10-04-02 Things are about the same. Thought I would write down my experiences with various pharmacy companies--the ones you can order from without prescription.
The very best has been www.healthcarepharma.com. I've found them extremely useful, but they care no controlled substances, so look there for Ultram (tramadol), blood pressure meds, diuretics and so on.
The next--and just as dependable is www.medicapharma.com. Same basically as the one above, but the prices are different and you can get a few regular prescription meds here that you can't at the other. No controlled substances.
STAY AWAY FROM Uniglobalpharmacies.com. I only--supposedly--got a refund after waiting two months--because I wrote their credit card handler. Man, I could not get anyone to write me with when my order was shipped, then got one saying allow 2 weeks. NOW they say they are refunding my money--but they did say they shipped my meds, didn't they? A lying company, apparently. Not a good sign. Ordering and getting nothing, plus trying to get in touch with them and failing are not good signs either.
I've ordered from a variety of smaller companies but only once, so I will hold back judgment there. :-)
My health hasn't changed--except for the worse. We'll see what's going on when I get to go to the doc.
9-23-02 Things are going steadily down hill. I've been keeping a pain/medication journal and have seen clearly what is going on with me. MS, not lupus. All the signs are there, now I have to get to a doc and have it confirmed. Considering that it has been over 10 years since I started getting ill, its about time my symptoms were so clear. The neurological problems are getting worse and worse. Now I can barely stand. My legs/ankles/hips are uncontrollable. I nearly fall--which is okay in the house--I'm always close to something to grab. haha My spine feel "wiggly" often. When I bend my head down to my chest I get a wave of electricity going down my body to my feet.
My speech has gone to scanning--uh--uh--wait a minute--I know the word-- haha Happens a lot. I've gone to shopping in a wheelchair--and have my own so I am not at the mercy of the stores.(Dead batterries stranding you in the middle of the store and no manual w/c.)Many things are cropping up now. Still--THE FEET burning--and hands.
Now waiting for the Dec. insurance start. Hope I make it. Its getting BAD.
9-9-02 Its been a while. Nothing really new except I am going quite insane from the constant feet and hand burning. Walking is difficult, as usual. Balance is off and I am having real walking problems. I can't seem to go in a straight line. :-) I bet I look drunk to others if I walk in a store. :-) I pretty much stay at home these days. The pain is nearly intolerable without meds and barely tolerable with them. I now take the Ultram/tramadol, Neurontin, 300 mg, Catapres--yes, it deals with nerve pain remarkably well--and sometimes Panadeine--an acetamenophen and codein med. The Panadeine does nothing until I take all the other meds. I suppose it just adds one more way of killing pain. Narcotics are useless.
My memory is getting worse. I scan through my mind for words, which is frustrating as all get out. :-) I know the object or the word I want to use, but can't reach it in my mind and say it. Bugs me silly. :-)
My mother died last month and I've been dealing with a certain amount of stress over it. It was sad seeing her life fail. At least her pain is over and I find comfort in that. I miss her though.
Nothing else really knew. Every day is the same--pain, pills, trying to make do. Its okay. I can handle it as long as the pain is controllable.
5-14-02 I have been having great luck with healthpharma.com for my Ultram orders--and other prescription meds. Famadrug is a complete bust--nothing for two-three months but promises, so far. Time to cancel the card order on THAT one. haha
I'm not doing well. The stiffness of my body is twrrible--especially in the mornings. I have to stretch my hands out of fists, my toes and legs out of thinking they are boards. haha I have been having a lot of abdominal pain and my back aches so much it hurts most of the time. Muscles are going into knots everywhere. I'm getting real TIRED of all this stuff! I haven't felts good in I don't know how long--truly I have forgotten. The good days are REALLY few, it seems.
I have noticed changes in my muscles--a lot in the last two months. The are tensing up and seem not to know how to relax anymore. I even held my forearm so tightly in my sleep that I gave myself bruises. I had been waking up with a death grip on my arm, but never got bruises until lately. Now I try to keep my arms away from each other at night. :-)(Not easy when you can only sleep one way--on your stomach. haha)
I just hang in here and hope for the best. There really is nothing else to do. I try to keep busy and have been remodeling the house--as much as I can.
