Buffy Sounds
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Angel: Don't worry, I don't bite.
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Buffy: First of all, what's with the outfit? Live in the now, you look like Debarge.
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Buffy: Now, we can do this the hard way or...well, actually, there's just the hard way.
Darla: That's fine with me.
Buffy: Are you sure? Now this is not gonna be pretty. We're talking violence, strong language, adult content.
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Buffy: Hi, I'm Buffy.
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Buffy: You need a personality, stat.
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Buffy: Seize the moment, cuz tomorrow, you might be dead.
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Buffy: Hi, I'm an enormous slut. Hello, would you like a copy of the Watchtower.
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Buffy: Who are you?
Angel: Let's just say, I'm a friend.
Buffy: Yeah, maybe I don't want a friend.
Angel: I didn't say I was yours.
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Buffy: What do you want?
Angel: The same thing you do.
Buffy: Okay. What do I want?
Angel: To kill 'em. To kill 'em all.
Buffy: Sorry, that's incorrect. But, you do get this watch and a year's supply of turtle wax. What I want is to be left alone.
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Cordelia: Willow, nice dress. Good to know you've seen the softer side of Sears.
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Cordelia: God! What is your childhood trauma?!
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Xander: Can I have you. Uh...can I help you.
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Xander: Well, not much goes on in a one Starbuck's town like Sunnydale.
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Xander: Oh, me and Buffy go way back. Old friends, very close. Then, there was that period of estrangement, where I think we were both growing as people. But, now here we are like old times. I'm quite moved.
Jesse: Is it me, or are you turning into a bibbling idiot?
Xander: Uh...it's not you.
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Buffy: If you are hanging around, I'd like to know why.
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Buffy: You read my diary? That is not ok. A diary is like a person's
most private possession. You don't even know what I was writing about.
Hunk can mean a lot of things, bad things. And, and when said his eyes
were penetrating, I meant bulging.
Angel: Buffy...
Buffy: A doesn't even stand for Angel for that matter. It
stand for Awsman, a charming foreign exchange student. And that whole fantasy
part has nothing to even do with you, at all...
Angel: Your mother moved your diary when she came in to straighten
up. I watched her from the closet. I didn't read it, I swear.
Buffy: Oh.
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Buffy: I know you're there, and I know what you are.
Angel: Do you? I'm just an animal, right?
Buffy: You're not an animal. Animals, I like.
Angel: Let's get it done.
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Angel: I just wanted to see if you were ok and your mother.
Buffy: We're both good. You?
Angel: If I can go a little while without being shot or stabbed,
I'll be allright. Look, this can't...
Buffy: ...ever be anything. I know. For one thing, you're
like 224 years older than I am.
Angel: I just gotta...walk away from this.
Buffy: I know, me too.
Angel: This is...
Buffy: ...painful. I know. See you around?
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Angel: Hello lover. I wasn't sure you'd come.
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Angel: I wanted to say goodbye first. You are the one thing in this dimension I will miss.
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Angel: There's moments in your life that make you, that set the course for who you're going to be. Sometimes they're little subtle moments, sometimes they're not. I'll show you what I mean.
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Buffy: You know, polite people call before they jump out of the bushes and attack you.
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Buffy: I want you to get a message to Angel for me. Tell him I'm done waiting, I'm taking the fight to him. You got that? You want me to write it down for you?
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Buffy: This is a beautiful moment we're having, can we please fight?
Angel: I didn't come here to fight.
Buffy: No?
Angel: I was hoping we can get back together. What do you think? Do we have a shot? Alright, we'll fight.
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Buffy: Look on the bright side, it'll all be over soon.
Angel: Yes, my love, it will.
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Angel: That's everything, huh? No weapons, no friends, no hope. Take all that away and what's left?
Buffy: Me.
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Angel: Buffy? What's going on? Where are we? I don't remember.
Buffy: Angel?
Angel: You're hurt. I feel like I haven't seen you in months. Everything's so muddled. What's happening?
Buffy: Shhh. Don't worry about it. I love you.
Angel: I love you.
Buffy: Close your eyes.
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Buffy: Okay, that was equal parts protecting me and coping a feel, right?
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Buffy: Mom, I'm a vampire slayer.
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Buffy: Hello lover.
Angel: I don't have time for you.
Buffy: You don't have a lot of time left.
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Buffy: I'm a vampire slayer.
Joyce: Well, I just don't accept that.
Buffy: Open your eyes mom. What do you think has been going on for the past two years? The fights, the weird occurrences. How many times have you washed blood out of my clothing and you still haven't figured it out?
Joyce: Well, it stops now.
