(the author of this article is divorced)
It is sad that according to statistics, there are practically as many divorces among those calling themselves Christians as there are among those who don’t. But is this how it is supposed to be? Is divorce scriptural? Can a Christian ever get a divorce? If so, then what are scriptural grounds for divorce. I’m not sure that I have a definitive answer to all of these questions, but I have studied this issue, because it affected me personally.
To start off, lets see what scripture does say concerning divorce.
Malachi 2:13-17
13: And this have ye done again, covering the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping, and with crying out, insomuch that he regardeth not the offering any more, or receiveth it with good will at your hand. 14: Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. 15: And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. 16: For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away (divorce): for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously. 17: Ye have wearied the LORD with your words. Yet ye say, Wherein have we wearied him? When ye say, Every one that doeth evil is good in the sight of the LORD, and he delighteth in them; or, Where is the God of judgment?Malachi 2:16 says that God hates putting away, which is a Biblical term for divorce.
So, God hates divorce. That is very strong, and is still true today.What does the law of Moses say:
Deuteronomy 24:1
1: When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house.Here it says that a man may give his wife a divorce if he finds any uncleanness in her. Wow! What does that mean? It means if she is not sexually pure. Today, it would be rare to find a woman who is sexually pure at all. Does that mean that we can all just run out and get a divorce whenever we want, since probably neither of us were virgins to start with?
I think not, listen to what Jesus says:Matthew 5:31-32
31: It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: 32: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.Mark 10:2-12
2: And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. 3: And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? 4: And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. 5: And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. 6: But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. 7: For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; 8: And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. 9: What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 10: And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter. 11: And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. 12: And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.Jesus says that the only grounds for divorce is fornication.
And that to get a divorce and then to remarry is to commit adultery.
Kind of makes one think twice about remarriage, huh?So where does this leave us? I think this all means just exactly what it says.
That God hates divorce, that you better be very sure about why you are getting a divorce and if you do and remarry, you will be committing adultery.Well, we could just leave it at that, but we would not be covering this issue very well. Each situation is different. I think that in most cases of divorce, it is unscriptural. I will say it again, I think most of the Christians getting divorces, are doing so against the scriptures, and more importantly against Jesus’ direct word.
According to Jesus, we can only get a divorce if there is a case of fornication, right? So what is fornication? The Webster dictionary says fornication is: “Voluntary sexual intercourse between two unmarried people.” Again I say, that would apply to most of the married people of our generation. But is that the Biblical definition of the word fornication.
Since, this is Jesus (God) talking here, it is most important that we understand what He means. The word that Jesus used for fornication in the greek is “porneia”, which means whoredom and which is also the same root word that we get the word pornography from. Interesting, isn’t it?
I think there is much more to this than meets the eye initially.
I have heard some argue (and I must say, it sounds very convincing) that what Jesus meant by fornication is if the woman was in any way compensated, in the way of payment, for any kind of sexual performance or act. Now that would leave most of us out of the running, wouldn’t it?
Now of course Jesus is the final authority on anything and everything, at least for me He is. But the apostle Paul also had a thing or two to say. Paul himself never married. Here he gives council to the widows (not divorced) and the unmarried women and then to the married:
I Corinthians 7:8-16
8: I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. 9: But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. 10: And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. 12: But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. 13: And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14: For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 15: But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. 16: For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?Ok, so Paul says that if a Christian is married to a non-Christian, that the Christian should not leave the other, or file for divorce. But that if the non-christian spouse does it that the Christian spouse should let them go. However, we are still left with the idea that remarriage is out of the question.
So scripturally, we have two cases for divorce: fornication and if the non-Christian spouse wants it.
I believe there is one more, although I don’t find any scriptural backing for it. That is in the case of abuse. If the life of the wife or children are in danger, I believe this is grounds for divorce or at least separation.
However, in none of these cases does it ever say that a person may remarry. To the contrary, Jesus says it is adultery.
If your ex-spouse dies though, then you are a widow/widower and the Bible says you may remarry.
Remember, no murderers will enter the kingdom of God.
Revelation 21:8
But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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