4-20-02 Well some of the pharmacies online I have tried are working very well, some suck. Famadrug is a bad one. I ordered a month ago--nothing. The best for the Ultram and other non-controlled meds is healthcarepharma.com. They delivered to me three times--always--so far--within two weeks. They also have great prices.
I am getting stiffer and stiffer. In the morning I feel like I am made of wood and walking is becoming a real challenge any time. I am about to go to a cane...then there will be the wheelchair. Something needs to stop the progression of this disease. (The doc I last saw said it was fibro--as had my Texas doc.) I don't care what its name is--just do something about it. :-)
I still have to have help with getting enough sleep. That seems VERY important. I don't get restful sleep at any time, but meds help. I am always "just on the edge" when I sleep--slight noises wake me.
Well, maybe next posting will show an improvement. I don't count on it, but I sure HOPE.
3-31-02 Things have not been going well--especially since the overseas dug company I have been using has messed up my Ultram orders. They have become VERY inaccurate and "iffy" to use, so I have found others--in the hopes of getting my Ultram/tramadol through them. I'll keep you posted. Because of the careless and rotten way the #1drugstore has been acting, I have been forced to endure DAYS/WEEKS of excruciating nerve and muscle pain. PLEASE DO NOT USE THIS COMPANY. They are unreliable. I got where I counted on them and they failed me. I will never forget the pain I am in. Nerves in both feet and hands are fire coursing through fine messed skin--my muscles are cramping left and right, especially in the left leg. Shooting pains up and down my legs. This was all unnecessary. I thought I had a good relationship with the company...............and they do this to me without so much as "We are aorry." Starve them out, you all. :-)
Easter was tough--for not having any sleep because of pain. It was nice to spend time with relatives that I am close to, though. (Though I wish I felt better and they didn't have to feel bad for me. I tried to get around as well as possible and not complain. I guess loved ones can tell.)
I have been suffering ever since #1 drugstore did me in--though I have resorted to some of those highly expensive American sites out of desperation. Like I said, I may have found three companies that are reasonably priced sources for the ultram. We will see if they are dependable or crooks too.
Got to get up from the computer now. Can only sit for a short while. I keep wanting to fix up the site--replace bad links and so on, but not possible when I'm suffering like this.
8-4-01 I've been suffering a great deal with what feels like spasms in my esophagus. Feeling like a heart attack, goes on for sometimes days, but it relieved by swallowing or back massage, or heat. Went to a doc at the local Quick Care and of course he wanted to send me to the hospital. They just will not understand it is not my heart. The EKG came out normal---so YES it could still be a heart attack--but more likely something else. Why not treat the spasm and see if that cures it? Always wanting to pop you in a CCU unit just to be sure. What kind of logic is that--especially when I won't go??
No, I went for nothing. Understandably--from his viewpoint--he wouldn't treat my pain, but goodness......to do NOTHING? All I can imagine is that he didn't care about me so much as care whether it was my heart or not--and didn't trust himself enough to treat the spasms. You can tell them endlessly that you have suffered this since the mid-80s---that you KNOW what it is--and they insist on not believing you.
Oh well, I dealt with it like always but it lasted more than a week this time. My esophagus clamps down and swallowing anything is very painful--sometimes getting "stuck". I sometimes have these that start at the end of my digestive system and travel all the way up to my mouth. I HATE those. :-)
Otherwise things are about the same--though my legs are not bothering me quite as bad. I don't know if it is the meds I am on or that I am not walking as much. It seems everything going on comes and goes in waves--getting worse, then easing. Sometimes the waves are very long, but none of the symptoms seem to be present all the time.
Better go. Stupid MSN wants to keep hanging up while I write this out. These people are getting on my nerves. :-) I'll say "No" I don't want to get off and it will still hang up. Grrr. haha Oh well, one day I will change that, too. :-)
7-5-01 Nothing different, though my right leg is getting worse. (My shouloder problem is all cleared up.)I can't tell if it is my back, my hip, or in my muscles. The blood supply is good.
I suppose I am going to have to go through another search for a physician. It is so hard to find one that remembers why they are in medicine--you know.....that they want to serve and assist people. I get these ones that have attitudes or are too stupid to take chances with. (Well, stupid is not exactly the right word, I suppose. They do not know medicine well and are stubborn about admitting it even to themselves. I use dumb ones, because of my training, but I pity a lay person ending up with them.)