Buffy: No, it doesn't stop. It never stops. Do you think I chose to be like this? Do you have any idea how lonely it is? How dangerous? I would love to be upstairs watching TV, or gossiping about boys, or God, even studying. But I have to save the world, again.
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Buffy: I lost a friend tonight...
Spike: I wasn't in on that raiding party.
Buffy: ...and I may lose more. The whole Earth may be sucked into Hell and you want my help because your girlfriend's a big ho? Well, let me take this opportunity to not care.
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Joyce: I mean, have you tried not being a slayer?
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Joyce: It's because you didn't have a strong father figure, isn't it?
Buffy: It's just fate mom, I'm the slayer, accept it.
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Joyce: Have we met?
Spike: You hit me with an axe one time. Remember, get the hell away from my daughter?
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Spike: I want to save the world.
Buffy: Okay, you do remember you're a vampire, right?
Spike: We like to talk big, vampires do. I'm going to destroy the world, it's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is I like this world. You've got dog racing, Manchester United, and you got people. Billions of people walking around like happy meals with legs.
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Spike: Will you hold on a second. Hey, white flag here, I quit.
Buffy: Let me clear this up for you, we're mortal enemies, we don't get time outs.
From the best episode yet "Amends" :
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Buffy: Angel.
Angel: I bet half the kids down there are already awake. Lying in their beds, sneaking downstairs... waiting for day.
Buffy: Angel please. I need you to get inside. There's only a few minutes left.
Angel: I know. I can smell the sunrise long before it comes.
Buffy: I don't have time to explain this, you'll just have to trust me. That thing that was haunting you...
Angel: It wasn't haunting me. It was showing me.
Buffy: Showing you?
Angel: What I am.
Buffy: Were.
Angel: And ever shall be. I wanted to know why I was back, now I do.
Buffy: You don't know. Some great evil takes credit for bringing you back and you buy it? You just give up?
Angel: I can't do it again Buffy. I can't become a killer.
Buffy: Then fight it.
Angel: It's too hard.
Buffy: Angel, please, you have to get inside.
Angel: It told me to kill you. You were in the dream, you know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again.
Buffy: I know what it told you. What does it matter?
Angel: Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly. I want to take comfort in you and I know it will cost me my soul and a part of me doesn't care. I'm weak, I've never been anything else. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy, it's the man.
Buffy: You're weak, everybody is. Everybody fails. Maybe this evil did bring you back. But if it did, it's because it needs you. And that means you can hurt it. Angel, you have the power to do real good, to make amends. But if you die now, then all that you ever were was a monster. Angel, please, the sun is coming up.
Angel: Just go.
Buffy: I won't.
Angel: What? You think this is simple? You think there's an easy answer? You can never understand what I've done. Now go.
Buffy: You are not staying here, I won't let you...
Angel: Am I a thing worth saving? Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone.
Buffy: What about me? I love you so much. And I tried to make you go away. I killed you and that didn't help. And I hate it. I hate that it's so hard. And that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did because you did it to me. God... I wished that I wished you dead. You know, I can't.
Angel: Buffy, please. Just this once, let me be strong.
Buffy: Strong is fighting. It's hard and it's painful and it's everyday. It's what we have to do and we can do it together. But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world, I don't know what can. But don't expect me to watch, and don't expect me to mourn for you because...
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Buffy: A race of female demon warriors... who celebrate victory in battle by eating their foes. They couldn't just pour Gatorade on each other?
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Buffy: I don't know what to do.
Angel: Let me decide for you. I can face this thing.
Buffy: You can't.
Angel: I can at least buy you enough time for Willow's spell to bind it. Buffy, this is worse than anything we've ever faced. It's the only way.
Buffy: I can't watch you die again.
Angel: I love you.
Buffy: I love you.
Angel: Nothing can change that, not even death.
Buffy: Don't talk to me like that. You may be ready to go, but I am not ready to lose you. Okay, this is my fight. And if you won't do it my way...
Xander: [cough] Hey. I've go this um... there's this uh... this is probably a bad time. Can I help?
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Buffy: Xander, one of these days you're gonna get yourself hurt.
Faith: Or killed.
Buffy: Or both. And with the pain and the death, maybe you shouldn't be leaping into the fray like that. Maybe you should be fray adjacent.
Xander: Excuse me? Who at the crucial moment distracted the lead demon by allowing her to pummel him about the head?
Faith: Yeah, that was real manly how you shrieked and all.
Xander: I think you'll find that was more of a bellow.
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Buffy: What should be do with the trio over here? Should we burn them?
Willow: I've brought marshmallows.
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Buffy: There's something about this one... that scares me. I need my Willow.
Willow: Aww.
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Buffy: What is this?
