This was the image I carried from Connecticut as we crossed over the Massachusetts state line. Chris Lucht, my friend and host
for the weekend, assured me that it wasn't as bad as everyone
said. Still, I thought, how can *everyone* possibly be wrong?
Friday afternoon began with my flight to Hartford and a karmic
encounter with a coaster family from Great Falls, Montana. Mark and Bonnie Such, their two little girls and a family friend were on their way to a week at CP, GL and KW. Bonnie saw my KW shirt as she sat down next to me, and the rest of our flight was
non-stop coaster talk! Her husband, Mark, is the real coaster
nut, and is even building a model replica of CP in their
basement! The entire family loves coaster riding, yet
surprisingly they had never heard of ACE or RRC. I told them how to find both on the internet, so perhaps one day we'll see them
at an event or even posting to the newsgroup!
My flight into Hartford was right on schedule, and Chris took me immediately from the airport straight to Riverside, a short trip that only took about 20 minutes.
The first thing that surprised me was Connecticut. I expected
non-stop city, but this was strictly countryside! The second we crossed over the Massachusetts state line, there it was:
Dum, da dum dum. RIVERSIDE.
The first thing I noticed at the gate were the interesting flower arrangements at the ticket booths. An unusual arrangement of
cascading panzies were hung from hidden plastic bags on each side of the booths. I've seen this "bag of flowers" in garden centers recently and its a clever and surprisingly attractive way to
spruce up an otherwise ordinary looking wall.
Part of the parking lot is gravel and really
needs to be paved, but we had no trouble finding a spot up close to the entrance.
Riverside has a huge and very attractive waterpark. Chris noted he was hoping for a separate entrance and admission to avoid some of the problems associated with combo parks. I agree, wet seats are a nuisance, but I'll save the "Waterparks: splashy fun or bacteria cesspools?" discussion for another thread.
We entered the gates and WHOA!!!
THIS IS RIVERSIDE?
Riverside Park is a surprisingly beautiful, traditional amusement park. The decor is an eye-catching blend of tradition and
whimsy. It is immaculately clean, well-staffed and well-run.
The crowds we encountered on Friday and Monday were
extraordinarily well-behaved, with not a single instance of line jumping or bad behavior. Friday night the crowds were so light
that only the Thunderbolt required a one train wait. On the
Cyclone, rerides *without leaving the station* became the order
of the night. Even on Monday, when the park was considerably
more crowded, we managed to get 3 rides on the Cyclone without
exiting the station.
This park is lovely! A gorgeous 1902 Grand Carousel fronts the
entrance, and a circular brick plaza provides a pleasant place to sit and watch the roving band of musicians. A charming, narrow
Main Street paved with brick leads you down to one of the most
whimsical and dazzling coaster signs I've ever seen, The
Thunderbolt.
We decided to ride Thunderbolt first since RRCer Kevin Dorey is
stationed there. I've chatted with Kevin many times on IRC but never had the chance to meet him, since he is *always* working at Riverside. Chris pointed him out to me and we shouted and waved. Also in the station waiting for us, as promised, were RRCers
Jason Pytka (HarryCalder) and Lee Moon (LAStarr4) along with a
friend of hers. I jokingly shouted to Kevin "Hey, quit working and come ride with us!" AND HE DID! I couldn't believe it when he plopped in the seat right in front of us! What a cool guy!
The Thunderbolt is an awesome, extremely underrated ride! It's a figure eight coaster that delivers a super-smooth ride with
plenty of airtime! Why don't people ever mention this coaster?
I could ride this baby over and over.
Unfortunately we couldn't begin to marathon since we had to leave in fifteen minutes to pick up Cindy Stout at the airport. So it was off for one ride on the, (gulp), CYCLONE.
I have only been nervous to ride one other coaster, Outer Limits. But I had read about the Cyclone and frankly, I was scared! This thing has a serious reputation! We walked up the hill and took a seat in the third row. The whole time I wondered if I'd be able to keep my hands up.
Not a prayer!