I've pondered on and off about why some people go into medicine. They clearly have no desire to help others and they are not especially stimulated by acquiring medical knowledge. I suppose their parents or someone pushed them into it--or they went for money without considering what they would have to do to get it. It makes no sense to me. I went into nursing to help others and money had nothing to do with it. Yes, I got paid, but that allowed me to be there when someone needed me.
I am see so many physicians that just do not care. They make instant decisions on someone they do not know in a situation they have never had to deal with, and apparently don't care if they are right or not. They miss, or choose to ignore, vitally important signs in their rush to get the patient out of the office. How is that practicing medicine? (Well maybe literally they are "practicing", but they will never get expert at that rate. LOL)
I continue to get Ultram (tramadol) through
1 Drugstore They have proven to be the most reliable of any online pharmacy I have tried. I get my shipments quick and efficiently. I never worry when I use them.
If you try them, I hope you will have the same luck. You will not find controlled substances there, but they have a good many meds that are helpful to us. When they ship through regular mail I get my order usually within a week. They have an express service, but I am starting to shy away from that. Those packages always go through custums--which means they can be held by them if they "feel" like it. They are really overzealous with how they have been seizing packages, I understand. I have had no trouble--as I don't order narcotics or anything--but some friends can't get any strong pain meds through into the U.S.
I suppose that is enough complaining. :-) All in all I am not doing a lot better, but I am getting through it all with my head up--as much as possible. We are considering a wheelchair for me to get around in--isn't that awful? I guess you do what you have to. My brain wants to do so much, but my body will not let me. All you can do is the best you can.
I hope all of you are feeling well. Hang on if not........fall is always better than summer. haha
4-23-01 Well, I have gotten all the meds I have ordered from the various places I tried. Some were VERY late. The best so far has been "your pharmacy point" which has changed its website and name. Since they do not deal with any controlled substances they seem able to ship things express and it gets to you within a week--without complications. Their new addy is: http://www.1drugstore-online.com/showproducts.asp I have been the most impressed with them--and their reliability. They seem to follow the laws very closely--so that their shipments go through customs without a problem.
I have been suffering from a shoulder blade/back pain for about a month now. The muscles all go into spasm and hurt a lot. It seems to be easing so I hope it will all go away soon. :-)
Nothing else really new. I am taking MSM for my legs and it really seems to help a lot. I can walk with less pain and sometimes I hardly notice pain and muscle cramps at all--to a point. Just a check in. (I am changing the email address on all my pages, which may take a while.)
3-8-01 Not much new. I have received only the medication from Your Drug Point--every other order has not shown up. I am STILL trying to get them--writing and so on--but so far nothing. I guess someone had to try them out, but it sure ended up a waste of money. haha Anyone know of a dependable company?
I am making it well with the Ultram. I take one--sometimes two--at night to ease the pain enough to sleep. I don't always sleep, but at least I get a little respite from the pain. I have found that taking the Neurontin only at night helps me to sleep well. I take two and before too long I am asleep and sleep ALL night--usually. haha Its a real aggravation not to sleep--especially when there is so much pain. Sleep is what I really need. When I sleep all night I can do chores until the afternoon--light chores with rest periods. Sure, sometimes I pay with pain for doing it all, but at least I get something done. :-)
Any new symptoms? Ummm....I am having more cardiovascular problems. (My heart suffers if I do not take my beta blocker and I'm having more migraines.) My left leg continues to cause walking problems. I wonder a good bit about its blood supply even though the foot is warm. I fear arteritis the most--near the hip. My abdominal pain has eased some. It hasn't doubled me over with pain in quite a while. I still suffer muscle spasms everywhere.
We are planning another move--and that is causing me stress. I just cannot take this city. There is no health benefit to living here like I thought there would be and frankly my relatives are driving me nuts. :-) It is amazing how you age and see what the family members are all about. haha My family seems most involved in managing other people's lives--in bizarre and irrational ways. Control issues abound. Heck, why can't they just let others do what they need to do? Weird. :-)
Healthcare is very bad here. I have never seen anything like it. It is as if every doctor is timed to see how fast he/she can get out of the room. I have not found one caring physician here. Not one--not even slightly caring. They think they are charging us simply to see them--not be treated or listened to.