Xander: What do you mean what is this? It's my thing.
Willow: Your thing?
Buffy: Is this a penis metaphor?
Xander: It's my thing that makes me cool. You know, that makes me unique. I'm car guy, guy with the car.
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Cordelia: Boy, of all the humiliations you've had I've witnessed, that was the latest.
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Cordelia: Look, it's Mr. Excitement. On another life or death donut mission or are we just cruising for bimbos again? Giving them lessons in lack of cool. What? What? What?!
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Cop: What's going on?
Jack: Nuthin'. Just wrasslin'.
Cop: O'Toole, what a surprise. He attack you?
Xander: No. Just blowing off steam. Two guys wrasslin'... but not in a gay way.
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Cordelia: Ooh, some evil going on? Must be big for them to entrust you with this daredevil mission.
Xander: Cordelia, feel free to drop dead of a wasting disease in the next 20 seconds.
Cordelia: Ooh, again I strike the nerve. I am the surgeon of mean.
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Faith: That was great, I gotta shower.
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Faith: She got me really wound up. A fight like that and no kill. I'm about ready to pop.
Xander: Really? Pop?
Faith: You up for it?
Xander: Oh, I'm up. I'm suddenly very up. It's just um... I've never been up with people before.
Faith: Just relax. Take your pants off.
Xander: Those two concepts are antithetical.
Faith: Don't worry, I'll steer you around the curves.
Xander: Did I mention that I'm having a very strange night.
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Giles: All we know, the fate of the entire world rest on the... did you eat all the jellies.
Buffy: Did you want a jelly?
Giles: I always have a jelly. I'm the one that says let's have jelly in the mix.
Willow: We're sorry. Buffy had 3.
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Giles: You're cutting it a bit close.
Oz: Well, you know me.
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Giles: There's something different about this. Something in the air... stench of death.
Xander: Yeah, I think it's Bob.
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Jack: Are you scared?
Xander: Would that make you happy?
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Willow: I'm fine. The shaking is a side effect of the fear.
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Willow: I love you Xander.
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Willow: Occasionally, I'm callous and strange.
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Willow: And if it opens?
Buffy: Do you remember the demon that almost got out the night I died?
Willow: Every nightmare I have that doesn't revolve around academic failure or public nudity is about that thing. In fact, once, I dreamt that it attacked me while I was late for a test and naked.
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Willow: Even after the Hellmouth was closed, we could still hear it screaming.
Oz: But Angel's gonna be okay?
Buffy: He was only out for a few minutes... longest of my life.
Willow: I'll never forget that thing's face. It's real face, I mean.
Giles: Yes.
Buffy: I don't know how you managed to... it was the bravest thing I've ever seen.
Giles: Stupidest. But the world continues to turn.
Willow: No one will ever know how close it came to stopping. Never know what we did.
Xander: Guys.
Willow: Xander, boy, you're lucky you weren't at school last night. It was crazed.
Xander: Well, give me the quiet life.
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Willow: Evil.
Xander: Big?
Buffy: Biggest. Maybe more than I can handle.
Xander: Then we're all in it together. You know I'm here for you. Just tell me what I can do. I'll take two glazed, two cinnamon, a couple cream filled, and a jelly. No, let's round that out to four jellies.
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Xander: They're probably loaded with supplies. Gotta think. I can't believe I had sex. Okay, bombs. Already dead guys with bombs.
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Xander: I say bring 'em on!
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Xander: Hey! They're not baking any cake.
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Xander: This time of night, I'm pretty sure nothing's open... they're always open for crime. Okay, now I'm involved in crime. I'm the criminal element. Having a car sure is cool!
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Xander: Alright, enough! You guys have had your fun.
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Xander: I say that's pretty much enough excitement for one evening.
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Xander: Giles'll know what to do. He's way more calm than Buffy.
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Xander: Good boy.
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Xander: Hello nasty.
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Xander: Hey, what's going on?
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Xander: Less than two minutes. Dumb guy, little bomb. How hard can it be?
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Xander: Shoulda learned by now, if you're gonna play with fire, you gotta expect sooner or later... I wasn't finished! Note to self, less talk.
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Xander: Oh gee, I'm really sorry that my life and death situation isn't exciting enough for you.
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Xander: You girls need a lift?
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Xander: Where's a Slayer when you need one?
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Xander: I don't think I wanna be seeing you on campus anymore, Jack.
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Xander: Angel! Buddy. Friend buddy. You wanna sit and talk?
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Xander: You know, it's not like I haven't helped before. I've done some quality violence for those people. Do they even think about that?
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Cordelia: Oh what, you got a shiny car and now you're someone new? Like anyone even cares about your...
