CHRIS-"Why can't we leave, ya know I don't even like him all that much I'm pretty sure he doesn't even know my last name."
JUSTIN-"Yea I feel ya bro, but as long as the camera guy from Teen People's here, we are to, ya get me?"
CHRIS-"Of course I get you, what kind of moron do you think I am?"
JOEY-"The kind who's 30 years old and in a boy band, with no real girl friend!, DUH!!!!!!"
CHRIS-"What the hell is that supposed to mean, you know I'm just waiting for the right girl."
JUSTIN-"HEY! Everyone shut up, I don't want to have to pay another camera man off, I did enough of that when Britney and I started dating. Where J.C at? I know he didn't want to give any money to the party but he could have atleast showed up."
JOEY-"Yea what was wit dat? He's all 'My money's tied up in financing' what financing? Ever notice how he appears to never buy anything but always seems to be broke and a bit high-strung?"
CHRIS-"Whatever, are we going or what?"
Just then Lance swaggers into the room. He's wearing a ripped Gap sweater and jeans with flowers print (there's a shock)! He's carrying a large nap sack with the writing 'At the the bottom of the bottle is emptiness-not love!'
JUSTIN (making sure the camera man sees, runs to Lance)-"Buddy we missed you so much, how was space, was it awesome, well was it, was it?!"
LANCE (mumbles to himself)-"Accept them for who they are, refuse the earge to kill the young one."
CHRIS-"Thank god you're back man! The boy band phase is down and we need to hit and hit hard!"
Just then a sweaty, over-worked J.C runs into the room, slurring his speech, all the boys turn to him:
J.C-"Did someone say hit, 'cause I could really use, it's been som....@%***!"
JOEY-"At least I can talk right."
CHRIS-"The jury is still out on that one! HAHAHAHA!"
JOEY-"YA know I'm very mature and responsible now. I have a kid and everything.
JUSTIN-"Shut your mouth stupid, you have a kid...YES! You have many other kids that you don't take care of....YES! You aren't married or even dating the mother of your baby........YES! You mature,.....NO!"
LANCE-"So who wants to know how the clin.....I mean SPACE was?"
JOEY-"Did you bring me back the moon rock, straight from the moon, did ya?"
CHRIS-"You dumbass, he didn't go to the moon he went into outerspace."
JOEY-"Well isn't that like getting on a plane and circling the world and then landing where you came from?"
LANCE-"NO, everyone shut up!" (mumbles to himself)"resist the earge to kill them, meal ticket!" "Here's your moon rock Joey, the moon was very cool, and weighed like half of what I way here, which means my figure was awesome, and I could drink all the beers......HAHA I mean sodas I wanted."
JOEY-"See I told ya he went to the moon, I said my friend Lance is going to the moon and you did, your so my little buddy.........wait this says made in Taiwan. Lance?"
JUSTIN- You didn't go into space did you lance?
J.C-"I'm spacin' dude, Lance was it like this man........awesome!!!!!" (J.C stands there waving his own hand infront of his face and stops blinking.)
LANCE-(beginning to weep)-"I didn't go, they gave it to that girl, who had like experience and shit, and they said I had to give up drinking and I explained that I work with you guys and thus I'm hooked, I need it just to keep me straight."
JUSTIN-"Ummm...Lance, why did you lie?"
LANCE-"Well the people in Russia, bastards, said I had to go to this place and get help, and I couldn't let that get out I mean look at what happened to the Backstreet Boys...God rest their soul."
JOEY-"Ummm the Backstreet Boys aren't dead."
CHRIS-"After rehab, parole and and that last so called hit, they are dead!"
J.C-"HIT? Where, yo? Jay-Rome, where you at, bro?"
*J.C runs from the room and quickly runs back, he grabs the 'Welcome Back' cake and mumbles something about the munchies and being low on funds and runs out again.*
CHRIS-"Ummmm anyways, Most of them are in committed relationships now and teens can't follow that."
LANCE-"Committed, no I don't need to be, please no more, shocking it hurts, MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
*Lance runs from the room mumbling about his triumphant return to Mississippi.*
JUSTIN-"Great, now who's gonna forfit the money to pay off the camera man, I'm not I'm poor, it takes a lot of money to look this good and don't I look good, damn I look good!"
*Justin walks out fixing his hair, with no mirror near by, and his cell phone rings, he stops.*
JUSTIN (on the phone)"Bitch, I told you to leave my ass alone, if I can get JANET you are a waste of my time, and by the way I bought you the car, I own half the house and those *things* you play as real, are mine to, so you have other calls to make. I changed the locks on my house and car, so stay away, PINKY BITCH!"
JOEY-"Damn Justin is really mean to his Mom, huh?"
CHRIS-"Are you seriously that dumb! That is so sad."
JOEY-"No, sad is being over 30 and in a boy band. Excuse me I hear the baby crying I have to go."
*Joey exits the room in a hurry so he wont have to deal with the camera man.*
CHRIS (screaming to Joey)-"That noise is your stomach growling and atleast learn the baby's name!"
*Chris mumbles something about Danielle, being lonely and not having sex for over 2 years. He throws money at the camera man and starts to walk out."
THE CAMERA MAN-"OK I wont print any of it, but can I just get one question?"
CHRIS(stops walking) -"OK any free publicity for FU-MAN is good right? Shoot."
THE CAMERA MAN-"Did you miss Lance?"
CHRIS-'sighs'-"Yea we're all like brothers and I needs these guys.......Ya know what go to the store, buy a copy of Bop or BB o somehting teeny and re write one of those answers, believe me they're all the same.....oh and we love the fans and it's all them........blah blah blah, make somehting from that too. I'm out!"
THE CAMERA MAN-"ASS HOLE!"
*Chris snaps his fingers for the security to beat the man up but there are no security guys around! Lonny was fired because he was too overweight and couldn't chase over crazed teeny boppers. The rest were fired because J.C used up all the group funds on ....well you know. The camera man, insulted, runs towards Chris and beats the crap out of him with hi camera.*
Teen People never ran the story of Lance's welcome back party.
Rumors surfaced of Lance's stint in rehab, but the group and Johnny brushed these with 'No Comment'. Justin got his restraining order against Britney, one long and in the making.
J.C was caught selling Britney new copies of Justin's house keys for cash, which he said he was using to straighten out.
Lance was found one a street corner somewhere in Mississippi, mumbling about the good old days, Toby, and begging for a bottle of whiskey.
Joey is still content with his kindof girlfriend and the house he lives in with her and the baby, he still has yet to remember her name.
~BY: Brianne