The one I had the greatest hope for was very strange. He misled a med student about some of my problems--actually lied to her. He was short tempered and unattentive--if you could catch him long enough to explain anything. He discounted everything I said rather than explore it.
Another was a total waste. He rushed in--and without so much as looking at my medical history--claimed he did not see any problems. What a fruitcake. haha As he was leaving I mentioned my diabetes and he panicked. Idiot.
It seems all the docs are that way here from what I have heard and experienced. Very strange. They all seem to have forgotten what they swore they would do in their oaths. The dollar--the time--is all that matters to them. I am ready to return to better pastures where docs remember what they are suppose to do and remember that patients need them to listen. I want to go back to my old doc. He was great. Smart and very caring. Maybe I'll get back that far. Right now everything is up in the air.
1-23-01 I write in here and it vanishes. :-) Oh well. Nothing new going on. Friends are falling prey to bad lupus side effects--kidney and liver damage. It is hard to believe that so many are experiencing the same problems all at once. All I can do is try to support them and hope they will get over the problems.
I am doing well. Sleeping pretty well. My pain is bearable and the Ultram--one at night sometimes--seems to keep by nerve pain at bay all the time. (Affects nerve pain transmission?) It sure causes itching, though. Hey, I'll itch rather than hurt. :-) I have not taken my Neurontin for weeks and I am still doing well with the one Ultram. Very strange.
1-19-01 Got my new order from a new site--express in 2 days! STILL have not received the order from myprescriptionmedications. I finally got a terse email more or less saying I ordered at my own risk--despite the $30.00 guananteed delivery cost I spent. They say it may have been taken by customs--but there are no controlled substances in it. They also claim I have to wait 50 days and if I get a letter from customs, they will help me with it. Gads! It could take 2-3 months to get the order, if I ever do. The other order was for Ultram (generic) and I got it without problems and it was delivered faster than expected.
This company is in Thailand--Bankok--and its address is Your Drug Point. They take Visa and there are other payment options available--including Western Union. The quality of the generic Ultram seems pretty good, though it does not seem to work as well--but is faster acting. I got my tramadol in an express courier envelope. All the contents were inside a brown envelope. The original box was collapsed down and two packages of the capsules were placed between cardboard. I was a bit leery at the pills not having a sealed bottle, but took one anyway. haha I am still alive and well.
They have a Ultram that is "retarded"--which means time-released to us Americans. You take 2 capsules for 24 hour relief. That may be a smart way to go for you who suffer constantly. They have other meds, also, though not as many as some. I was so surprised to actually get the tramadol in 3 complete days--2 at my own figuring. haha They sent it on the 15th and it arrived on the 17th. It said free express and they were not kidding. :-)
Right now I am doing better. I have been sleeping at night--one of the sleepy spells, I guess. The tramadol I took seemed to break the pain cycle and I am more comfortable without any pain meds. right now. If I could get my energy level up, I might actually get something done around the house and in my life. Walking is still very difficult. I am having pain under my left ribs, but that has been there a long time and docs just pay it no attention. It is steadily getting worse, but I guess whatever is wrong will one day be so obvious some doctor will do something about it.
1-14-01 So far I have not received my medication from the site I had ordered it from, so I wouldn't order any of it from there if I were you. Let's see if I get mine first. They are so incredibly slow! I have written and just get "any day now" I should receive them. I wrote them again yesterday and still haven't heard from them. So far it has been nothing but broken promises. I've tried another site. We'll se how they work out.
Healthwise, I am doing pretty good. Still suffering pain. Still having far too many sleepless nights. My right hip is now giving me more trouble than the left--for a change. Still having twitching hands and muscles. No improvements and not much worse.
Reluctant to go see my "old" doctor. (That new one can take a hike, the fool.) I suppose I'm afraid of getting more run around from even him. No doctor has ever been correct in treating me, unless I was at death's door--then they figure out what is wrong. I'm ready to just wait and see what happens. I'm ready to wait until I get so bad with SOMETHING that they will finally know what to do about it. Its for the birds and not ideal, but it saves me grief. I don't really care any more. Let happen what happens. I'll handle it the best I can, until it either kills me or they finally do something about it. I'm tired of fighting it all.