Oh my God, that first drop snuck up on us so quick I didn't have time to see what it looked like! OH MY GOOOOOOD!!! Aaaaaaah!!! We tore down and around the bend and up and over the second hill and okay, it's allright, you're allright, oh my god, you're okay. The next series of swoops - I think they're called hoop-de-doos, were fun, then we plunged down a long straight drop and
aaaaaaah!! around the next turnaround and into another
hoop-dee-do and then, get ready, cause OH SWEET JESUS SAVE ME!!!! We flew down a drop and came up and around and were thrown to the left and then down and around and thrown to the right and OH MY
GOD PLEEEEEEASE!!! then down another drop and a wicked throw to
the left and.........
Whew!
WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED???
The Cyclone was not exactly like I expected. I thought it would be a rough, bone-jarring ride. But this was not rough, it was
INTENSE! All those turns and dips and throws were incredible!
I couldn't wait to get a front seat ride!
But first we had to leave this surprisingly cool park to pick up Cindy at the airport. We set a time to meet up with Lee while
Jason walked us out to the car - it was nice meeting you,
HarryCalder!
Cindy's plane was 45 minutes late, and unfortunately we didn't
get back to the park until 10:05. What happened after that was
the best 55 minutes I've ever spent in a park! We took her to
Thunderbolt first, where once again Kevin rode with us. He
jumped in the front seat next to me for one last ride! Kevin is waaaaay cool and an incredibly dedicated employee. But mostly,
he's a very nice guy.
One other thing. I *want* that Thunderbolt sign! It is so cool, so neon, so fifties! It's my favorite coaster sign. Riverside
has lots of cool neon at night, which strangely enough turns this traditional looking park into a whimsical playground!
We then headed over to the Cyclone, where we later met up with
Lee and her friend Jerry. Only two people were waiting in the
queue. Cindy and I got our front seat ride. Chris told us to
lean way out over the front as we went down the drops. Oh my!!! That whole this-way-and-that-way bit turned us into screaming
ninnies!! Cindy got off and yelled "Now that's my kind of
coaster!!!"
Strangely enough we didn't even need to get off - no one was waiting in the queue so we hopped right back in!
After that, Chris suggested we go for a backseat ride. It was
already taken so we ended up fourth from the back. We had kept
our arms raised throughout our last ride, so we were ill-prepared for what happened to us on that first drop!!! We were both flung out of our seats and over the car and into each other and OH MY
GOD SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!!! I swear, both of us put our arms down and grabbed onto that car as hard as we could! That was amazing! Chris said the very back was even worse, and on Monday we rode in the next to last seat but it was surprisingly tolerable! No,
that fourth seat from the back will always be a nighttime terror to me.
We had so much fun that night. Unlike the rest of the country,
the air had cooled and we rode the Cyclone five straight times
without leaving the station. The ride ops gave us a double ride from the front seat as the park closed for the night.
I'm so glad we concentrated on just riding the woodies at night. Riverside has a couple of real gems and I applaud whoever did the reprofiling job on Cyclone. It's an outstanding coaster! I
truly envy everyone who'll be at the event this coming Sunday!
This park is just *such* a surprise!
Which led me to this thought: who's going to believe me?
*Everyone* hates Riverside, right? Well, everyone that was with me on Friday night *LOVED* it! I think I've just had a lucky
streak when it comes to visiting parks. As I said about SFKK,
had I been at the park on a hot, crowded day, perhaps my
impressions would have been different. All I can do is report
what happened and how it made me feel. Maybe in a few years the worm will turn and I'll be a cynical old enthusiass. In the
meantime I intend to enjoy the ride!!!!"
The next day we drove to Great Escape in New York. In some ways this park reminds me of Busch Gardens Williamsburg and
Hersheypark. It's very family oriented and has an odd layout,
with lots of banners, bridges, flags and secret passageways. At night we passed a beautiful row of fan lights with iron ribbons.
It also has one of my new favorite coasters, The Comet! Wow,
this coaster comes as advertised! We were joined on this day by Joe Schwartz and his shiny new camera, Chris Kearsing and his
adorable friend Cola with the little Olga Korbut pigtails, and
the lovely and talented Spatch, who is also the man with a
thousand voices!
But back to The Comet. This coaster is just incredible. As
Cindy put it, it's like The Phoenix with a kick. The lift hill
is so freakin' fast, and does it slow down as it reaches the top? NO! It speeds up!!
The first two drops are great fun, and the backseat is where the airtime is. After that, however, it doesn't matter where you sit - you're sure to get tossed from your seat and slammed to the
left not once but twice. I came to fear those two return runs!
