Six Flags Elitch Gardens

This is the oddest park. It is so tiny, sandwiched in a triangular lot bordered by train tracks on one side and an interstate highway on the other. Why they chose to put it in a location which offers no possiblity for expansion is beyond me. This has to be the smallest of all the Six Flags parks. And without a doubt in my mind, it is unquestionably the worst. While the park, what there is of it, is very pretty, some of the things there are baffling. The entrance alone is bizarre, as you walk from the admission gate directly into an enclosed, circus-like tent that serves as a kind of Six Flags marketplace. Then when you walk down main street, you admire the attractive shrubbery and plants....until you look down and see that they've been planted in cheap, torn, plastic pots. You step in the chocolate factory only to find a nearly empty display case, with three trays displaying a total of five pieces of clearly outdated chocolate.

The worst thing about Six Flags Elitch Gardens is their coaster collection. Four coasters. A boomerang. An SLC. A hand-me-down shuttle loop. And Twister Two, a coaster so plagued with unpleasant roughness and shuffling it landed in my bottom ten even before the ride had ended! And in spite of the foreign exchange student ride op's instructions (delivered in his best, slinkiest 70's disco strut), I did not sit back and "en-JOY!"

What baffles me most about Six Flags Elitch Gardens is how the people of Denver embrace this place. They think it's absolutely the BEST! "They have sooooo many coasters there!" "The coasters there are so great!!! And a lot of them go upside down!" They have no idea how incredibly anemic this park is. What in the world did it have to offer before Six Flags took over? It doesn't even doesn't come close to the number of *awesome* rides available at nearby Lakeside. And yet Lakeside is seen as "old and run down" while Elitch Gardens, with a grand total of 24 rides (including non-thrill rides as well, three of which weren't operating), is embraced for being shiny and new. Four forgettable, one train coasters, long lines, outrageous prices. It boggles the mind why the people of Denver support this.

One train operation. On a *packed* Saturday. An hour and a half wait on Tower of Doom, thanks to two sides being inoperable. No water in the Shoot in the Chutes. No operating teacups or observation tower. Three dollar 20 oz. soft drink machines. And this is it, folks, there's no more room here to put anything.

Six Flags Elitch Gardens is the ultimate crappy corporate theme park.

Mark-
who spent well over a hundred dollars at Lakeside