12-20-00What frustration! I just got back from seeing a physician--in my never-ending search for a compassionate, intelligent doctor--only to have met ANOTHER reserved, unimaginative, apparently unintelligent doctor. This one did nothing but refer me to a neurologist, which I agree with. No thought to the pain or troubles I have been having. His suggestion for my sleeping problem was the Elavil again. I'm anout to give up all together and just sit here and do the best I can. (Though I have finally discovered how to get meds over the 'net without a prescription. www.myprescriptionmedicines.com You have to buy $100.00 worth, but at least there is hope.
Oh PLEASE don't write me and tell me how bad that is! PLEASE don't write me with all the natural "cures" out there! I won't bother reading any of it. Been there, done that, and what a waste of money. As to the meds, what am I expected to do? Curl up and die because I can't stand the pain anymore?
It must be some way I act that makes doctors think I am not suffering. I must be too cheerful, for I have learned that moaning and carrying on is worse--and the docs chose to think you are a mental case when you compain and make a fuss. Damned if you do and damned if you don't.
I am always believed when I am about to die--literally--or when I am suffering so much I cannot move. They never listen when I tell them things are getting bad. THEN they ask why I waited so long! Grrr. It is just so frustrating!
I realize I am having all this trouble because I am a woman. I had hope when I went into this clinic and they asked if I was in an abusive relationship. (They supported an organization that aides women trapped in bad relationships.) "Hey," I thought, "maybe they care about women." WRONG! A man with the same complaints would be taken more seriously.
They would take this esculating nerve pain seriously. They would take the walking problems and muscle troubles seriously. They would understand what hardship this puts on me. They wouldn't have a thought that perhaps I am acting--and not really suffering. Why they think a woman would pretend and voice such strong complaints about pain is a mystery to me. Heck, I want to live a half-way normal life! This sucks!
I realize it is also because I have a medical background. Many physicians get threatened by nurses. They seem to think we are trying to diagnose and treat ourselves. (So why are we in the doctor's office?) Heck, it sure wouldn't take much to know more than most of them--especially when they are acting stupid because they want to impress you that they know better. :-)
I have thought of playing stupid, but I have to tell them about my background to cover my awareness of medication and proceedures--otherwise they think I'm a hypochondriac. (I just cannot lie or play-act very well.)Even so, I doubt I would get any better care if I hid my medical knowledge.
What can a woman do?? Does anyone out there know of a good doctor in Las Vegas?? I am desperate! I am near tears just out of frustration. I am about to give up completely with going to doctors. This sucks!!!
11-17-00 I cannot believe it has been so long since I wrote here. :-) Well, things have not been going well. All my meds have been changing. The doc took me off the beta blocker blood pressure med because it masks low blood sugar readings, but we have yet to find a med that works without bad side effects, so I go back on it until the next prescription. :-) The brand new type of BP med--Avalide--does me no good at all. It has my diuretic in it, so I take it anyway, but I take the beta blocker type when my head feels like it is about to explode. haha
I have been placed on Neurontin for nerve pain and apparent neuropathy in my feet. The first few days on it I was "zoning" out, but now it only affects my balance. haha I am getting where I know the walls pretty good from bouncing off of them. :-)
I have also been been put back on my anti-inflamatory med. It is doing a fair job of stopping the shooting arthritic pain everywhere.
I am very unhappy that moving here to the mountain desert hasn't improved my symptoms. (I still have sinus problems, too.) I feel frustrated that I am still ill and getting worse. The pain I have been enduring is totally unacceptable. I've developed pain along the nerves in my legs, especially the left one, and my hands, fingers, and misc. muscles are all jumping. I have the silliest stabbing nerve pain in my scalp from time to time. Combined with all the joint pain--which moves from one place to another--and all the other symptoms, I sometimes wonder if living is really worthwhile.
I don't want to live in pain--not this kind of pain. One type of pain at a time is okay--I can handle it--but all of it at once is overwhelming. Day after day--week and month after another--is too much sometimes. Yes, I get depressed and who wouldn't? When you have no energy, cannot go out in the daylight and do things if you felt like it, and endure fifty kinds of pain so that you cannot do anything except sit and cry....you begin to wonder what the future holds--and if you have a future anyway.
It is staggering how all this has affected my life. My optimism has come down a good bit after years of health complications and pain. I try. Really. Sometimes it just gets to me. I am finding it is getting to me more and more as more symptoms arise. The frustration that blooms out of the failures of various "cures" and "reliefs" just compounds the problem.
