DEVON: "What does a girl have to do to impress you?"
OZ: "Well, it involves a feather boa and the theme to A Summer Place. I can't discuss it here."
CORDELIA: "Is Mr. I'm-the-lead-singer, I'm-so-great, I-don't-have-to-show-up-for-my-date-or-even-call gonna be there?
OZ: "Yeah, you know, he's just going by 'Devon' now.
CORDELIA: "Well, you can tell him that I don't care, and that i didn't even mention it, and that I didn't even see you. So that's just fine."
OZ: "So...what do I tell him?"
CORDELIA: "Nothing! Jeez, get with the program!"
OZ: "Why can't I meet a nice girl like THAT?"
OZ: (to Willow)"Canape?"
***
BUFFY: "Try it!" (as she slams the poor by up against the wall...)
OZ: "Try what?"
BUFFY: "I'm sorry..."
OZ: "Still not clear what I'm supposed to try..."
BUFFY: "Nothing. God..I'm..sorry." (as she walks away)
OZ: "There's a tense person."
WILLOW: "Hey. Your hair. Is brown."
OZ: "Uh, yeah. Sometimes."
***
OZ: "I'm not really a computer person, ya know. Or a work of any kind person."
WILLOW: "Then, uh, why'd they select you?"
OZ: "Well, I sorta test well, ya know, which is cool. Except when it leads to jobs."
***
OZ: "E flat...it's do-able. But that diminished ninth? That's a man's chord. You could lose a finger."
***
BUFFY: "Are you OK?"
OZ: "Oh, yeah. I'm shot, ya know? I mean, wow. It's odd. And painful."
***
OZ: "Oh, hey! Animal Cracker?"
WILLOW: "No, thank you. How's your arm?"
OZ: "Suddenly painless."
WILLOW: "You can still play the guitar OK?"
OZ: "Well, not well. But, I mean, not worse."
WILLOW: "You know, I never really thanked you."
OZ: "Oh, no. Please don't. I don't do 'thanks'. I get all red. Have to bail. It's not pretty."
***
OZ: "Oh, look, monkey! And he has a little hat and little pants."
WILLOW: "Yeah. I-I-I see."
OZ: "The monkey is the only cookie animal who gets to wear clothes, you know that? You have the sweetest smile I've ever seen... So, I'm wondering, do the other cookie animals feel sorta ripped? Like, is the hippo going 'Hey man! Where are _my_ pants? I have my hippo dignity!'. And, you know, the monkey's just 'I mock you with my monkey pants!'.
WILLOW: (laughs)
OZ: "And then there's a big coup at the zoo."
WILLOW: "The monkey is French?"
OZ: "All monkeys are French. You didn't know that?"
WILLOW: "Do you guys, uh, have a gig tonight?"
OZ: "Oh, no, practice. See, our band's kind of moving towards this new sound where...we suck, so...practice."
WILLOW: "I bet you have lots of groupies."
OZ: "It happens. I'm living groupie free nowadays. I'm clean."
WILLOW: "Oh."
OZ: "I'm gonna ask you to go out with me tomorrow night, and I'm kinda nervous about it actually. It's interesting."
WILLOW: "Oh. Well, if it helps at all, I'm gonna say 'yes'."
OZ: "Yeah, it helps. It-it creates a comfort zone. Do you wanna go out with me tomorrow night?"
WILLOW: "Oh! I can't!"
OZ: "Well, see, I like that you're unpredictable."
***
CORDELIA: "Surprise!"
OZ: "That pretty much sums it up."
***
OZ: "Hey, did everybody see that guy turn to dust?"
WILLOW: "Oh. Well, uh, sort of..."
XANDER: "Yup. Vampires are real. 'Lot of them live in Sunnydale. Willow will fill you in."
WILLOW: "I know it's hard to accept at first."
OZ: "Actually, it explains alot!"
***
WILLOW: "What was that?"
OZ: "It looked like an arm."
OZ: "So, you guys steal from the Army alot?"
WILLOW: "Well, we don't have cable, so we have to make our own fun."
***
WILLOW: "Do you wanna make out with me?"
OZ: "What?!"
WILLOW: "Forget it. I'm sorry. Well, do you?"
OZ: "Sometimes, when I'm sitting in class--you know, I'm not thinking about class, 'cause that would never happen--I think about kissing you. And, it's like everything stops. It's like, it's like...freeze frame. Willow kissage. (pauses) Oh, I'm not gonna kiss you."
WILLOW: "What? But...freeze frame!"
OZ: "Well, to the casual observer, it would appear that you're trying to make your friend Xander jealous, or even the score...or something. And that's on the empty side. See, in my fantasy, when I'm kissing you, you're kissing me. It's ok, I can wait."
WILLOW: "Hi."
OZ: "Oh, that's what I was gonna say."
***
WILLOW: "What are you looking at?"
OZ: "This cheerleading trophy. It's like its eyes follow you wherever you go. I like it."
***
LARRY: "Oz, man, I would love to get some of that Buffy 'n Willow action, if you know what I mean."
OZ: "That's great, Larry, you've really mastered the single entendre."
***
LARRY: "Oh, let me guess, that little innocent schoolgirl thing just, uh, an act, right?"
OZ: "Yeah, yeah, she's acctually an evil mastermind. It's fun."
***
LARRY: "Oh, last week, some huge dog jumped out of the bushes and bit me. Thirty-nine stiches. They ouughta shoot them strays."
OZ: "I've been there, man. My cousin Jordy just got his grown-up tooth in. Does not like to be tickled."
***
OZ: "I spoke to Giles. He said I'll be okay, I just have to lock myself up around the full moon. Only he used more words than that...and a globe..."
***
WILLOW: "I'm sorry about how this ended up, with me shooting you and all..."
OZ: "It's okay. I'm-I'm sorry I almost ate you."
WILLOW: "It's okay."
***
OZ: "I mean, it's not everyday you find out you're...a werewolf. That's fairly freaksome."
WILLOW: "Well, I like you. You're nice and you're funny and you don't smoke. Yeah, okay, werewolf...but that's not all the time. I mean, three days out of the month, I'm not much fun to be around either."
OZ: "You are quite the human being."
***
OZ: "A werewolf in love..."
OZ: *punches Xander* "That kinda hurt."
XANDER: "'Kinda?!?' What was that for?"
OZ: "I was on the phone all night, listening to Willow cry about you. Now, I don't know exactly what happened, but I was left with a very strong urge to hit you."
***
OZ: (to the Buffy rat) "Here Buffy..."
***
BUFFY: "I seem to be having a slight case of nudity here."
OZ: "But you're not a rat...so call it an upside."
WILLOW: "You're going to pass everything. I'm going to get you through this semester if I have to sweat blood."
XANDER: "Do you think you're likely to? 'Cause I'd like to be elsewhere."
WILLOW: "It was only metaphor blood."
OZ: "I think you'd sweat cute blood."
***
OZ: "How are you feelin'?"
WILLOW: "My head feels big. Is it big?"
OZ: "No, it's head-sized."
***
OZ: "Okay, I pretty much missed out on some stuff, didn't I? Cause this is all making the kind of sense that's...not."
***
OZ: "But, we know the world didn't end 'cause...check it out.
