First off, the vast majority of the people there were only there to see Marilyn Manson. For all they cared, the act on before Manson could have been Big Bird. So picture this: you're in a band, and you're coming back to your hometown to play what you've convinced yourself is going to be the best gig ever. Instead, you're greeted by an audience of people who are obviously there only to see the band after you, and are staring boredly into space, praying (well, maybe not praying, judging by the people we're talking about) that you'll be done soon. Would you be too enthusiated?

Seriously, I'm pretty convinced that the only people there to see Hole were me and five girls in the back that kept yelling "C O U R T N E Y!" from the back row before the concert started.

And not only was there no one there who appreciated her, the people there weren't just sitting silently, patiently waiting for Manson. They decided to do something about it. They started yelling bad things and one guy had the nerve to yell "Take it off!". I don't know if this is true, but I heard later that some guy in the mosh pit threw his, um, love juice at Courtney. If that really happened, then I don't blame her for leaving early.

I wasn't pissed becuz she left early and threw a tantrum, I was pissed that I didn't get to hear "Celebrity Skin". The crowd was treating her like crap, so she treated them like crap.

The other person that reviewed said that nobody really cared that she was from Portland, but she kept going on and on about it anyway. Well, ya know what? I care. I'm pretty sure those five girls cared. I feel proud to hear that my favorite celebrity is from my town. So quit your whining, quit being such brats. Courtney's proud she's from Portland, or else she wouldn't mention it at all.

So they leave, Manson comes out (on a huge cross, no less), and he plays, yadayadayada, and the crowd loves him. I don't get it. I just don't get it. I mean, the guy pretended to masturbate with his microphone, and the crowd was cheering him on! I left early.

Moral of the story? If you go to a Hole show, you expect the unexpected. I'll admit, this is not Los Angeles. This is not New York. This is dreary, purist, stands-for-something Portland. Here, rock stars don't throw temper tantrums. For that matter, there is no such thing as a rock star. But, to paraphrase myself, if you go to a Hole show, you expect the unexpected. Sorry guys.

TANTRUMPALOOZA
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OK, so there were some empty seats at the Rose Garden Saturday night. What does this mean? Pretty simple...it means that the bill of Hole and Manson can't sell the place out. How does Courtney Love see it? That everyone in Portland knows that she grew up here, thinks that she is a Bad Person, and consequently stayed away from the show. And furthermore, the people who DID show up all banded together and agreed to give her a lukewarm reception because they are, as she put it several times, "conflicted" over liking her music but at the same time not liking the fact that she's from here.

Right.

It seems to me that she had built this date up in her mind to be some sort of glorious homecoming show where she would walk out to thunderous applause and banners reading: "Welcome Home, Courtney! We Love You!!".

There are a couple of, er... holes in this theory.

1) I would venture to say that, until she announced as much,

fewer than one third of the audience was aware that she grew up in Portland.

2) Even fewer really cared.

3) Probably 80 percent of the crowd was there to see Manson, judging by the sea of torn black fishnet, smeared black mascara, and teased black hair. (And you should have seen the WOMEN! Ba-dum-bum.)

So, how does Courtney handle this situation? Does she charge ahead full bore and show these provincial ingrates what a REAL rock 'n roll show looks like? Does she make some local references, get some good response (which she did get at first), and use that energy to work the audience up?

Nope.

She begins to heap abuse on us. Lo and behold, this results in dampening a fair amount of enthusiasm. How does she handle this development? More abuse.

Finally, Courtney decides that she's had enough and walks off. Nice. Take your frustrations out on the Portland fans who DID buy your albums and DID pay $30 each to come see you play!

At least Manson made a halfhearted effort to put on a show before he, too, threw a hissy fit and stalked off, after announcing that we just saw him play the last song of his career. OK, sure, dude....whatever.

I'm just glad that there are still bands around like Monster Magnet. They didn't have glitter shot from cannons or fireworks going off overhead, but those guys rocked! Being the opener, they were looking at more empty seats than either Hole or Manson, but did they whimper and pout? Hell, no...they roared through their set like they were playing to a crowd of 200,000! That's the way it's done, boys and girls.

I've bought several Hole and Manson CD's, and also shelled out $60 (plus parking) for the concert, but I don't think I'll be spending any more money on Courtney or Marilyn any time soon. Their next dinners at Spago will just have to be on somebody else's dime.