I want to just hide away, do the small things I can, and not be irritated by the noises and flutter from others. I feel I have enough to endure without suffering from all the irritation that thoughtless people inflict.
Loud noises cause physical pain. People with senseless advice and dictorial attitudes drive me nuts and cause my muscles to tense--which causes pain. The silly fluttering and brainless rattling of some people puts me on edge--again tensing muscles and nerves. It is just all too much sometimes. It is more comforting to be alone, but then I feel I am missing out on life. Still, I can move at my own rate when alone; sit or lay as I wish; be comfortable; endure my pain quietly. I am becoming a hermit and that is okay, all things considered. I wish it wasn't that way, but it is.
My one hope is that someday a cure will be found. (A new treatment is coming, supposedly--finally. "Astera" or prasterone is on the FDA's fast track and is proving to relieve the symptoms of mild to moderate Lupus. Maybe it can help. I wonder how %$@# expensive it is going to be. Okay, I'm becoming pessimistic and jaded. haha)
Well, I think I've made up for my lack of writing. haha Just wanted to vent and let others know they aren't the only ones feeling these things. Guess its the nature of chronic illnesses--especially those involving pain, which everyone else takes so lightly.
I suppose sleep deprivation has something to do with it, too, but it is difficult to sleep when you hurt. I lay there--cursing a unsympathetic doctor and civilization--shifting constantly trying to find a comfortable spot or position when there isn't one. I end up getting up, waiting for the next time I can take the Neurontin, counting the few Ambien pills I have left and wondering if it is worth taking and being down one more. Its pitiful! haha Its reality, but stupid, too. Bean counting. Trying to save medication for the really desperate times. Fourteen sleeping pills have lasted two months, and there are three left in the bottle. If I don't take care they will be gone and I wonder if I can get more. I'm sure not addicted to them--I never would allow that--but I suffer for the few who abuse drugs. Ridiculous and apparently unavoidable.
6-29-00 Yesterday was terrible. Suffered pain in joints, muscles, and everything else. What a nightmare. I was so weak I could barely move and the pain was unrelenting. My heart was going into stuttering rhythms.
I'm better today, but muscles are sore to touch and my energy is still very low. There has got to be something that can be done about this. Doctors are all so worried I'll get addicted to pain medicine, so I guess they would rather I just suffered. I can't really blame them, I suppose, but it shows their lack of understanding about how pain meds work and pain management. They also don't know me--I am NOT the kind of person that gets addicted to medicine. I was a nurse for a lot of years--had access to every med known to man--and was never even tempted. Even in the days before unit dosage--where the meds were just sitting around--I never considered taking any I had access to. What? They think I WANT to become a drug junky now? Pah!
No, its thoughtlessness on their part. They think the alternative to not giving out Vicodan and other drugs is to let you suffer so much you just lay there and cry. (And it isn't OUR fault science hasn't come up with better--what there isn't money enough in it?) Its torture. A decent person wouldn't treat a dog this way. Why is it good enough for a human? Or is it just because I'm a woman?
6-19-00 Left leg is really becoming a problem. Pain whenever I try to walk very much--from the hip down. Hope it isn't arteritis like so many lupus patients have. A real bummer.
Its 4 am and I'm still up. Had to stop using the Elavil because it exhausted me so much in the daytime--so much so I couldn't function. It wasn't working especially well in helping me sleep any way. Why can't there be a med that can help a person to sleep but isn't addictive? Geez....this is torture. I know I'd feel so much better if I could just sleep!
All in all I suppose I'm feeling better. I, at least, have ideas about doing things around here that need being done. haha Doesn't mean they are getting done yet, but I have the desire. Maybe one day...
6-9-00 Well, I DO have diabetes, like I thought. Bummer. :-) Still, maybe I'll feel better when it gets dealt with. God only knows what I'm going to eat. haha I can't/don't eat citrus fruits, high acid foods, milk products, mayonnaise, beans, raisins, figs, grapes, and who knows what all else. (I hate eggs and I'm not much of a meat eater--except for poultry. I don't eat butter or margerine much....The dietician is going to have fun. haha)
My doctor visit went well and she is one smart woman. I think its going to work out. :-) I'm being treated for a bladder infection--who knows--maybe she can get rid of it. She put me on Elavil to help me sleep, but it doesn't work. (I'm writing this at 1 a.m.)I do feel a bit groggy, so maybe eventually I'll sleep. The sore on my ankle is a LOT better because of antibiotics. I've soaked it in epsom salt and hot water. Really brought down the swelling.