This park, like Riverside the day before, was not at all crowded. What people were there were at the water park, which meant the
entire day we waited maybe 15 minutes for Boomerang and Alpine
Bobsleds, and 5 minutes or less for Steamin' Demon and The Comet.
Cahhhh-met.
The Steamin' Demon had a nice orange/yellow color scheme - very
unusual. It rode like a corkscrew. But the Boomerang was great fun - very smooth. The Alpine Bobsleds was alot of fun, and I
really liked the theming and paint job on this ride.
Unfortunately the Nightmare coaster wasn't open yet.
We rode alot of the flat rides, including the Mystery Dome, which Chris Lucht refused to describe but insisted it was scary.
"Yes," Cindy said, "as evidenced by the piano playing teddy bear on the sign above the entrance." We also rode the Condor, or did we? It was over so quickly none of us could be sure! We did
*not* ride the Sky Ride, since I had to be home on Monday
afternoon and didn't think it would make it back to the station
by then! This has to be the SLOWEST sky ride in the world! One man looked up at his wife and kid and shouted to them "you're STILL ON THAT THING??" But of all the flat rides, the one I am still recovering from is The Tornado. We concocted quite a story from the mural in that queue! All the people in the mural are
busy checking each other out. We spotted a potential love
triangle, with a man so taken by this fence-sitting woman with
killer thighs that he doesn't seem to notice he's walking
barefoot behind a cow! Watch your step! There was also a buxom beauty offering her fruit to a man who seems entirely too happy
with his pig. Anyway, the ride itself is just as disturbing.
Scary chickens! Scary chickens!!!
We also rode the log flume, which eventually turned into a rather crude porn performance by one of the lumberjacks and his log.
But this wasn't the only titillating sight. Perhaps Chris and
Cola would like to show you their picture!
We also went into Jungleland. Much to my surprise Chris Lucht
found a church for Susan and I to hold our wedding! We also
went across the swingin'est bridge I've ever seen! The swamp was very cool, and apparently there are motion effects that were not running on this day. At the end of the swingin'est bridge, we
came to the funniest sight I've ever seen at an amusement park.
Eog, the God of Constipation, stood before us trying desperately to squeeze one out. Chris Kearsing actually ran under the God
and pulled on the rope dangling from his legs! Or *was* it a
rope? Hmmm.....
The only thing that bothered me were the animal displays. The
cages are entirely too small for the animals to have any sort of quality of life. It just sickens me to see that, so I am writing a letter to Great Escape and I will not go back to Jungleland
until the situation improves. I also think it's time to remove
the spearchucker without a spear. It's cartoonish features are
racist and offensive.
One more small complaint. As pretty as this park is, why was no thought given to the theming around The Comet? All those water
rides look terrible around it. This coaster deserves a more
attractive presentation! Still, I suppose I shouldn't quibble
considering the effort that went into restoring it!
The waterpark closed at 6:00 and the park was virtually deserted for the remainder of the night. At 7:30 we went back to The
Comet, where we stayed for the next 2 hours and 15 minutes,
enjoying a virtual ERT session! Most rides were either walk-ons or stay-ons! What fun we had!!! Joe took our pictures as we
came off the lift hill. Chris and Cola sang "Bohemian Rapsody" during one ride, while Spatch sang an entire song using the voice of Cartman from South Park!
As the night wore on The Comet only increased in intensity. We
got major airtime coming in and out of each turnaround. Finally Cindy reached some sort of climax in the front seat when, just as we were about to plunge down the first drop, she threw her arms
outward and screamed "TAKE ME!!!" She then proceeded to perform the "Comet Ballet" during each turnaround, turning toward the mountain scenery and slowly throwing her arms outward. It was a very funny sight!>
Each ride got better and better. I liked the front seat of the
blue train the best, but Spatch preferred the third row. The
backseat was Joe's office. This tells you pretty much every seat on this ride is a winner.
As the night drew to a close a light rain began to fall. We were treated to a final few rides with wet track, including the last
ride of the night. I can only imagine what heights of ecstasy
Cindy might have reached had we continued riding in the rain.
This was one of the best nights of coastering I've ever had.
Riverside Park: Riverdump. A dirty, poorly run park with bad
employees, rough crowds, long lines and lousy operating policies.
Back to The Trip Report
Email: MarkinArk@earthlink.net
