SO YOU CAN'T GET ENOUGH RENT
Here is a list for all u RENTheads or RENTfreaks who are having withdrawl
symptoms from not having enough RENT. Note this is a joke, please do not blame
me for anything that happens as a result of following this list to the T.
1. If you live in a city or close to a city where RENT will be showing, rushing
for front row RENT tickets is a must. Trust me it is the best experience ever!
2. Make ruffle butt undies like Angel's. I did it and I wear them under my skirts. cute, cute, cute...
3. Wear cat ears to school. Meow.
4. Play the pickle tub for the school talent show.
5. Instead of starting a food fight in school, during lunch get all your friends
to dance with you on the tables while singing La Vie Boheme. When the principle
comes, claim you were only trying to bring culture to the other students.
6. Make up you own RENT holiday and petition to get the day off from school.
7. When assigned to write essays and speeches, write about RENT.
8. Wear a fuzzy green belt, if you can't find one make one yourself.
9. Buy a cow bell. No even better, buy a cow and call it Elsie.
10. For prom get your guy friend to dress up like Angel and you dress up like
Collins.
11. Rewrite RENT in another language.
12. Actually go to the opera La Boheme.
13. Call Ricki Lake and suggest a show about overobsessive RENT fans and then
demand to be featured on it.
14. Coreograph your own lawn chair handcuff dance.
15. Beg your director to put on RENT as the next school play and when he says
"no" start singing the whole show to get him hooked.
16. Buy a pair of Doc Martins and make everyone kiss them.
17. Have RENT character look alike contests.
18. Wear thongs and moon EVERYONE.
19. Open up your own Clit Club.
20. Go to the theater where RENT is currently showing dressed as your favorite
RENT character and see if anyone asks for your autograph.
21. Dress in anything vinyl or leopard print and claim you are Mimi.
22. Videotape your friends' lives like Mark did and have a community screening.
Act embarrassed when you forget that you taped Nicki on the pot.
23. Have a dance contest and dance your lawn chair handcuff dance there. Give
the proceeds to your favorite AIDS charity in honor of Jonathan Larson.
24. When your director still says "no" brake into the theater and put on your
own production of RENT.
25. Dress like Mimi or Angel for your school pictures and when your mom freaks
out tell her you forgot what day it was.
26. Tattoo all the RENT characters names on your body with hearts around each one.
27. When you turn 18, try out for a part in RENT. Even if you are not 18, get a fake ID to be able to try out for a part.
28. Hook your grandparents onto RENT. Trust me, it's harder than you think.
29. Start a RENT support group to help your fellow RENTfreaks and call it RENTannonymous.
30. Start a RENT inspired fashion line.
31. Go to every single RENT site on the net and email all the beautiful people who created the sites (hint, hint)
32. Learn how to knit, so you can create a blue and white scarf like Mark's.
33. Make a RENT scrapbook with photos from RENT performances, newspaper clippings about RENT, autographs, illicit photos of luther creek on toilet...
34. Pretend kissing Roger, so when you have your first onstage kiss with him as Mimi, you will be ready.
35. When you leave messages on people's answering machines, pretend to be a RENT character. "Hi this is Mimi Marquez, and I am just calling to let you know about my latest performance of my lawnchair hand-cuff dance at the Lion's Paw Club." Or, "Hello, this is Benjamin Coffin the third and I am notifying you ahead of time that I will be baracading the door to your apartment." "Hi Angel here, anybody got any wine and beer?"
36. Write an autobiography about how RENT has changed your life.
37. Make friends with the security guards where RENT is currently playing so you can get in the back. Or if all the guards look too scary, sneak in.
38. Plaster your walls with as many RENT pictures as you can find. There better not be any plaster showing when I come to visit.
39. Make a RENT videogame. Object is to annihalate Benny in the time given so the protest can go on.
40. On New Years, come riding in on a motorcycle dressed in a catsuit. This is a great one for the boys to do.
41. Sing RENT songs on the elevator.
42. Get a specialized liscense plate that reads something like "RENT" or "NODAYBUT2DAY" or "525600MINUTES" or "SEASONSOFLUV"
43. Start an official RENT religion.
44. Have an Anthony Rapp movie-marathon. Make sure you don't forget to rent "Adventures in Babysitting" and "Dazed and Confused."
45. Buy Idena Menzel's CD. Who even needs to be told?
Click your heels three times. There's no place like home.
Email: calicochick@hotmail.com