This doctor has me thinking positively. Maybe I can get where I feel better soon. I told her I was sick of feeling bad and so exhausted all the time and she said she would do what she could to help me feel better. Needless to say I really enjoy her.
As to the new service I used that offers medical discounts, I'm going to have to try them a bit longer before I suggest anyone uses them. I don't know how much the last visit was and I had a dickens of a time getting to the doctor because the company wasn't organized. We will see how much they actually saved me and then I'll give out their address or not. :-)
I know one thing, our bank offers a prescription card and it worked GREAT--it came with our account. Really saved me a bunch on the meds I had filled--almost as cheap as you can get ordering online. (That's cheap. haha)
5-27-00 Muscle pain is a bit better--or I've just gotten use to it. haha Now I have an infection--mostly under the skin--just above my right ankle. Its really swelling. I'm trying to see a doctor--a woman--right down the street, but so far this service I'm using hasn't contacted me. (I'll post their address after I try them. They are suppose to provide health care at a discount for we who do not have insurance.) We'll see how they do. So far I'm NOT impressed, but I give them allowances for the Memorial Day holiday.(Its been 5 days)
Energy seems a bit higher and the muscle pain isn't near as bad, except in my shoulders and neck. :-) Stabbing pains and jumping muscles are easier to take than a whole body cramp. haha
5-22-'00 Having a LOT of muscle pain. It hasn't gotten much better and at times is worse than when I went to the doc's. Muscles jump, cramp, and in general hurt. Something needs to be done, that's for sure. This is really getting me down.
5-1-00 Things have gotten difficult again. They've been difficult. My muscles have decided it is time to HURT with any exercise. Walking through a grocery store sends me home with pain everywhere. Muscles cramps was what it started as--in legs, back, arms, and even fingers. Now its a constant thing. The sides of my hips are the worse, and my calves. I'm wondering about fibromyalgia. That caused some depression. At least I could walk before--even if it was at night or dashing from store to store. Now it doesn't matter when I have the energy to go out. I can't bear the pain of moving around.
 I had a doctor visit. Went in because of the increasing pain and cramping and--of course--they found my blood pressure extremely high--237/134. Being in bad pain for 5 days before seeing anyone didn't help, but my BP hasn't been wanting to be controlled lately either. He FINALLY increased my medicine back up to 100 mg twice a day--like I use to be on. (I knew one dose wouldn't do it, but my old doc wouldn't increase it back up for some reason.)
 Now I have to go to a clinic in the next couple of weeks to get my BP checked and more meds. That means trying to get along with physicians that don't usually know much about lupus, or don't care enough. (They would if I was a man.) My luck, I'll end up with someone that has a God complex, ignores anything I say, and carries an attitude that they know everything--including what I know I'm feeling. I hope I'll get some confident physician the first time--one not threatened by working with a nurse and her health--but I don't find that likely. (sigh) I guess its a physician thing to have that sort of attitude--due to the way they are all trained. I'd like to know who ever told any of them they know everything and are psychics. THAT person should be thrown in the pit with me and see how THEY like it. I'd like to know who taught them that they don't have to work with patients or answer suggestions with more than a sceptical look or a tongue lashing.
I know for a fact I am more right than wrong when I deal with my health--far more right than doctors. I know what I feel and experience. They aren't in my skin. I'm logical and reasonable. I'm educated and intelligent. Okay, I'm a woman, but that doesn't mean I'm stupid and overly emotional!
If I had listened to doctors, I'd still be a cripple. I'd have died 3 times--at least. I was mis-diagnosed when I had cancer, severe migraines, and nearly every time I've gone to a doctor. (The doc I saw with my muscle pain said he thought it was due to my high blood pressure--never mind I have the pain all the time AND when the pressure is down. Guess he didn't know much about lupus and muscle pain--and didn't want to show his lack of knowledge.)
(sigh) What a pain. It adds insult to injury, but I'm getting ahead of myself. I've been recommended a physician that's suppose to be good. Maybe he'll work out. Maybe we can see things eye to eye--or nearly. I can hope, but I don't expect it.
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