Steven's money went!

Just a little ways up the road we saw the huge Trojan Horse. It's the centerpiece for their new-for-98 go-kart and it sits at the very top of the park's hill. Now this is very cool, very classic, American kitsch!! We pulled into the parking lot and immediately felt the atmosphere. It's FUN!!! Go-kart tracks and wooden roller-coasters everywhere! The first thing I noticed was the giant logo for Zeus. Then I saw the logo for Cyclops, which is ugly but funny and reminds me of Yukon Cornelius in that old stop-action Christmas special Rudolph the Red- Nosed Raindeer.

I absolutely love this environment. Big Chiefs is situated on a very large piece of land, in a very hilly and wooded area, smack dab in the middle of this two-lane tourist block!! It is SOOOOO COOL I can't even describe it! You get our of your car and you immediately hear the putt-putt of the go-karts, which are everywhere. Big Chiefs must have more go-karts than any other park in America. I had never done a go-kart before so I was really looking forward to it.

This is *kind of* a carnival atmosphere. There are no other rides at Big Chiefs except go-karts and coasters. No shirt shop. Only one building, which houses a concession stand and small arcade. There are two ticket kiosks to purchase wrist bands and tokens.

We walked up to purchase our wrist bands and discovered they had changed the time that the wrist band would be honored. Somebody had scratched out the 10-5 and wrote in the number 3. The park would still remain open until 5 but the wrist bands would only be good until 3:00. After that you had to purchase tokens to continue riding. Tokens are $5 a piece or 5 for $20.

Welcome to Wisconsin Dells.

It was 1:00. Did we want to spend $32 a piece for two hours, then drop another $20, and possibly another, if we wanted to continue riding?

No.

We had the money to spend all right. But it seemed like a very cynical business practice to be open for 7 hours, charge folks $32 for a wristband, then not even honor the thing for the 7 hours. We talked it over and both of us objected to it. We wanted to ride all the rides but we also wanted to feel good about it, and frankly we knew this was a rip-off. So we opted to purchase the 5 tokens for $20 and be happy with that.

With only 5 rides we knew we had to pick and choose carefully. We chose to ride Pegasus first. Pegasus is a junior coaster. It sits closest to the street and has a "quick, ride this thing and get it over with" kind of feeling to it. We decided to ride the backseats only on every coaster. We got in, fastened our restraints, and the first thing the ride op does is come back and push Susan's lap bar down into her stomach. I said "Aww, don't do that!" but he just walked away. The ride itself is very good for a junior coaster. We got airtime in two spots and the right turn-only laterals were *very* strong!! AND we got a reride!!! I had forgotten when Jerry Dorf told me all Big Chiefs coasters have automatic rerides. ALL RIGHT!!!

Pegasus was good. Next up, Zeus. Now I have heard NOTHING but criticism of this coaster. Everyone says its boring. Why do people say roller-coasters are boring? Roller-coasters are NOT boring! I refuse to believe people have developed such low stimulus levels that a roller-coaster of ANY kind could really be boring. I say if you're bored you're boring others so please get away from me.

Zeus is a great ride in the backseat. I love the way it drops right out of the station platform, ala Thunderbolt! Only Zeus' drop finishes with a hard curve to the left which gives it a good head of steam going into the lift. It's not the most intense air-filled out and back I've ever ridden, but we did get some good moments, and its a very fast ride so there were great lateral forces on the turns. The coaster travels completely through the woods which makes for a wonderful ride! And our reride was even better as we barely stopped on the brake run - that immediate drop off the station platform - aaaaaaah!!!!

We only got to ride Zeus once (well, twice with the reride). But I have to say all the negative reports I'd heard about it seemed overly critical. I think maybe people expect more because it's a newer CCI. But just because it isn't an all-out airtime *machine* does not make it the nothing coaster I'd been told it is. Zeus is not Top 10 material, but it's fast, it's fun, it's good some good airtime and lateral forces, it's smooth and very rerideable. I wish I had ridden it more!

Next we decided to ride a go-kart. I have never done this before and really wanted to try it. Besides, after seeing that last drop on Cyclops I was afraid. VERY afraid. I also thought that if we rode Cyclops next I would never set foot in a go-kart, at least not at this park.

We rode the #9 track, Medusa's Madness. We picked it because it had a wooden section that reminded me of a roller-coaster! The karts came off the spiral climb and dropped down onto a rickety boardwalk super slide. Several of the karts were airborne as they came over each dip!

The go-kart was great. The ride op instructed me to take the first kart, so I had an open lane almost the entire ride. With about 5 minutes to go I caught up with and passed the last 5 karts. This made me realize it's probably best to go for the front karts if you can. Susan got assigned a middle of the pack kart and was slowed down by kids who couldn't drive. Go-karts are FUN with a capital F!!! And Big Chiefs has about 18 of them, I think (whatever the actual number, I don't care, don't correct me!).

Lastly we went to Cyclops. Now the day before when I rode Shivering Timbers for the last time I experienced what it was like to be truly SCARED on a coaster. But I was seriously afraid of Cyclops even before we got on it! This coaster has a final drop that...... well, lets put it this way. They have park benches lined up all along the bottom of that drop so people can watch you as you come over and down that drop! And they are ALWAYS laughing!

I don't even remember the other parts of the ride. All I remember is that last drop. It's a doozey, that's all I can say! The track drops very suddenly and far, and halfway down the track curves to the right. I can't even properly describe what an AWESOME AWESOME drop that is!!! It's just an amazing element, one those coaster moments that's unforgettable. Susan got thrown so far out of her seat she grabbed onto my arm, something she *never* does! She was SCARED! She also got an immediate welt on her thigh from being thrown so violently into the lap bar. Still, she gamely agreed to go again, but I noticed she kept her arms down for the second ride!

Cyclops is a true coaster classic.

Our tokens spent, we walked around a bit, vainly searching for a shirt shop. I asked the woman at the ticket kiosk and she said they didn't have any shirts for sale. The employees have *terrific* looking Big Chiefs shirts!! But she said they weren't for sale.

It was now three o'clock, and with no more tokens to use and nothing available to purchase it was time to leave. I *really* wanted to stay and keep riding! I *really* wanted to spend more money there! Big Chiefs has some great things going for it. But their ticket policy is not one of them. When you spend your money you want to feel good about it. You don't want to feel like a sucker. And Big Chiefs played their guests like suckers that day.

So we left Big Chiefs, happy that we made the most of our visit. I'm sure we'll be back, but next time with our buyer beware hats pulled firmly over our heads. If we find we can't get our money's worth there we'll probably just purchase a few tokens and stay for an hour or so. Besides, there's a great place to spend the day just a couple of hours away in Gurnee. I've said it before: Wisconsin Dells is much too much about money.

Mark