Some Car Groupie: Is that your car?
Xander: Why... yes it is.
Some Car Groupie: 57 Chevy. 283 CID. Solid lifter. Fuel Injected V8?
Xander: Uh... very possibly.
Some Car Groupie: How does she handle?
Xander: Like a dream about warm sticky things.
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Xander: I could have taken him.
Cordelia: Oh please. O'Toole would macrame your face. He is a psycho. Which is still a lot cooler than being a wuss.
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Xander: Why is it that I've come face to face with vampires, demons, the most hideous creature Hell will ever spit out and I'm still afraid of a little bully like Jack O'Toole.
Cordelia: Because unlike all those other creatures you've come face to face with, Jack actually noticed you were there.
Xander: Why am I surprised by how comforting you're not?
Cordelia: It must be real hard when all you're friends have superpowers- Slayer, werewolf, witches, vampires, and you're like this little nothing. You must feel like Jimmy Olson.
Xander: I was just talking to... hey, mind your own business.
Cordelia: Ooh, I struck a nerve. The boy that had no cool.
Xander: I happen to be an integral part of that group. I happen to have a lot to offer.
Cordelia: Oh, please.
Xander: I do.
Cordelia: Integral part of the group? Xander, you're the useless part of the group. You're the Zeppo. Cool, look it up. It's something that a sub-literate that's repeated 12th grade three times has and you don't. There was no part of that that wasn't fun.
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Xander: Gee Mr. White, if Clark and Lois get all the good stories, I'll never be a good reporter.
Giles: Hmm?
Xander: Jimmy Olson jokes are pretty much gonna be lost on you, huh?
Giles: Sorry.
Xander: Hey, it's okay.
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Xander: Boy, I am so sorry. Doug's arm is kinda like spaghetti. We're all so very sad for him. Is your lunch okay?
Jack: What are you, retarded?
Xander: No. I had to take that test when I was seven. Little slow in some stuff, mostly math and spatial relations, but certainly not challenged or anything. Can I get you another soda?
Jack: I outta cut your face open.
Xander: Hey, it was an accident. Cool down.
Jack: You wanna be starting something?
Xander: What? Starting something? Like that Michael Jackson song, right? I had a lot of fun. Too high to get over, yeah yeah. Remember that fun song?
Jack: When I get my buddies together, we're gonna kick your ass til it's a brand new shape. Now get out of here.
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Xander: Yeah, great knife. Although, it may technically be a sword.
Jack: She's called Katie.
Xander: You gave it a girls' name. How very serial killer of you.
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Xander: I know what you're thinking. Can I get by him, get up the stairs, out of the building with seconds ticking away. I don't love your chances.
Jack: Then you'll die too.
Xander: Yeah, looks like. So I guess the question really is, who has less fear?
Jack: I'm not afraid to die. I'm already dead.
Xander: Yeah, but this is different. Being blown up isn't walking around drinking with your buddies dead. It's little bits being swept up by the janitor dead and I don't think you're ready for that.
Jack: Are you?
Xander: I like the quiet.
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Xander: The important thing is that we're alright and we can work this out like two reasonable... frontiersmen.
Jack: Where do you want it?
Xander: What?
Jack: Where do you want it?
Xander: I'm fairly certain that I don't want it at all, but thank you.
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Xander: I'm gonna grab a snack, anyone want? Oz?
Oz: No, I'm oddly full today.
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Xander: It's just that it's bugging me, this cool thing. I mean, what is it? How do you get it? Who doesn't have it? And who decides who doesn't have it? What is the essence of cool?
Oz: Not sure.
Xander: I mean, you yourself Oz, are considered, more or less, cool. Why is that?
Oz: Am I?
Xander: Is it about the talking? You know, the way you tend to express yourself in short non-committal phrases.
Oz: Could be.
Xander: No, you're in a band. That's like a business class trip to cool with complementary mojo after takeoff. I gotta learn an instrument. Is it hard to play a guitar?
Oz: Not the way I play it.
Xander: But on the other hand, eighth grade, I'm taking the flugelhorn and getting zero trim. So the whole instrument thing could be a mislead. You need a thing. One thing nobody else has. What do I have?
Oz: An exciting new obsession. Which I feel makes you very special.
Xander: Now with the mocking, which I can handle because I know I'm right about this. I'm on the track. I just need to find my thing.
Oz: It seems like you're over thinking it. I mean, you've got some identity issues. It's not...
Giles: The end of the world.
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Xander: I'm good. I'm fine. Just a little bit dirty. Good show everyone. I think we have a hit.
Willow: Are you okay?
Xander: Tip top. Really. If anyone sees my spine laying around, just try not to step on it.
